


The Fallout

by GleeCastOST



Series: Nowhere to Hide - The Series [2]
Category: Warrior Nun (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:08:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 23
Words: 41,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25868722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GleeCastOST/pseuds/GleeCastOST
Summary: SEQUEL TO 'NOWHERE TO HIDE'After a journey and half, Adriel is captured, and the sisters can return to Cat's Cradle. Despite the victory and their new hero status (thanks, Camila) everyone has trouble dealing with their trauma. Can they overcome and help each other in the face of a new threat? We'll see...
Relationships: Sister Beatrice/Ava Silva
Series: Nowhere to Hide - The Series [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1877140
Comments: 166
Kudos: 545





	1. A New Mission

**Author's Note:**

> you want it, you got it. I got a bunch of comments requesting a sequel, and i wanted to explore a lot more with these characters. So, here we are.

Two weeks after the battle with Adriel, Beatrice was cleared for light physical activity. It couldn’t have come sooner, as she felt restless. There was a lightly trafficked trail that wound its way up the hill overlooking Cat’s Cradle. It was this path she walked, as the sun rose, thinking it would help clear her head. 

Her ribs creaked as she walked, but the sharp pain of the days prior had been replaced with a dull ache. That, she could live with. Beatrice thought about her sisters, and their journey, as she walked. Normally, she enjoyed the thrill of a mission, but lately she was craving normalcy. Routine. 

As she crested the top of the hill, Beatrice looked down, admiring the beauty of Cat’s Cradle. Beyond it was the city and the ocean, creating a truly picturesque view. In the courtyard, Beatrice was surprised to see Ava and Lilith training. Lilith training early didn’t surprise her, but Ava wasn’t usually an early riser. 

Since they got back, though, Ava has seemed a little bit different. Not necessarily in a bad way, Beatrice thought, but she was more serious. Ava was usually honest with her, but she couldn’t shake the feeling that she was hiding something. 

Was it so inconceivable to think that Ava was changed by their extended mission? It was traumatic enough to affect them all and she took the brunt of it, along with Lilith. They both looked so different now. To Beatrice, the difference in appearance only seemed to punctuate their trauma-induced changes. 

Lilith’s grey hair was pulled into a loose braid, swinging behind her as she sparred with Ava. Beatrice still wasn’t used to seeing Lilith with grey hair and the claws only amplified the effect. Obviously, Lilith wasn’t the same girl that Beatrice had become friends with years ago, but not all of the changes were bad. She was more open, kinder. Beatrice was grateful that Lilith was still with them.

With only a sports bra on, the full extent of Ava’s scarring was visible. Beatrice closed her eyes for a moment, remembering Ava’s pain. Divinium scarring ran across her rib cage, its pattern so unique that it could almost be mistaken for a tattoo. Adriel’s handprint, on Ava’s wrist, had faded considerably since his capture, thankfully. All that was left was a faint reminder. Ava had insisted that her shoulder was fine, but even at this distance, Beatrice could see scarring across the back of her shoulder blade. 

It was almost symbolic, the wounds that the halo couldn’t heal. Beatrice viewed them like a transition of sorts. To her, they were a reminder of Ava’s journey, and becoming a true part of the OCS. Ava was goofy and flippant, but despite everyone’s early fears, she was pretty good at this. With more training, real training, she’d become better. 

An ocean breeze rose over the hill and Beatrice closed her eyes, savouring the feeling. The last few days she had felt trapped by her emotions. This feeling was only compounded by her injury. Beatrice was frustrated with herself, she felt as though she didn’t have a tight enough grip on her mental state. She had been practicing repressing her emotions for so long, yet now she was failing to keep things down. 

It was almost violent how quickly she could switch from one emotion to another. One minute, she would be with Ava, ecstatic and on top of the world. Moments later, when she was alone, she would be filled with hate and self-doubt. She wondered if the guilt came from the church or her parents. Both, she decided later. It was probably both. 

The sound of a motorcycle snapped Beatrice from her thoughts. Mary. At first, Beatrice thought she was going somewhere, but a look at the gate confirmed Mary was returning. It seemed as though everyone’s routines were altered lately. Beatrice began her descent as the day started to warm up. 

Almost refreshingly, Camila was in the library. Beatrice didn’t realise how much she was craving normalcy. 

“Good morning, sister.” Camila greeted Beatrice, from a table by the window. 

“Good morning.” Beatrice walked over to join her, smiling. Camila had gotten her cast off, although she was not yet permitted at training. 

“What are you reading?” Beatrice asked, sitting down. From the window, she could see the hill she had just stood on top of. More distracting, she could also see Lilith and Ava sparring with one another. 

“Diaries and accounts of past Warrior Nuns.” Camila answered, simply. 

“Why?” Beatrice had a feeling she knew why, but she wanted to be sure. 

“Bea… You can’t deny that Ava has abilities that haven’t been seen in a long time. Abilities that have maybe... Never been seen.” Camila trailed off, looking up for Beatrice’s reaction. Beatrice didn’t answer. Instead, she stared out the window, unable to look away.

“What’s bothering you?” Camila inquired, when Beatrice didn’t reply. 

“I…” She paused for a moment. “Does Ava seem different to you, since we got back? Does Lilith?”

“We all are.” Camila’s answer was simple, but true. “It wasn’t a normal mission, not by a long shot. It was… Well, it was different.”

“I know, but…”

“But nothing, Bea. You’ve changed, too. We’ve all come out of this as different people. Even a few months ago, you wouldn’t be here talking to me about your feelings. You would have shoved everything down, acted cold, and not talked to anyone.”

Beatrice felt her face go red, but she knew Camila was right. “Point taken. Still, I worry.”

“Because you love her.” Camila joined Beatrice in looking out the window. 

“I love all of you.” Beatrice knew what Camila meant, but she chose to ignore that.

“Bea, you know what I mean.”

“Nice shot, Ava!” Lilith praised her, from the ground. Ava offered her a hand and pulled her back to standing. 

“Thank you. Can we drill it again?” Ava asked, with only a hint of her normal, cocky smile. 

“Really? We’ve been out here for two hours already.” Lilith was surprised that Ava had taken such a shine to training. 

“Yes, really. I know you are already a beast, but I want to be ready… Just in case.” Ava admitted, wiping the sweat from her face. 

“I might already be…” Lilith made a face, “A  _ beast  _ as you say, but I have just as much work to do as you.”

“Fair point…” Ava acknowledged, thinking of Lilith’s struggle to control her new abilities. 

“Ready?” Lilith asked, after she had taken a quick drink of water and wiped her face. 

“Yeah, let’s go.” 

Watching Lilith and Ava spar was almost hypnotic - a mix between traditional martial arts and otherworldly ability. They traded blows, blocking and striking with a rhythmic consistency. Occasionally, however, one of them would teleport or phase, throwing the other off balance. If you could separate the sparring from the inherent violence, the dance between them was beautiful. 

Mary watched for a while, unnoticed on her walk up from the garage. Eventually, she was noticed, as Lilith pinned Ava to the ground.

“Good morning, Mary.” Ava said, from the ground.

“Good morning.” She nodded at both of them.

“Where were you?” Lilith asked, releasing Ava from the hold. 

“Around.” Mary didn’t leave time for anymore questions. She walked back into the building, to have a shower before breakfast. Coming back to Cat’s Cradle, especially now, had given her too much free time. It now seemed unavoidable that she would have to deal with Shannon’s death, now that distractions had become limited. 

Sleeping had been difficult since she returned, so each morning Mary left early, while it was still dark. She visited places that she had been with Shannon, whispering uncharacteristic prayers as she travelled. 

Although she would never admit this to anyone, Ava’s newfound focus and dedication was also disarming. Already, being around the halo reminded Mary strongly of Shannon. Now, however, Ava’s increased intensity was almost unbearable. Almost unconsciously, Mary had avoided not only Ava, but everyone, since they got back. 

At breakfast, all five of them sat together in silence. Camila tried to make conversation, but her attempts fell flat. Everyone was stuck inside their thoughts, almost unaware of those around them. 

Ava had put a shirt on before coming to breakfast, a fact that Beatrice was grateful for. Her hair was matted with sweat and she was already tired. Beatrice was holding her hand under the table, gently. Even this tie, however, was failing to keep Ava’s mind in the present. 

_ You were performing well today. Not well enough though, you still have to be better. Adriel could come back at any second. You need to be ready! There are still demons everywhere, too, so you need to be able to fight those. After breakfast, you need to get back to work.  _

Beatrice squeezed Ava’s hand, in an effort to draw her attention. She was unsuccessful. Camila’s words echoed in Beatrice’s head.  _ We all are.  _ Beatrice knew that Camila was right, but she hated how separate everyone felt since they had returned. Moreso, she knew that she couldn’t keep deferring her emotions forever. This last thought is the one that scared Beatrice the most. 

Dark circles hung under Lilith’s eyes, as she picked at her breakfast, barely eating anything. Ever since she had returned, eating had become a challenge. She wasn’t sure if it was a physiological effect of the journey, or a psychological one. Either way, she tried to choke down as much food as she could, knowing she would need the energy.

With everyone so lost in thought, Camila realised that no one noticed her quick run to the kitchen. “I know that no one wants to talk this morning…” Camila began, slightly timid. “But I made cinnamon rolls.” 

“Cinnamon rolls?” Ava perked up for a moment and Beatrice was relieved to see a glimpse of the old Ava. 

“Yes, here.” Camila passed Ava a roll, which she immediately bit into with glee. “Oh my  _ God _ , so good. Thank you Camila!”

Before anyone else could try Camila’s baking, they were interrupted by a much younger nun. 

“Hi… Um.. Sorry to bother you all… Mother Superion requested your presence.” She was obviously incredibly nervous. 

“Thank you, sister.” Beatrice thanked her, polite and formal. 

“What do you think that was about?” Mary spoke for the first time. 

“Maybe Mother Superion has finally considered my trampoline idea.” Ava smiled. 

“I don’t even want to know what that is.” Lilith scowled. “These are really good cinnamon rolls, though.” Lilith surprised herself by eating a whole one. 

“Thank you, Lilith.” Camila glowed with praise. “Maybe Mother Superion has a mission for us.” 

“I doubt that, you and I aren’t cleared for combat yet.” Beatrice noted, with a hint of sadness in her voice. 

“Well, maybe it’s not a  _ fighting  _ mission. Like… Maybe we have to hack a computer or something - find the nuclear launch codes before it’s too late.” Camila’s excitement was adorable and seemed to lighten the mood slightly. 

“That would be sick!” Ava exclaimed. “Maybe she is instituting a Cat’s Cradle kickball league - oh or dodgeball.”

“ _ Lord,  _ you two are ridiculous.” Lilith stood up, her plate still mostly full of food. “Best not to keep her waiting.” She added, as she left. 

“Ava, have you ever even played a sport?” Mary asked.

“No, that’s why it would be so fun!” Ava replied. Mary liked when Ava joked around; she felt as though Ava was easier to be around when she was being silly. In Mary’s mind, it created a degree of separation between the new, serious Ava. The Ava that reminded her of Shannon. 

Mary helped Camila up, as she still had a slight limp, and they left together. Ava and Beatrice were left sitting alone. 

“Ava?” Beatrice asked, gently, as Ava had almost instantly withdrawn into herself. 

“Hm? Yes?” Ava whispered, without looking directly at Beatrice. 

“We should go, too.”

Beatrice kept a hand on Ava as she got up, thinking that it would keep her grounded. Once they had dropped off their plates, they joined hands for the short walk down the hall. Although no one would admit it, everyone was a little bit nervous at the thought of a new mission.


	2. Left Behind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Missions are assigned, but someone gets left behind. She is not happy about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the stupid 'mi pan' song from tik tok is stuck in my head

“Thank you all for coming.” Mother Superion sat with her hands folded. “I have a mission for you, but it requires the utmost discretion.” 

“We can handle it.” Beatrice replied, respectfully. She stood at attention, with her hands behind her back. Ava thought, privately, that she looked both refined and professional. 

“I know you can, that’s why you’re here. I’m sure you all recall the… Differences of opinion between this chapter of the OCS and Cardinal Duretti. We still aren’t entirely sure what his relation to Adriel was - if he had any.” 

Everyone was focused intently on Mother Superion's words, but no one spoke. “There’s more…”

“There always is.” Mary noted, correctly. She was standing at the window, away from her sisters.

“Indeed. Some of my more...  _ Under the table  _ contacts have mentioned rumours… Rumours that seem to connect a little bit too well.”

“What kind of rumours?” Camila asked, from one of the chairs in front of the desk.

“These are unconfirmed, for now, so what I say doesn’t leave this room. Understand?” Everyone nodded their agreement, so she explained. 

“Allegedly, there are several powerful men, all connected to Duretti somehow, who are trying to summon demons. We aren’t sure why, not exactly, although I have my guesses.”

“Which are?” Beatrice inquired, wanting all of the available information before forming her own opinions. 

“It seems as though these corrupt church members are using the influence of demons for their own gain. More specifically, they are using demonic forces to influence geo-political relationships.”

“Why?” Lilith asked, standing behind Camila.

“Again, I have only theories. It isn’t unlikely that these men think that creating global insecurity will draw more people to the Church.” Mother Superion stated, solemnly. 

“Surely that would work. Although I’m obviously not advocating for it.” Beatrice seemed to be working through several possibilities in her mind as she sat in the chair next to Camila’s. 

“Is this even within our jurisdiction?” Mary wanted to know, genuinely. 

“I’m not sure what the scope of our mission is right now. If these rumours are substantiated, and I pray they are not, it could severely impact the OCS. It is in everybody’s best interest that we investigate.”

“I agree, this could get dangerous, fast.” Lilith whispered. 

“Is it possible that these men are misguided? As in, they think that they are actually serving the Church by doing this?” Beatrice weighed the possibilities in her mind. 

“Maybe, although I doubt it.” Mother Superion frowned. “A common thread that ran between each rumour was the emphasis on  _ personal gain,  _ with the Church as an additional benefactor to treachery.”

“So it’s corruption, pure and simple. We can handle that.” Mary added, confidently, but with a hint of anger. 

“Maybe. We need to investigate first, before we commit to any action. Our first few missions will be reconnaissance  _ only.  _ No fighting. Even a whiff of OCS could alert Duretti to our presence. Understood?”

“What are our assignments?” Camila asked, with less enthusiasm that one would expect from her.

“Two teams, different cities. 48 hours or less. Dress like civilians. Hopefully, you’ll bring back information that can help us determine our next course of action.” Mother Superion had obviously thought about this. 

Mary opened her mouth to speak, but was interrupted. “And yes, Mary, you can take the cars.”

“Yes!” It was the first time Mary smiled in days. 

“When do we leave?” Ava spoke for the first time since the meeting began.

“Ava…” Mother Superion hesitated. “You’re not going.” Her words drew a stunned look, not only from Ava, but from all the sisters. 

“Why?” Ava’s voice shook, as if she was about to cry.

“You’re not ready.” Mother Superion was resolute in her decision. Ava didn’t argue or fight. Instead, she phased through the floor, leaving her sisters with Mother Superion. 

“With all due respect, I sparred with Ava this morning. She is fighting better than she ever has.” Lilith made a case for Ava.

“This is a reconnaissance-only mission. Besides, it’s not her fighting I’m concerned about.” Mother Superion had obviously thought about this.

Beatrice felt for Ava, she also wished she was on assignment with her. They hadn’t been apart for more than a few hours in weeks. Ava was not going to cope well with being alone here, especially with where her mind has been lately. 

“Mary. Beatrice. You two are headed to France.” Mother Superion passed them a thick dossier. 

“Thank you.” Beatrice said as she grabbed the file. 

“Lilith and Camila, you two are headed to Portugal.” She gave Camila another file, equally as thick. “I want all of you out of here within two hours. I apologise for the short notice, but we need to be as ‘under the radar’ as possible.”

Ava paced angrily around her room. The room barely felt like hers - the walls were empty. Mary had removed all of Shannon’s things when they got back. Ava hardly owned anything, so the room was bare. It was more of a place to sleep than a proper bedroom, at least in Ava’s perception. 

_ Calm down, Ava, calm down.  _ She thought, feeling the halo burning her back.  _ Why don’t I get to go? I’m the goddamn halo bearer! Maybe Mother Superion has a point, though… Do you even want to go? You have nightmares every night, it’s not like you can manage your stress as it is. _

“God!” Ava shouted, out loud, as different voices in her head argued about her predicament. Different sides of her. Beyond the mission, Ava really didn’t want to be alone. Still, 48 hours isn’t that long. As Ava calmed herself, slowly, she heard a quiet noise from outside her door. 

Walking over, she noticed an envelope on the floor.  _ Ava.  _ That’s all it said on the front. Ava recognised Beatrice’s ornate handwriting instantly and opened the door. The hallway was empty. With the letter still in her hand, Ava ran down the hallway, and out the door.  _ Too late.  _ She had missed her window and two black sports cars descended the windy road that led to Cat’s Cradle. Ava cried despite herself, and retreated back to her room.  _ The room.  _

_ Ava, _

_ I know what Mother Superion said was hard for you to hear. What I’m about to write might be harder. I agree with her. I need you to trust that this is coming from a place of love and concern. Since we got back, you haven’t been… You. Maybe I am imagining it, and you are laughing at my foolishness, but it feels like there are new walls between us. Walls that, for once, I didn’t put up. Please try to take care of yourself while we are gone - I promise we’ll be back before you know it. I’ll miss you.  _

_ With love, _

_ Beatrice _

Ava laid back on the bed, looking up at the ceiling as tears burned her eyes. She read Beatrice’s letter several times over, running her fingers over the words. Beatrice’s handwriting was so neat, so expressive, so  _ her. _

To say that Ava was reclusive over the next two days would be a colossal understatement. She ate alone, ignoring the younger nuns who whispered about her as she passed. Camila’s stories had painted her as a hero, but it made Ava uncomfortable. 

After a sleepless night, Ava rose before dawn. Normally, this is when she would train with Lilith. Instead, she went for a run. While the halo had granted Ava the ability to walk again, she was not a practiced runner. She expended a lot of unnecessary energy, even as she focused on her form.

Tired legs carried her all the way to the ocean, as the sun rose lazily, illuminating the sky.  _ I didn’t mean to run this far. It’s not like I have anything better to do, though.  _ The still beauty of the morning was striking and made Ava smile - at least a little bit. She looked out at the calm sea, juxtaposed by a pink sky, and was grateful to see it. 

By the time Ava got back, the sun was much higher, the day much hotter. A mirage distorted her vision of the courtyard as she crossed it. After a quick shower, Ava was back outside, training alone. Unsure of what to do, she went through all of the basic fighting movements that she had learned. Slowly and methodically, she went through each one hundreds of times. 

“Ava.” Mother Superion interrupted her as she worked.

“I don’t want to talk to you.” Ava was rude, albeit understandably. 

“Ava, I know you are frustrated, but your tone is unacceptable.”

“I’m sorry.” Ava looked down, realising her mistake. 

“You’ve been training really hard lately, don’t think it goes unnoticed.” Mother Superion observed, beginning to walk away. 

“Then…” Ava stuttered. “Why couldn’t I go on the mission, too?” 

“For once, it's not your physical abilities that I am concerned with. It’s whatever is going on in that mind of yours.” 

Ava’s face dropped, embarrassed. “I don’t think that I’ve been that bad....” 

“Ava, I cannot imagine what the last month has been like for you. There is no shame in struggling to deal with it sometimes. For everyone’s sake, though, I hope you can figure it out soon. We can’t afford to have you out of commission forever.” Mother Superion added, with surprisingly genuine kindness in her voice. 

“I’ll try.” Ava replied. She meant it. 

“Good. Now go hit the weights. You’ve done enough technique practice for today.” She added, with a smile and a snap of her cane against the ground. 

Later that night, Ava laid in bed. She was beyond tired, unsurprising given the hours of training she put in today. Before going to bed, she read Beatrice’s letter several more times, savouring each word. Sometime tomorrow her sisters would be back,  _ she  _ would be back. Ava couldn’t wait. 

Unfortunately, the nightmares couldn’t either. Ava woke with a start, covered in sweat, at 4am. Unable to get back to sleep, she got up, feet cold against the stone floor. Searching for the same serenity as the day before, Ava ran to the beach, beating the sunrise this time. 

_ Get my head right.  _ Ava thought about Mother Superion’s words as she caught her breath in the sand.  _ What does that even mean? Sure, I haven’t been as silly since we got back, but I thought that was a good thing! Everyone thought I was stupid and annoying, right?  _

As much as Ava tried to convince herself that everyone else was being weird, she couldn’t. Deep down, she knew that a part of her was messed up.  _ I’m fucked up. I don’t want to be, but I am.  _ The realisation made Ava feel heavy with guilt. 

Instead of throwing herself into more training, Ava headed to the library upon her return. She was craving a change of pace - a change of scenery. Maybe some of the diaries would give her some insight on coping with this lifestyle - and the halo.

There was an oversized and comfortable chair tucked into the corner of the library, untouched by the sunlight streaming through the windows. It took her several trips to gather the books she wanted, before settling in the chair. 

_ Most of these aren’t in English or Spanish.  _ Ava chastised herself for not realising that earlier. Still, there were several entries that she  _ could  _ read, so she gathered her focus to get through those. Once Beatrice and Camila returned, they could help her get through the rest. 

There is no denying that Ava had noble intentions of being productive and doing research. There is  _ also  _ no denying that she was exhausted and sitting in the darkest corner of the library. Thus, it was mere minutes before Ava fell asleep in the book she was reading, curled up into an impossible position. 

The door creaked open, almost silently, a while later. 

“Ava? Are you in here?” A voice asked, getting no response. Upon turning the corner, Beatrice saw Ava, still asleep, and couldn’t help but laugh. Laugh and admire how cute she looked, that is.


	3. Coping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone struggles to cope - no surprise there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> McDonald's! McDonald's! McDonald's!: Ava, Camila
> 
> We have food at home: Beatrice
> 
> Orders One (1) Black Coffee: Lilith, Mary

Ava stood, awkwardly, in the corner of the room as her sisters debriefed with Mother Superion. She didn’t want to be present for this and she felt like dead weight on an incredibly adept team. Still, her presence had been requested, so she stood silently. Beatrice thought Ava looked like she would phase through the wall at any moment - that she was only just barely there to begin with. 

With a sad look, Beatrice took a seat in front of the desk and began laying out files for Mother Superion to look at.

“Did everything go according to plan?” Mother Superion asked, her face emotionless. 

“Yes ma’am. Something fishy is definitely going on.” Mary answered, respectfully. 

“Define fishy.” Mother Superion requested. 

“There is a church-affiliated library in Toulouse.” Beatrice began, recounting their findings with clinical precision. “It houses hundreds, if not thousands, of historical texts. Many of them are dangerous and kept from the public eye. In our findings, however, it appears that many of the more…  _ Instructional  _ texts had been  _ checked out. _ ”

“Checked out?” Mother Superion questioned.

“That’s what it seemed like. Under normal circumstances, books of that calibre aren’t allowed to be removed. At all.” Beatrice summed up, her words hanging like a dead weight in the air. 

“Very well.” Mother Superion noted, as she collected the files on her desk. 

Camila and Lilith began describing what they encountered in Lisbon. They too had reached a similar conclusion, albeit by different means. As they spoke and despite her best efforts, Beatrice’s mind wandered to a conversation she had with Mary the day before. 

“You seem happy.” Beatrice had said, as they drove across the French countryside. Mary had seemed happy. They drove with the windows down, letting the sweet smell of summer foliage fill the car. In the last two weeks, Mary had barely smiled, but today she couldn’t help but smile. To Beatrice, the change was almost disconcerting. 

“I am today, I guess.” Mary added, looking out the window. Beatrice was driving for a change. She was also enjoying the feel of the expensive automobile. 

“It’s nice to see.” Beatrice added, truthfully. “Since we have been back…”

“I know.” Mary interrupted her, before she could finish her sentence. 

“Why?” Normally, Beatrice wouldn’t have asked, wouldn’t have pried into other people’s business. Maybe she really had changed. 

“Beatrice, who even are you?” Mary laughed, then continued. “The Beatrice I know wouldn’t be asking these questions.”

“I don’t know.” The sentiment stuck in Beatrice’s head long after she said it. 

“Our last mission was a difficult one and that is putting it  _ beyond lightly. _ But it was a distraction, at least for me, and a welcome one at that.” Mary explained. “Now that we are back, things are quiet for the moment. There’s no choice but to… Feel, I guess.”

“I understand.” Beatrice whispered, barely audible over the sound of the wind. 

“God, and Ava is so different. We all got a little messed up by this, but Ava… She reminds me of Shannon - so much. It’s hard to be around her, now. I actually miss the stupid jokes.”

Mary’s words rang through Beatrice’s ears. She felt stupid that she didn’t realise this earlier, in hindsight it was obvious. 

“I’m sorry, Mary.”

“It’s not your fault, you know that. If anything, things are not as bad as they could be because of you. I know that we need to get our  _ shit  _ together and work as a team. I know. I just need a little bit more time.”

Beatrice could see tears on Mary’s cheek, so she held off on admonishing her swearing. “Hopefully we have time.” Beatrice added, darkly. They didn’t speak again until they drove into town, quickly discussing strategy. It was as though the conversation between them had never happened. 

“Beatrice?” Mother Superion snapped at her, regaining Beatrice’s attention.

“Yes? Sorry.” Beatrice was embarrassed at her lack of attention to their discussion.

“Did you hear what I said?” 

“No, I’m sorry.” She looked down and could feel the tips of her ears turn red.

“I won’t repeat myself again. Good work, all of you. I need some time to look over your notes and discuss things with my trusted sources. For now, you’re all expected to be training.” She dismissed them without another word.

Beatrice tried to catch Ava in the hallway as they left Mother Superion’s office, but Lilith had caught her first. As they headed out to train, Beatrice stood in the hallway, alone. Instead of following them, she headed up to the library to help Camila with translations.

After dinner, a gentle knock woke Ava up. It wasn’t that late and she hadn’t been meaning to fall asleep. Still in her bloody and sweaty training clothes, Ava answered the door, eyes half shut and yawning.

“Ava. Can we talk?” Beatrice’s voice was reverent, almost as if she hadn’t expected anyone to answer the door.

“Are you okay? Are we okay?” Beatrice asked, earnest, from the desk chair. Ava’s room was spartan and the desk was empty, save for Beatrice’s letter.

“Are we…” Ava looked down, ashamed. She hadn’t meant to hurt Beatrice, she wasn’t angry at her. Lately, though, it just seemed hard to show Beatrice how she felt. It seemed difficult to emote at all.

“I’m not angry at you, Beatrice.” Beatrice felt a rush when Ava said her name. “I could never be angry at you.”

“You are ignoring half my question.” Beatrice stated, trying not to let her voice get emotional. 

“I…” Ava laid back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. “I am not okay.”

“I know.” Beatrice whispered, laying gently next to Ava in bed.

“I’m scared.” Ava admitted, turned to face Beatrice. “I know that I am supposed to be brave and like… A hero or something, but I’m not. I’m just trying my best. I’m sorry.”

“Ava, you have nothing to apologise for.” Beatrice tentatively laid a hand against Ava’s cheek. Ava didn’t answer, instead pulling herself closer to Beatrice, curling up in her arms. Beatrice could feel Ava crying against her.

“What if he comes back?” Ava asked, after several minutes of silent crying.

“Then we will take care of it.” Beatrice answered, confident. 

“But…”

“No buts.” Beatrice interrupted Ava’s self-doubt. “We did it once, we can do it again. We’re stronger now. You’re stronger now.”

“Beatrice?”

“Yes?”

“Thank you for being with me.” Ava whispered, face pressed into Beatrice’s shoulder. 

“You don’t have to thank me.” Beatrice smiled, her face flushed. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” Ava sighed, feeling herself calm down in Beatrice’s presence. 

Empty footsteps echoed on the bloody stones as she walked. The steps that etched through the canyons of Hell seemed to stretch out, much farther than they had before. Demons thrashed along the valley, except this time, they noticed her. Within moments, they were screaming up the stairs, leaving no room for escape - 

“Lilith?” Camila tried to get her attention. 

“Hmm?” Lilith replied, her mind still halfway in Hell.

“Are you okay?” Camila’s concern was, of course, genuine and kind. 

“Yes, sorry. Just tired.”

Camila and Lilith had retired to the library following dinner. In her research, Camila had earmarked several passages pertaining to Hell and demon incidents, hoping to help Lilith find answers about her abilities. It was a thoughtful gesture, although Lilith was not coping with it particularly well. 

“I think I am going to go to bed. Thank you, Camila.” Lilith stood abruptly, leaving Camila alone in the library. 

“Good night, sister.” Camila whispered, Lilith already out of earshot. 

  
Camila wasn’t stupid - no one thought so. Although she didn’t push it that night, she knew that Lilith wasn’t  _ just tired.  _ She never looked rested and she barely ate. Camila sighed, turning to look out the window at the dark courtyard. 


	4. All Dressed Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava gets to go on a mission and Beatrice is a total smoke show.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short chap, i know, dont hate me. tomorrow's will be a bit more substantial (or two in a day) <3 stay safe

Lilith opened her door the following morning, but before stepping over the threshold, she noticed something on the ground. A quiche and a note. Unfolding the small piece of paper, Lilith had a feeling she already knew who it was from. 

_ Until you’re ready to talk. - Cam _

A rare grin spread across Lilith’s face as she walked down the hall that morning, eating quiche as she walked. Camila was either an excellent chef or she had been beyond hungry. More likely, the answer was both. 

“What are you smiling about?” Ava asked, with a chuckle, as Lilith joined her outside. Lilith didn’t reply as she stretched. Both of them had a renewed spirit compared to the day before and the change was palpable. 

From a hallway window, Beatrice watched Ava and Lilith sparring - the mix between standard martial arts and quick use of their powers. It was impressive to watch. She smiled as she watched, impressed by Ava’s progress. 

“She’s fighting well now, don’t you think?” Mother Superion asked, startling Beatrice. 

“There’s definitely a marked improvement from when she got here. Although, some of her techniques could use refinement.” Beatrice replied, formally. 

“Do you think she is ready?” 

“Ready?” Beatrice had a feeling she knew what Mother Superion meant, but she wanted to be sure. 

“Ready for a mission.”

“I think so. I’d be lying if I thought she was in perfect shape, mentally, but I think she can handle it.” Beatrice hoped she wasn’t making a poor judgement. 

“Thank you, Beatrice. We’ll start small.” Mother Superion turned away, then turned back. “My office, twenty minutes.” She added, hastily.

The next morning, Beatrice found herself nursing a hot coffee, way too early in the morning. On Mother Superion’s orders, they were headed back across the country, due to depart well before sunrise. As Beatrice drove, she was grateful for Camila in the passenger seat - their conversations were keeping her awake. Ava, who was joining them, was asleep in the back seat.

“Was she happy to be coming this time?” Camila asked, gesturing to Ava in the back seat.

“I’m honestly not sure. At first I thought she would be, but her reaction was mixed.”

“I’m happy you two are talking more, at least. The first few days after we got back… They were rough.” Camila observed.

“On all of us.” Beatrice replied. “Ava opens up more to me than anyone else, but I can’t say it’s by a lot. The nightmares are bad, they wake me up most nights.”

“Wait, Bea, are you two…” Camila raised her eyebrows. 

“No, no!” Beatrice looked shocked at Camila’s implication. “Well, yes. We have been sleeping together but not  _ sleeping  _ together.”

“Mmm, sure.” Camila gave her a wink.

“Don’t listen to her, Camila. We are straight  _ boning  _ every night.” A sleepy voice from the back seat added, quietly. 

“Ava!” Beatrice was embarrassed but secretly pleased to hear Ava make a joke. She wasn’t naïve though, Beatrice knew that there was turmoil under the surface. One joke wouldn’t magically make that go away. 

“Here, Ava.” Camila passed her a takeaway cup of coffee after she was done laughing. “I added a bunch of cream and sugar, so hopefully you will find it palatable.” 

“Mmm… Thank you, my hero.” Ava took a sip, gratefully, as she sat up in the back seat. 

“You know what, it’s not terrible like this.” Ava added after a few minutes. 

“It’s not exactly healthy, either.” Beatrice felt compelled to tell her. 

“What is these days?” Ava asked, with a smile. 

“So… Where are we going?” Ava wondered, after a blissful few minutes of silence.

“Ava!” Beatrice snapped from the front seat. “Did you listen to Mother Superion at all? Or read the dossier yesterday?”

“Do you want me to lie… Or answer honestly?” Ava sheepishly answered, as Beatrice sighed. 

“We’re going to Monaco!” Camila told Ava, turning around in her seat, eyes shining with excitement. 

“Oh, very fancy. Is that why we packed such formal clothes?”

“Yes. Mother Superion has a lead on some potential demon activity in a casino there.” Beatrice explained, without taking her eyes off the road.

“I’ve never been to a casino…” Ava mumbled.

“They’re not that great, you’re not missing anything.” Camila told her, kindly. 

“Unless you really like alcohol or the patriarchy… Or losing a ton of money for no reason.” Beatrice added, sounding slightly angry at the concept. 

“Well, that’s right up my alley. You obviously don’t know me at all!” Ava smiled, joking. “Can I drive?” 

“Absolutely not.” Beatrice had to laugh at the suggestion, ridiculous as it was. 

On the outskirts of the city, they stopped at a petrol station, to change into their formalwear. After Ava and Camila changed, they stood outside the car, waiting for Beatrice. 

“Alright, Ava. From now on, we aren’t nuns, we are just Spanish socialites here for a good time. Got it?”

“Oh yes, darling.” Ava replied, in an over-the-top and Great Gatsby-esque accent. 

“Nope, too much. Just follow our lead, you’ll be fine. If you don’t know what to say, just act aloof - or like you are better than everyone.” Camila explained, trying to hide her laughter. “Oh! And wear this.” Camila passed her a thin shawl, to wear over her shoulders. Ava was wearing a red, sleeveless cocktail dress. Without the shawl, her scarring would draw too much attention.

“Alright, got it. Thank you, Camila.” Ava thanked her, trying to be more serious and focused on the mission. All of that focus, however, hopped out the window when Beatrice emerged. To Camila’s amusement, Ava’s jaw literally dropped and her face went red. 

“Do I look alright?” Beatrice asked, rejoining them. She wore a surprisingly revealing black cocktail dress. Ava was having trouble breathing or forming a complete thought.

“You look fantastic!” Camila nearly shouted. 

“You as well, sister.” Beatrice replied with a smile. Camila also wore black, although her dress was more modest than Beatrice’s. 

“Ava?” Beatrice asked, as Camila got into the driver’s seat.

“Hmm… What?” Ava felt as though she was malfunctioning. 

“Are you alright?” Beatrice smiled as she spoke, very aware of how Ava felt.

“You… You look really pretty.” Ava choked out.

“You look nice too, Ava.” Beatrice surprised them both by giving Ava a quick kiss before getting back in the car. Ava joined them shortly, still feeling as though she had gone into shock. 

“Alright, Camila’s in charge now.” Camila referred to herself in the third person as she adjusted the seat settings. Following her seat adjustment, she rolled down all of the windows, and turned the radio on. 

“Camila…” Beatrice warned.

“Hey, we have to look the part, right?” Camila questioned, with a smile. 

“I guess… But…” Beatrice trailed off, resigned to Camila’s plan. 

With the radio blasting, they peeled out of the parking lot, way too fast. Wind blew through the car and tousled their hair. To anyone else, they looked like wealthy girls on holiday. What they definitely  _ didn’t  _ look like was a group of elite, highly trained nuns. That would be ridiculous.

Ava gaped out the window as they drove, admiring the beauty of the city. A smile that she couldn’t contain spread across her face, she felt like a normal girl. In her mind, Ava tried to bottle this feeling, so she could experience it again during the bad times. 


	5. Three Nuns Walk into a Casino

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mary has an important conversation while Beatrice, Ava, and Camila are on their mission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if WN doesn't get renewed for season 2 i will legit lose my shit

It was quiet at Shannon’s grave, in the field just outside of Cat’s Cradle. A few gnarled olive trees provided shade for the few dozen headstones, some of which were centuries old. Mary stood, quietly, before sitting down.

“Hey, Shannon.” She began, resting a hand on the newest stone. “I miss you. So much - more than I ever thought I could. Sometimes, it’s not so bad… But then I feel guilty for not missing you enough. Other times… Well, other times it hurts so bad that I’m not sure how I can live another minute… That I’m not sure if I’m breathing anymore.” 

A tear hit the dirt as Mary continued whispering. “ _ God _ , Ava reminds me so much of you lately. I can’t help but wonder sometimes if you two would have gotten along. Maybe it’s a good thing that you never met - the pranks probably would have gotten out of hand.” Mary laughed, as tears coated her face. 

“I hope… I hope wherever you are, that you’re okay. Just know that I am always thinking about you. Always. If you’re looking down on me, on us, please see that we are trying our best. I love you.” As Mary finished speaking, she heard quiet footsteps from behind her.

“Mary?” Lilith asked, standing a respectful distance away, as to not intrude. 

“What’s up?” Mary quickly wiped the tears from her face as she stood up. 

“I…” Lilith struggled to get her sentence out. “I figured I would find you up here. I came to… To apologise.” 

“What?” Whatever Mary had expected Lilith to say, it wasn’t that.

“We used to be good friends, all of us. And then Shannon got the halo and I… Well, I acted poorly. I created a lot of unnecessary drama and tension within our ranks. And then when Ava first…”

“Lilith, stop.” Mary interrupted her. “What you’re saying is true, I won’t lie to you and tell you it’s not. But you, maybe more than anyone, have really stepped up since then. I don’t think I’m exaggerating when I say that we would likely all be dead if it weren’t for you.”

It was Lilith’s turn to be taken aback. “Still, I thought…” 

“I know what you thought. I’m telling you now, though. It’s okay.” Lilith joined Mary next to Shannon’s grave as she spoke. Gently, she rested her hand on top of it. 

“I’m sorry to you too, Shannon. I miss you.” Lilith whispered. Mary put a hand on her shoulder and they shared a rare hug.

“C’mon, let’s go do something fun.” Mary decided, as they walked back. 

“But training…?” Lilith wasn’t exactly the rule-breaking type. 

“Fuck that, one day won’t kill you.” Mary laughed, as Lilith shot her a look for swearing. 

Ava could feel everyone’s eyes on them as they entered the casino. “Why is everyone staring at us?” She whispered. 

“Are you serious?” Beatrice whispered back, as they made their way through the entry hall. Ava detected a hint of amusement in her voice. 

“Yes…?” 

“Three attractive women enter a casino, well-dressed, with no men accompanying them… You do the math, Ava.” Camila was struggling to contain her laughter. 

“Oh…” Ava had never felt this attractive before, but she didn’t hate the attention, either. 

“Ava, don’t you dare. We’re undercover, remember?” Beatrice chastised her just as she was raising her hand to wave at a group of men standing at the bar. 

“Didn’t you hear, though?” Ava smiled at Beatrice. “Camila said I am an  _ attractive woman. _ I’m just giving the people what they want.”

“And she is correct, but we need to keep a low profile. Keep your eyes open, look for anything suspicious.” Beatrice said the first part of her sentence so quickly, Ava almost thought she imagined it. Ava didn’t reply after that. 

“There’s a lot of wraiths in here.” Ava mentioned, quietly, after several minutes.

“Not surprising, this sort of place doesn’t always attract good people.” Beatrice seemed unconcerned.

“Well, are we going to help them?” Ava asked, gesturing towards a group of gamblers who were streaming with red.

“We can’t, it’s too risky. It could blow our cover. I’m sorry, Ava.” Camila was kind, but Ava still felt bad about not being able to help.  _ What is the point of being the halo bearer if I can’t even help people who are being possessed in front of me. Who cares about blowing our cover, we should be helping people!? _

“Camila, have you noticed the VIPs that keep getting escorted to the private room in the back?”

“Yes. Do you think that’s what we are looking for?” Camila replied to Beatrice, while Ava sat there, silently. Sometimes, she couldn’t help but feel stupid when she was around them.

“Ava, do you see anything over there?” Beatrice asked, snapping Ava out of her thoughts. 

“No, but…” She didn’t finish her sentence because she didn’t know how to verbalise her answer.

“But…?” Beatrice sounded concerned, rather than frustrated. 

“Maybe this sounds stupid… But I can  _ feel  _ it. Does that make sense?” Ava finally put a finger on the sinking feeling that she had. 

“It’s not unheard of, halo bearers being able to sense demonic energy.” Camila added, quietly. 

“I understand.” Beatrice placed a hand on Ava’s, providing much needed comfort in the moment. As she did this, Beatrice was also running through several possible ways to gain access to the private room. Obviously, fighting their way in was out of the question.

“Camila, do you remember the floorplan of this building from the dossier?” Beatrice asked, her mind running quickly. 

“Yes… Why? Oh! The exterior wall!” Camila exclaimed, with a smile. 

“Exactly. Ava can phase through for a quick look and tell us what we’re working with.” 

Outside, around the back of the building, they seemed suddenly out of place. Three beautiful young women, huddled in a dirty parking lot, full of less than savoury characters. If the stakes of their mission weren’t so high, it would have been almost comical. 

Ava phased just her face through the wall where Beatrice had indicated, careful to ensure that there were no witnesses. 

“I think it’s a back room, behind the VIP area. No windows, a lot of security features.” Ava was slightly out of breath as she spoke. 

“Are there any filing cabinets, computers, or arcane books about demons?” Camila asked, although the last one was a joke. 

“Computers and cabinets, yes.”

“Ava, do you think you could phase Camila through with you?” Beatrice inquired. “Just as you did with Adriel?”

At the mention of Adriel, Ava’s face dropped for a moment, darkened. If Beatrice hadn’t been watching her, she wouldn’t have even noticed. 

“Yes.” Ava stated, quietly. 

“Oh, that feels kind of awful.” Camila whispered, once they were through the wall.

“Trust me, I know.” Ava replied, darkly. Camila got to work on the computers and Ava guarded the door, ready to phase them back out at short notice. After several anxious minutes, Camila held up her flash drive, indicating she was ready to go. 

“Security is doing a routine sweep of the parking lot, we need to go.” Beatrice whispered, after they had phased back through the wall. “Camila, did you get what we need?”

“Yes, obviously it’s encrypted, but I think I can break it with time.” Once again, Ava was in awe of Beatrice and Camila’s aptitude for this. When they got back to Cat’s Cradle, Ava promised herself that she would work on developing other skills - not just fighting. 

“What are you doing here?” A deep voice boomed from behind them, as they tried to casually walk back to the front of the building. 

“We were just looking for our car, sir.” Beatrice spoke first, smiling at the security guard, her eyes sparkling. 

“This casino is valet only.” He seemed entirely unconvinced.

“Oh my  _ God,  _ you’re right.” Beatrice laughed in a way that Ava had never heard. “I am so  _ stupid.  _ My parents always said, more looks than brains, I guess they were right!”

The security guard sighed and shook his head. “The valet booth is this way, I’ll walk you.” 

“Thank you  _ so  _ much.” Beatrice walked next to the guard, while Camila and Ava followed behind. They were both grinning at each other and trying to contain their laughter. 

“You’re welcome, ma’am. You all look very nice tonight.” His words were stiff and more likely a formality than an actual sentiment. 

“It must be  _ so hard _ to be a security guard. Do you have to beat people up, like, all the time?” Beatrice asked, in a voice that sounded very unlike her. 

“On occasion, some of our VIP visitors are involved in some… Less than legal affairs.” He admitted, without realising. 

“You must be  _ really strong. _ ” As she said it, Beatrice reached out and touched his bicep, just as they reached the valet booth. 

“Here we are.” The guard blushed as he gestured toward his coworker. “I’ll… See you around.” He mumbled, flustered. 

Back in the car, Camila and Ava made it all of a minute before making fun of Beatrice. 

“Oh wow, Camila, you are  _ so strong. _ ” Ava mocked, with her hand on Camila’s shoulder. 

“It’s because I am beating people up just  _ all the time. _ ” Camila replied, laughing. 

“Alright, enough you two.” Beatrice pretended to be angry, but she was laughing along with them as she drove. Oddly, she found undercover work fun sometimes, getting to play a different character. Seeing Ava dressed up, well, that was just an extra bonus. 


	6. A Conversation with God

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava's prayer is answered, sort of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in my head, i have two possible endings for this story. one is happy-ish with some angst. the other is pretty heart shattering sad. i dont know which to choose, so please leave a comment if you have an opinion. cool thanks ilysm

Adriel was bearing down on her as her friend lay dying in the courtyard around them. Quickly, Ava panics, jumping out of the way. He expects this though, anticipates her movement. With expert precision, Adriel turns the Divinium sword against her, running it through Ava’s body. She screams as it pierces through her, creating an unhealable wound. 

Ava wakes up covered in sweat.  _ Just a dream. Again. I should have known.  _ Thankfully, Ava’s nightmares were quiet this time, as Beatrice was still asleep next to her. For a moment, everything seemed calm as Ava looked at her beautiful face, calm in sleep. Unable to fully shake her panic, however, Ava gently slips out of bed and into the hallway. 

Unsure of where to go, at first, Ava wanders the empty hallways of the Cat’s Cradle. A full moon hangs in the air and eerily lights her way. Eventually, she finds her way to the chapel. Ava’s footsteps echoed as she walked through the room, up to the pew in the front. Despite her lack of religious beliefs, she found herself knelt over in prayer. 

_ Hi God. It’s me, Ava. The halo bearer. Although I guess we don’t know if this even is an angel’s halo anymore, do we? I know you and I don’t talk much - or at all. Sorry about that, I can’t say I am a huge believer… Plus, you probably think I am a really big sinner. I guess I am, though. I really am trying though, trying to do right by my sisters and by the OCS. Lately, I kind of just feel like a mess up or a failure… Sorry, this shouldn’t be all about me. Hi God, how are you? How’s your life going? No, that’s stupid. Okay, prayer over. Amen.  _

“I didn’t expect to see you here.” A voice from the back of the chapel interrupted Ava’s prayer.

“Lilith?” Ava guessed, struggling to see in the barely lit room. 

“You got it.” She walked forward to join Ava. The moon reflected against her grey hair made her look both mysteriously beautiful and dangerous. 

“What are you doing up?” Ava asked, although the answer was obvious.

“The same as you, I’d wager.” Lilith sat next to her, with a sad smile. 

“We’re a little messed up, aren’t we?” Ava phrased this as a question, but it was more of a statement. 

“That’s one way of putting it… Sleeping has been hard for me lately.” Lilith admitted to Ava, knowing that she wasn’t alone in that.

“I know. At least I didn’t wake up Beatrice with my screaming and crying tonight.” Ava agreed. 

“I didn’t realise you two were…” 

“We’re not! We haven’t!” Ava was quick to correct her. “We just share a bed, that’s all. And kiss sometimes.” 

“Very romantic.” Lilith smiled, although the look in her eyes was humourless. 

“I love her very much, but… Things have been slightly strained between us since… You know.” 

“I’ve noticed.” Lilith told Ava; it had been obvious. 

“It’s not because we have been fighting, nothing like that. I just… I don’t know, I think she feels conflicted about her vows and being with me. I haven’t exactly been easy to be around, lately, either. It’s like… Lately she only gets the worst parts of me - which isn’t fair to her.” Ava explained, grateful to talk to someone. 

“I understand. If it makes you feel any better, I haven’t been easy to be around either.” Lilith added. 

“I haven’t minded. Actually, I like you better than ever.” Ava smiled slightly.

“Yes, but you’re messed up just like me, so it doesn’t count.” 

“Was that a joke, Lilith?” Ava asked, with the tiniest laugh. 

Lilith sighed, and looked down at her feet. “I go there every night, I see it every night. Yet, I can never get used to it. Somehow, it's always horrible in a new way.” 

“I know what you mean.” Ava told her.

“It’s as if my messed up head decides what part of  _ that place  _ will hurt me the most at any given time. It’s like a sick joke, every night.” A tear escapes Lilith’s eye.

“You’re worried that you’re going to be sent there once you… You know.” Ava asks, knowingly.

“I am. How do you know?” Lilith seemed shocked, but withdrawn. 

“I have the same fear.” Ava admits to her.

They both sat for several minutes, without speaking, lost in their own thoughts. 

“I’m sorry.” Ava apologised, finally breaking the silence. 

“I’m sorry, too.” Lilith replied.

“I’m really grateful that you were with me down there. I wouldn’t have been able to do it on my own. Well, lately it seems I can’t do anything on my own.” Ava told her. 

“You sell yourself short, sometimes.” Lilith replied. “It’s weird though, because being down there with you felt like the right thing to do. As much as Camila likes to paint us as heroes, it really was the right thing to do. We both knew it. But the effect that it’s had… I couldn’t have predicted this.” 

“Would you have still gone?” Ava asked in a whisper. 

“Undoubtedly. You?” Lilith didn’t hesitate for a moment before she answered. 

“I think so. No, I know so.” Ava shook her head. “I know I am not a good Warrior Nun. Anyone else here would have been better. But… I don’t hate it. I like helping people - helping the world. Well… I know I haven’t done that much yet…” 

“Ava, you literally helped save the world from Adriel.” Lilith stated, with a frown. 

“So did you. So did Beatrice, Mary, and Camila. It was a team effort.”

“I know. At the end there… It was up to you. You were brave. The halo was barely charged and you phased into the ice anyway, knowing you could get stuck with Adriel in there.” Lilith whispered, still not meeting Ava’s eyes. 

“I did get stuck, for a moment.” It was the first time Ava admitted it. 

“What?” Lilith asked, finally looking at her.

“I was close to the edge, I could see you fighting. It was only a few inches.” Ava felt her breath catch in her throat as she remembered it. 

“How did you get out?” Lilith asked, her breath stuck in her throat.

“Adriel… He… I don’t know. He put his hand through me…” Ava put a hand on her shoulder blade. “It pushed me out.  _ He  _ pushed me out. I don’t know if he was trying to, or just trying to hurt me, but…”

“You wonder if he pushed you out on purpose, like he knew something that you didn’t?” Lilith guessed.

“Exactly.” 

“I’m sorry. I can understand why that would be haunting you.” 

“The possibility of his return must be haunting you, too.” Ava stated, although it was more of a question. 

“Of course. But…  _ That place  _ leaves a mark on you. Sometimes I feel like my soul has been taken out, ripped up by demons, and then put back. Only now, it’s shattered and broken. 

“Lilith… I’m sorry.” Ava meant it, genuinely. Lilith had described exactly how she felt and Ava wouldn’t have wished the feeling on her worst enemy. 

“Ava, stop apologising.” 

“You know what?” Ava asked, after a brief pause.

“What?” Lilith was wiping the tears from her face as she spoke.

“I wouldn’t wish how I feel on anyone… But at the same time, it’s nice to talk to someone who understands.”

“I know what you mean.” Lilith stood up. “You’re not bad at this, Ava - at being the halo bearer. It’s significantly more of a burden than many realise, my former self included.”

“You’ve changed.” Ava smiled, trying to lighten the mood. 

“More than even I know. I am going to try and get some sleep, so Camila stops leaving baked goods outside my door. I suggest you do the same.” 

“You’re getting baked goods?!” Ava called out, as Lilith turned to walk away. 

“Oh my  _ God. _ ” Lilith whispered. She paused for a moment, before turning back. “And Ava?”

“Yeah?” Ava replied, still sitting in the pew.

“You should talk to Beatrice.”

Ava turned to reply, but Lilith was gone. After taking a deep breath, she got up, and headed back to her room. As gently as possible, Ava crawled back into bed, curling up against Beatrice.

“...Ava?” Beatrice mumbled, still mostly asleep.

“Yes?” Ava asked, angry for rousing Beatrice.

“Where…?” 

“I needed to have a conversation with  _ God. _ ” 

As Ava answered Beatrice’s question, she realised two things. Maybe her prayer had actually been answered, as her conversation with Lilith seemed to be exactly what she had needed. Her second realisation was much simpler - much more innocent. 

_ Beatrice was cute as hell when she’s sleepy. Actually, she is cute all the time. But ESPECIALLY now.  _

“Mmm… Okay. Love you…” Beatrice whispered, her breaths already slowing back down. 

Ava fell asleep with a smile on her face.


	7. Pillow Talk and Data

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beatrice and Ava finally have a conversation. Camila makes an important discovery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, thank you all for the comments on the last chapter. here is what I've decided:
> 
> 1\. I'm going with the happy-ish ending as the canon (as far as this fic goes) ending. There will likely be a 3rd installment, so that's why I mention this.  
> 2\. I will also upload the not happy ending so you can read it if you want  
> 3\. yes, there will be a lot more of this story, before the ending comes. dont worry :)

“Ava?”

“Hmm…?”

“Where did you go last night?” Beatrice’s voice broke through Ava’s mind, waking her up completely. 

“I told you, I needed to have a conversation with  _ God _ .” Ava told her, their faces close together in the warm bed. 

“Ava, seriously. I worry about you.” Beatrice didn’t seem amused, but she was all too aware of their proximity to each other. 

“I… Sorry. I couldn’t sleep and I didn’t want to wake you up. I went for a walk but I ended up running into Lilith.” 

“And…?” Beatrice prompted, wanting Ava to continue. 

“We had a long conversation about how  _ fucked up  _ we are, basically.” Ava whispered.

“Language…” Beatrice quickly added, halfheartedly. 

“Weirdly, it was nice to talk to her - to someone who gets it. Like, I’m not totally alone in this.” Ava admitted, quietly. 

“Ava, you’ve never been alone in this. How many times do I need to tell you?” Beatrice smiled and tucked Ava’s messy hair behind her ear.

“Beatrice, can I be serious for a second?” Ava’s face remained neutral.

“Of course.”

“I know things have been… Less than ideal between us, since we got back. I’m sorry. I feel like it’s my fault. Actually, it is my fault.”

“Ava -”

“Seriously. Sometimes I wonder how I can be so selfish. You are beyond good to me, you care about me more than anyone ever has. Yet, lately you only get to see the worst parts of me. And I know that you are struggling with your vows and our  _ relationship…  _ Which I haven’t helped with at all, because I  _ suck.  _ You are an amazing woman, beyond amazing. You deserve better than this garbage fire.”

Ava turned around after she was done rambling, to stare at the wall. She couldn’t bear to see Beatrice’s face after what she just said. 

“I don’t think you suck and you’re definitely not… As you put it, a  _ garbage fire. _ ” Beatrice whispered, after a few moments of silence. Ava didn’t reply, nor did she turn around. 

“My entire life, my parents and those close to me told me that what I was - am - was wrong. That I was  _ wrong.  _ Catholic boarding school followed and then I took my vows and entered the OCS. Every achievement, award, accolade - none of it was enough to outweigh my inherent  _ wrongness.  _ Those who were supposed to love me, my family, members of the church…” 

Beatrice felt tears sting her eyes as Ava turned back around. “You’re not wrong, Beatrice. You’re never wrong, you’ve never  _ been _ wrong.” She held each other Beatrice’s hands in her own as she spoke.

“Ava, being with you doesn’t make me feel like that.” 

“It doesn’t?” Ava’s voice was a hoarse whisper, she hated seeing Beatrice cry.

“I’ve analysed it in my head a thousand times. Is it because I’m not actually wrong? Or is it because I’m  _ so wrong  _ and my parents were right all along? Maybe I’m so flawed as a person that I am not even aware of it!” Beatrice’s voice cracked as she explained. 

“There is nothing wrong with you.” Ava stated, squeezing Beatrice’s hands in her own.

“We’re all a little messed up around here.” Beatrice smiled with tears in her eyes.

“Welcome to the club. But Beatrice…” Ava trailed off for a moment, trying to gain the courage to say what she needed to say. “If it would… Help you… We could not do  _ this  _ anymore…?

“Not share a bed?” For once, Beatrice found herself unsure of Ava’s meaning. 

“No. Like… Not be together…  _ At all. _ ” Ava choked out the words slowly. 

“Oh…” Beatrice looked down, suddenly unable to meet Ava’s gaze. “Do you not want to be…?”

“Are you kidding me?” Ava shouted. “Beatrice when I’m around you, I feel like I can do anything - handle anything. Everyone keeps telling me that I was the one who  _ saved the world,  _ but it wasn’t me. It was  _ you.  _ If it weren’t for you, I’d likely already be dead. Again. You push me,  _ and the halo,  _ further than I would ever be able to go alone. And I know, for a fact, that the halo likes you too. It hums when you’re close…” Ava took a deep breath after her tirade. 

“Is that really how you feel?” Beatrice whispered, her cheeks were flushed as tears streaked down them. 

“It is. But if being with me, if being together, causes you pain… Well, then I would give it up. For you.” Ava told her, with a serious look in her eyes. 

“Well…” Beatrice began, with a smile creeping across her face. “Maybe it’s time I push past my personal pain.” Ava returned the smile, remembering when they sat together at ArqTech, reading Sister Melanie’s entry in the diary. 

Ava was quiet for a moment, before jumping up and enveloping Beatrice into a massive hug - tangling them both in blankets. “I’m really glad to hear you say that.” 

“Me too.” Beatrice laughed, genuinely. “But we should go get breakfast, or we’ll miss it.”

“Oh, yes!” Ava was out of bed in a moment, upon realising her hunger. 

At breakfast, the mood was lighter than it had been since the sisters returned from their battle with Adriel. Mary smiled when she saw Ava and Beatrice enter the dining room, they walked hand in hand. Once she sat down, Ava offered Lilith a small smile, which was promptly returned. Camila had a laptop open next to her plate, as she worked on decrypting the data they had retrieved from the casino. 

“Any luck yet?” Mary asked Camila as they ate. 

“No, but I’m close.” Camila replied, without looking up. 

“Do you want help later? A second set of eyes?” Beatrice offered, watching Camila work with interest.

“Yes, please.” Camila looked up from her work, smiling.

“For the non computer geniuses among us, does anyone want to train with me?” Ava asked, with a laugh.

“I will, but you  _ need  _ to start drilling weapons skills. We’ve done enough hand-to-hand combat for a while.” Lilith added, earning herself a groan from Ava. While her fighting skills had improved considerably, her weapon skills had not. 

“Oh, I am so there for this.” Mary chuckled. “Seeing Ava on the range is always…  _ Interesting. _ ”

“Hey! It’s not that bad!” Ava defended herself, unconvincingly. 

“It’s bad.” Lilith agreed with Mary. 

Several hours later, Ava found herself standing in the heat, uncomfortably shouldering a rifle. 

“Ava, it’s not that hard. Focus, breathe, hit the target.” Mary told her, from behind. Ava did as she was told, finally making connection with the target. 

“Yes! Finally!” Ava yelled, setting the gun down, awkwardly.

“Alright, she hit the target once, we can stop practicing now, Lilith.” They both laughed at Ava’s pouting face. 

Beatrice ran across Cat’s Cradle to join them, the hot sun burning her skin after several hours in the cool library. 

“Sorry to interrupt,” She told her sisters, still out of breath. “Mother Superion’s office, now. We found something.” 

Camila was already there when they arrived. Her face was uncharacteristically drawn, she looked more nervous than Ava had ever seen.

“Firstly, there was a lot of non-demon illegal activity. It implicates several wealthy and powerful people across Europe.” Camila began, sliding a thick envelope across the desk to Mother Superion.

“Thank you, Camila. I’ll see what I can do about getting these to Interpol.” 

“Obviously, there was no document on the computer at the casino entitled  _ Our Evil Plan 101: Summoning Demons. _ But, there were several references to rituals - rituals that haven’t been practiced for centuries. There are some translations and accounts… Bea helped me translate.” Camila explained.

“Politics are layered, complicated. There is an above-board level, where elected officials hold meetings and pass legislation. A layer below that, corporations and wealthy benefactors use their capital to influence that legislation. Far beyond the obvious, however, there are networks of well-connected and well-funded individuals that want to change the entire political landscape for their own gain.” Beatrice began, displaying an incredible understanding of the topic.

No one spoke or asked any questions, so she continued. “These types of…  _ Shadow networks  _ have existed for millenia, worldwide. Not always in the same form, mind you. If we can confirm what Camila managed to scrub from the data… We would have proof that  _ someone  _ is summoning not only wraiths, but higher order demons, to influence the global political landscape.”

Beatrice’s words hung heavy in the air. “I trust you can all see why this would concern us, correct?” Mother Superion asked.

“Yes, but what are we going to  _ do  _ about it?” Mary replied, seemingly always ready for action. 

“I haven’t been able to find any locations or individuals within the data… Yet.” Camila admitted. “But it is possible, with more time.”

“Very well.” Mother Superion praised Camila, who smiled. “For now, continue training, but be ready to go. We need to maintain secrecy about this, since we don’t know who could be involved. Our utmost discretion is required if we want to keep not only our involvement, but the OCS, a secret. Do you understand?” She seemed to focus on Ava as she spoke, pointedly. 

“How can we fight these demons if we have to keep everything secret?” Ava wondered, feeling slightly offended at Mother Superion’s look. 

“We have a few different options, each of which depends on the data the Camila is hopefully able to dig up.” Mother Superion added, with a hopeful look at Camila. 

“Thank you for informing us of this development.” Lilith thanked her, formally.

“You’re welcome. You are dismissed, for now. Camila, please continue working on the data recovery. Mary, Lilith, and Ava, please return to training. But no more guns today, please.” She added the last part while rubbing her head. “Beatrice, please stay behind for a moment.” Beatrice’s face looked both stunned and worried. Ava gave her a sympathetic look as she left the room. 

“How may I be of assistance?” Beatrice asked, standing at attention, once her sisters had left the room. 

“The implications of this information, it’s not impossible that -” 

“That my parents could be involved.” Beatrice interrupted.

“Yes.” Mother Superion sighed.

“I have considered the possibility.” Beatrice looked at the floor. “I hope, for their sake, that they are not. Unfortunately, knowing them, I’m aware that it’s not out of the realm of possibility.”

“I trust that, should it come down to it…?” Mother Superion began.

“I’ll do what I need to.” Beatrice answered, darkly. 


	8. Silence.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beatrice and Ava go on a mission, chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do you honestly think i would write this much WN fanfic if i was STRAIGHT?

“I’m scared of the airplane…” Ava whispers in Beatrice’s ear as they stand alongside the runway. 

“Are you really?” Beatrice was slightly taken aback. 

“Yes. I know, it’s embarrassing.” 

“No, it’s not embarrassing. I’m just surprised, that given the nature of this mission, that  _ the plane  _ is what you are scared of.” Beatrice explained, kindly. 

“I’m scared of other things, too. I’m excited about some of it.” Ava told her, honestly.

“Let’s focus on the positive, what are you excited for?” 

“My fighting has gotten a lot better and this will likely be my first chance to put it to the test. Plus…” Ava trailed off, suddenly shy. 

“Plus what, Ava?” Beatrice was curious. 

“When we fought…  _ Him…  _ I remember thinking to myself about how much I wanted to travel. To see more… To see more with you.” Ava admitted, finally. 

“I don’t want to burst your bubble, but there isn’t going to be that much to see.” Beatrice smiled.

“Why not? We’re going to Russia! That’s super cool!” Ava was excited. 

“We’re going to  _ Siberia.  _ It’s mostly going to be snow, ice, and bears.” Beatrice told her, sad that she had to ruin Ava’s excitement. 

“SNOW?!?!” Ava jumped in the air. “I’ve never seen snow!” Beatrice couldn’t help but laugh. For a moment, she felt the tension in her shoulders relax. 

Finally, the cargo plane they were waiting for arrived, and Ava and Beatrice climbed into the back. “Why can’t we fly like normal people?” Ava asked, once they were settled among some boxes. 

“If Duretti is involved, which I highly suspect he is, he will have people looking for us. Travelling through a public airport would likely alert him. Mother Superion thought it wasn’t worth the risk. I agree.” Beatrice told Ava.

“Oh, okay.” Ava didn’t make a joke, or say anything else. 

“Do you want me to tell you the important parts of the dossier, or do you want to read it yourself?” Beatrice inquired, kindly. 

“I… Will you tell me?” Ava was capable of reading the document herself, but the OCS formal reports were boring as anything. Plus, Ava loved hearing Beatrice’s voice.

“Okay. According to the data Camila found, we’re headed to a small village. The influential people who are part of this… Well, they don’t do their own dirty work. They hire it out.” Beatrice began, explaining. 

“Hired goons, in a rural location, to avoid suspicion? That makes sense.” Ava replied. 

“See? You understand this. Apparently, sometime soon, these hired men are going to attempt one of the rituals that Camila and I researched. We really don’t want that to happen.”

“Beatrice? Are we going to have to kill them?” Ava was suddenly concerned, any trace of levity gone from her face. 

“Hopefully not. It is a possibility though, I won’t lie to you.” Beatrice whispered, almost wishing she hadn’t. The look on Ava’s face as she spoke made her feel as though her heart was getting crushed. 

Ava didn’t speak or look at Beatrice for an hour after that, a painfully long hour. “Are people going to look at us weird when we climb out of a  _ cargo plane?”  _

“We will be… Exiting the aircraft before landing.” Beatrice said, with a mischievous smile. She was grateful that Ava was speaking again. 

“Are we…?” Ava didn’t finish her sentence, her eyes wide.

Beatrice stood in the snow, her ears ringing. Ava had screamed the entire way down, which temporarily deafened her. 

“Was the yelling really necessary?” She called to Ava, who was playing in a snowpile nearby.

“Yes. We jumped out of a plane, that’s crazy.” Ava laughed. “You know what else is necessary?”

“What?” Beatrice asked, slightly nervous. 

“This!” Ava yelled, throwing a snowball at her. Beatrice kicked it out of the air before impact, rather impressively. Despite her still ringing ear, it was nice to see Ava experience things for the first time. 

“I thought we were going to a village?” Ava wondered, as they walked along the snowy, desolate road.

“We are. It would have been suspicious and odd if we parachuted right into it though. It’s about a mile up the road.” Beatrice told her as her boots crunched through the snow. She sighed, thinking about how Mary and Lilith were sent to rural Spain for their mission, while her and Ava had to truck through the snow. Camila was probably drinking a cup of tea by the library window, going through the last of the data. Still, Beatrice was happy she and Ava got to be together. 

“Beatrice, maybe this is a dumb question, but how are we getting back? I don’t think this town has an airfield.” 

“Mother Superion arranged a car for us, on the outskirts of town. We’ll need to make a little bit of a drive to catch a ride back.” Beatrice explained.

“Oh. Okay. Cool. Can I drive?” Ava asked.

“The answer’s still no.” Beatrice laughed. 

They walked on, silently, for a while. As they trudged along the barely plowed road, Ava had wound her hand around Beatrice’s. Despite what Beatrice said about the area earlier, she was seeing new beauty in it. Maybe Ava’s admiration of everything was rubbing off on her. Or, was it possible that she had changed? Beatrice was pulled from her thoughts when Ava suddenly stopped walking. 

“We’re too late.” Ava murmured, eyes wide.

“What? How do you know?” Beatrice asked, feeling the panic rise through her. 

“There.” Ava pointed to a field, off the side of the road. There were four men, standing in a circle, in the distance. Only Ava could see the wraiths that spun above them. 

Beatrice and Ava ran across the snowy field, forging their own path through the snow. Unfortunately, the subtle option was no longer available, a fact which Beatrice lamented. Still, four men and some wraith demons would be an easy fight. 

With a deafening and otherworldly cracking noise, a gnarled arm emerged from under the snow. A demon’s arm. The snow surrounding it quickly melted away, as the air filled with the smell of burning sulphur. Shouts filled the air as the men surrounding the demon began to freak out. Rightfully so, as a massive demon was quickly pushing its way out of the ground. 

As the demon stood up fully, Ava recognised it from her journey with Lilith. It was  _ at least  _ double the size of a Tarask, with a large set of claws to match. She set her jaw as she ran forward, trying to push the memories of  _ Hell  _ out of her mind - trying to focus on the battle in front of her.

Wraiths streak above Ava and Beatrice, almost as if they too are fleeing the demon. The four men are left, although the demon picks one of them from the ground, crushing him into nothing within moments. Exchanging a look of terror, the three remaining men turn to run away.  _ We’re not going to make it in time. _

Beatrice dislodged a knife from her belt as she, throwing it with expert precision into the demon’s head. Turning away from the hired men, the demon focused its attention on Beatrice. Ava felt her blood run cold, as the demon began to charge them. Beatrice had been a few steps ahead of her, but Ava used the halo’s power to close the distance. In the seconds before the demon made contact, Ava grabbed Beatrice, phasing them both the demon. 

“Nice save.” Beatrice told her, seemingly unphased, as she stood up. The demon seemed confused, as it turned around, looking for them. For the moment, the stunned men made an easier target, as they were too scared to move. In an instance, they were reduced to a bloody pile, quickly staining the snow. Ava felt a guilty tear slide down her cheek. 

With the easy fodder dispatched, the demon turned back to Ava and Beatrice. “In this life or the next, Ava.” Beatrice whispered, pulling two more knives from her belt. 

“In this life or the next.” Ava drew the Divinium sword as she spoke. 

Ava had barely taken two steps forward when the demon took a knife to the eye.  _ Jesus, Beatrice is fast.  _ A hellish howling noise filled the air as the demon lamented its sudden wound. Ava took the opportunity to charge, holding the glowing Divinium sword more confidently than she had in the past. 

In an elegant dance, Beatrice and Ava moved around the demon, careful to avoid its flailing limbs. It was powerful, undoubtedly, but also stupid. This worked to their advantage, or it did, until Ava misstepped, accidentally putting herself in the path of the demon’s swinging arm. 

Unsurprisingly, it hit like a truck. What hurt worse, however, was seeing Beatrice get hit a moment later. Upon impact, Beatrice slid several feet across the snow, and didn’t get up immediately. Ava could feel the halo inside her now, welling up with energy. 

Across the field, Beatrice slowly stood up, her head ringing from the impact. Quickly, she took inventory, noting that nothing was broken - only bruised. Upon turning back the battle, Beatrice saw Ava rising into the air, propelled by the halo once more. Ava’s scream filled the air, the sound mingling with the demon’s roars. It was truly a hellish cacophony. 

As the golden shockwave ripped through the air, Beatrice was careful to take cover, the icy wind burning her exposed skin. 

“Ava?!” She yelled, as the demon was forced back to  _ Hell  _ in a murderous rage. “AVA?!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Ava whispered, as tears fell from her eyes. The halo’s blast had knocked her into the bodies of the hired men. Exhausted from the blast, Ava was unable to immediately escape the bloody mess.  _ More blood on my hands. I’m sorry.  _

It started to snow when Beatrice found Ava, nearly catatonic, covered in blood and tears. 

“Ava? Are you alright?” Beatrice asked, pulling her into a standing position. Ava stared at her hands, which were shaking, and didn’t answer. 

“Hey, look at me.” Beatrice had both her hands on Ava’s shoulders, forcing eye contact between them. Ava met Beatrice’s eyes, but still didn’t speak. Sighing heavily, Beatrice grabbed one of Ava’s bloody hands, walking her back to the road. 

It took them twelve hours to get back to the Cat’s Cradle. Despite Beatrice’s best efforts, Ava didn’t say a word the entire time.


	9. Guilt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava deals with her guilt, Camila makes cupcakes, and Mary convinces the group to go on ~their most dangerous mission yet~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im really excited to write the chapter that will come after this one

“How long has it been?” Mary asked Beatrice in a whisper, outside of Ava’s closed bedroom door.

“18 hours.” Beatrice’s answer was short, precise. 

“What are we going to do?” Camila’s eyes were wide with worry.

“Can I talk to her?” Lilith drew several looks with her question. No one objected, though, so Lilith entered the room, alone.

“Ava?” Lilith knelt before her, putting a hand on Ava’s knee. She was sitting on the edge of her bed, silent and still. Lilith didn’t get a response, unsurprisingly.

“I thought you might want to…” Lilith struggled to find the right words. “I thought it might help to talk to someone who is as  _ messed up  _ as you.” 

“My fault.” Ava’s voice was hoarse and barely audible. She didn’t look at Lilith as she spoke.

“Ava, what happened was  _ not  _ your fault. From what Beatrice said, it sounds like you did incredibly well.”

“Not well enough… Died… My fault.” Ava spoke in sentence fragments, almost as disjointed as her thoughts.

“Perhaps this sounds harsh, but those men knew the risks of their actions. They had been involved in illegal affairs for over a decade…” Lilith trailed off, unsure if she was making a convincing argument or not.

“Didn’t deserve to  _ die _ …” Ava looked at Lilith, her eyes were glassy - a world away.

“Likely not. But playing games with the devil doesn’t usually end happily.”

“Maybe you’re right…” 

“Come with me, let’s go get you cleaned up.” Lilith gently took Ava’s hand, leading her to the hallway bathroom. Thankfully, the crowd outside the door had dispersed for the moment. 

_ What have I become?  _ Ava thought to herself, as the caked on blood and dirt washed down the shower drain.  _ Am I completely mental now? Maybe Lilith is right, maybe she isn’t, but I can’t shake the feeling that this is my fault. Again. I don’t even think that I could count the amount of deaths I’ve caused. Is this the burden of the halo? I’m the only one with the power to protect the world from demons, but they still end up killing people?  _

At the realisation, Ava choked out a sob. “Ava, are you alright?” Lilith called. She was waiting outside, just in case.

“Yes. Sorry.” A small voice replied, from the shower. Lilith sighed, the gears in her mind turning faster than she was comfortable with. 

After drying off and getting dressed, Ava steadied herself, and stepped back into the hallway. Lilith was still there, waiting patiently. 

“I’m sorry.” Ava apologised, quickly.

“Why?” Lilith asked.

“I don’t know. For being…  _ Fucked up. _ ” Ava whispered.

“I don’t think I need to remind you that this is a house of  _ God. _ But I think he would understand the circumstances and grant you an exception.” Lilith offered Ava a small smile as she spoke.

“Thank you. If I travelled back in time and told myself you and I became friends, I would have laughed. Or been terrified…”Ava’s temperament lightened as she imagined it. 

“I feel the same way.” Lilith replied. “Try not to mess it up though, alright?” She added, with a quiet laugh.

“No promises.” Ava jokes back, although her mind is still on the dead men and the demon.

“Dinner is in an hour, just so you know. And I think Camila has some baked goods headed your way, as well.” Lilith told Ava, as she retreated down the hallway.

“Thanks.” Ava called, halfheartedly, as she headed back towards her own room. 

Upon opening the door, Ava saw Beatrice waiting, standing awkwardly by the window.

“Ava?” She asked, mentally begging Ava to talk to her.

“That’s me.” Ava replied, quietly. 

Usually, when Beatrice touches Ava, it’s gentle and precise - calculated. On this occasion, however, her hug was like being hit by a bus. It was messy and clumsy, without a hint of Beatrice’s normal grace. On impact, Ava wasn’t even sure how Beatrice crossed the room so fast.

“Are you okay?” Ava whispered, still entwined in Beatrice’s embrace.

“I’m worried about you…” Beatrice paused for a moment. “Ava, I can feel it.”

“Feel what?” Ava breathed, intoxicated by the extended contact with Beatrice.

“The halo.” Beatrice opened her eyes, noticing the entire room was illuminated with gold.

“I told you, it likes you.” Ava said, as they finally broke apart. Beatrice walked over to sit on the bed and Ava joined her. 

“You really scared me back there.” Beatrice told her, after several moments of silence.

“I know. I’m sorry.” Ava felt beyond guilty.

“What was going through your mind, Ava?” Beatrice asked as she held Ava’s shaking hands in her own. 

“I… It’s not easy to sort out in my brain… It’s not just one thought exactly… It’s more like a bunch of flashes, all happening at the same time. I was overwhelmed by it.” Ava began trying to explain what she had been experiencing. 

“For a moment, when we were there…” Ava continued, Beatrice’s firm presence giving her strength. “I couldn’t separate reality from what I was seeing in my head. I wasn’t sure if it was a nightmare or really happening. I was perceiving it as a… Mix of both, I guess.” Explaining it to Beatrice was weirdly calming to Ava, cathartic even. 

“I couldn’t help but feel like it was my fault… I guess it was my fault. How many people have died because of me, Beatrice?” Ava asked, her eyes burning with the threat of tears. 

“Ava, you did phenomenally on our mission. Your combat skills, while lacking refinement, having improved significantly. You also used the halo to send a  _ higher order demon  _ back to  _ Hell. _ Camila said she has only seen two accounts of that happening in all of her research.”

Ava blushed under the weight of Beatrice’s compliments, although they did nothing to alleviate her guilt. “Those men are dead because I couldn’t act fast enough, Beatrice. Why doesn’t anyone see that?” 

“Ava, they were grown men who got into stuff that they were not equipped to handle. Your job… Your responsibility as halo bearer is to, before anything else, protect our realm from demons. What happened is truly unfortunate and I won’t try to convince you that they deserved it, because they didn’t.” Beatrice’s words, as always, were carefully chosen.

“You don’t think I failed?” Ava asked, in a whisper. 

“I never have.” Beatrice answered, with the utmost confidence. 

Several minutes later, a knock on the door interrupted what had, only moments ago, been an intense moment between Ava and Beatrice. With a startled cough, Beatrice retrieved Ava’s shirt from the floor.

“Come in.” Ava called, awkwardly, the moment after she had gotten her shirt back on. Camila entered the room, holding a tray. The look on her face, huge smile and wide eyes, made it obvious that she had figured out what was going on. 

“I made cupcakes!” Camila sang.

“Cupcakes!” Ava echoed, excited. Beatrice put her head in her hands and signed. She wondered if being with Ava would ever stop giving her emotional whiplash. Beatrice wondered how Ava could switch gears to cupcakes so quickly, when her mind was still preoccupied on Ava’s shirtless form. She felt her cheeks burn with the thought. With a deep breath and a shockingly disciplined mind, she forced the thought away. For now.

“Oh my  _ God _ , Camila these are delicious.” Ava had frosting all over her face as she spoke. “You should quit this whole OCS business and open a bakery.  _ Seriously. _ ”

“They’re not  _ that  _ good.” Camila replied, secretly delighted that Ava was speaking again. 

“I don’t know, Camila. They’re pretty good.” Beatrice added, as she ate, looking a lot more refined than Ava did. 

_ It’s nice to have a family.  _

At dinner, the mood was lighter, although Ava could feel concerned glances from her sisters when they thought she wasn’t looking. Everyone seemed to be avoiding talking about demons or missions, a fact that Ava was grateful for. It was inevitable that they would have another mission, eventually, but for now Ava was happy to live in denial.

“We should go out tonight.” Mary said resolutely, a total non sequitur from the conversation that had been taking place.

“Out?” Beatrice asked, confused at Mary’s meaning.

“You know, like young people do. Dance a little, eat some food, take some shots.” Mary explained, with a chuckle.

“Oh…” Beatrice seemed unsure.

“I’m in.” Lilith stated, surprisingly. 

“Wow, Lilith herself agrees to a night out. These truly are strange times.” 

“I want to go too!” Camila added. “But I’m wearing my hawaiian shirt.” This earned her a collective groan.

“I’ll go if Beatrice comes.” Ava said, with a mischievous smile. 

“Unsurprising.” Mary laughs to herself. 

  
All eyes were on Beatrice. “Okay, okay. I’ll go.” She acquiesced under the pressure. Secretly, however, she was excited for another opportunity to live like a  _ normal  _ person. It would be another chance for her to reclaim experiences that she had missed out on in her youth. 


	10. Slizzard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The sisters hit the club, antics ensue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this didn't go the direction i had originally planned, it just felt too artificial. hopefully yall still enjoy reading. xoxo - gossip girl

Beatrice could feel the heavy bass from the speakers drumming in her chest. Either that, or her heart was freaking out at her proximity to Ava. It was a humid night, and even though the club had huge windows that opened up to the ocean, the outside air did little to cool her down. 

“Do you want to dance with me?” Ava asked, over the pounding of the music. The other sisters had already hit the dance floor, moving with a confidence that Beatrice felt she lacked. 

“I don’t… I don’t know how to dance.” Beatrice admitted, embarrassed. 

“Me neither!” Ava looked at her, eyes bright. “But in the movies, they just kind of just… Jump around. So I’m going to do that!” 

Ava didn’t give Beatrice a chance to reply, dragging her to the dance floor. Awkwardly, Beatrice bobbed side to side, as Ava and Camila jumped and spun around. Lilith and Mary were dancing, more reservedly and to the side, laughing hysterically at Ava and Camila. Once again, Beatrice felt like the odd one out - like the one person in the group who didn’t get the joke. 

After a song or two, Mary headed to the bar, gesturing for everyone to join her. Once the sisters had gathered, Mary began to speak.

“We never really celebrated when we  _ literally saved the world,  _ but now is as good a time as any!” Mary told them, brandishing a tray of shots, delivered by a tired looking bartender. 

“I’ll drink to that.” Lilith added, her calmness an odd juxtaposition against the party around them.

Beatrice quickly found herself standing there, a shot in each hand, while her sisters eagerly looked on. “This feels like peer pressure.” Beatrice mumbled.

“It is, baby.” Mary chuckled. 

“You know us nuns, famous for their party  _ habits _ !” Camila added, with a smile.

“Good one, Camila!” Ava encouraged her with a giggle. Beatrice couldn’t help but laugh. 

With her quintessential grace, Beatrice quickly took one shot, then the other. This garnered a cheer of support from her sisters. A cheer that turned into a roaring laugh when the taste hit her. 

“Oh  _ God,  _ what is that?” Beatrice felt the alcohol burn its way into her stomach. 

“It’s vodka, buddy.” Mary said, clapping Beatrice on the back as she walked back towards the dance floor. 

“I don’t know how you do it, but even taking shots, you look so… Refined.” Ava whispered, joining Beatrice’s side as the rest of the sisters hit the dance floor. 

“I don’t feel  _ refined. _ ” Beatrice felt slightly angry. Not at her sisters, but because she shouldn’t feel so awkward and out of place in these situations. She was a young and attractive woman, this shouldn’t feel so foreign to her. 

“Beatrice?” Ava asked, gently grabbing Beatrice’s arm and snapping her from her thoughts. With a start, Beatrice realised that this must be, at least somewhat, how Ava feels about everything.

“What? Sorry.” Beatrice mumbled, thrown off by the sudden epiphany. 

“Don’t apologise. What’s wrong?” Ava questioned, concern was knitted through her words. 

“I hate how awkward I feel. I’m young… I’m not ugly… It shouldn’t feel so foreign to go out with my friends. But yet, it is.” Beatrice could feel the alcohol hitting her as she spoke.

“You’re more than just  _ not ugly,  _ Beatrice. I understand how you feel and I’m sorry. It sucks.” Ava didn’t try to minimise how Beatrice felt, nor did she laugh at her awkwardness. For that, Beatrice was grateful. 

“Ava, for someone who grew up… Like you did... You have a surprisingly adept emotional compass.” Beatrice complimented. 

“Yes, I am amazing, I know. Very good at modesty, too.” Ava smiled, grabbing Beatrice’s hands in her own. 

“That… Okay.” Beatrice was about to correct her, but didn’t, laughing instead. 

“Can we try dancing again?” Ava asked, a look of longing in her eyes. 

“I suppose, maybe the vodka makes it easier.” Beatrice followed Ava back out on the sweaty dance floor. 

“That’s literally the point!” Ava told her, loudly, over the music. 

Beatrice’s second trip to the dance floor turned out better than the first. She felt looser, more free, and danced around Ava accordingly. Ava, who had never been as rigid in the first place, bounced all over the place, taking a turn dancing with each of her sisters. 

“Hi Camila!” Ava exclaimed, as she shared a song with her. 

“Hi!” Camila replied, as they both did a strange, or at least Beatrice thought so, jumpy dance to the techno song that blasted through the club. 

“You know what, Camila?” Ava asked, with a heavy hand on Camila’s shoulder. “I like the hawaiian shirt, don’t listen to Mary and Lilith.” 

“Enough talking shit, you two.” Mary interrupted, powerfully, from behind them.

“Mary!” Ava and Camila yelled together, obviously a bit under the influence. 

“Mary,” Ava began, wagging a finger at her. “Need I remind you that this is a house of  _ God  _ and you shouldn’t say swear words?”

“Ava, this is a nightclub. This is the exact opposite of a house of  _ God. _ ” Mary replied with a grin. 

“Oh, yeah!” Ava danced around Mary as she answered. Surprisingly, at least to Beatrice, Mary danced with Ava for a song or two, before pushing her off onto Lilith with a laugh. Beatrice felt light - happy, seeing her sisters enjoying themselves. 

“Ava, you are drunk.” Lilith said, catching Ava from Mary’s push.

“No, you’re drunk.” Ava replied, poking Lilith in the nose. 

“You are going to regret that at training tomorrow.” Lilith threatened, lightheartedly. 

“Probably!” Ava agreed, while grabbing each of Lilith’s hands, swinging them about. It was an odd little jig, Beatrice thought, between two enemies turned friends.

Finally, Ava returned to Beatrice, sweaty and out of breath. “Hi. I brought you another drink.” Ava panted as she handed Beatrice a shot glass.

“Are you ready to dance now, party animal?” Beatrice asked, with a smile.

“First, we drink!” Ava clinked her glass against Beatrice’s, making an adorable face as she drank it. At least, Beatrice thought it was adorable. 

Plenty of times, in life, it seems as though the whole world is against you. There are rare instances, however, where everything seems to go your way. Later, Beatrice would learn that this particular instance was not the universe, but rather Mary making a well-timed request of the DJ. 

Beatrice had been plenty prepared to do whatever crazy dance Ava wanted, but she hadn’t been prepared for that dance to be a slow one. Their eyes met, as the song changed to a slow ballad, immediately affecting the atmosphere of the entire building. 

“You are evil.” Lilith laughed, to the returning Mary. 

“I know, but man, I can’t resist.” Mary replied. 

“Ugh, I love this!” Camila added, the drunkest of the three of them. 

Awkwardly, Ava put her hands around Beatrice’s waist, the way she had seen couples do in movies.  _ Yup, this is fine. Everything is fine. Don’t freak out.  _ The alcohol had not been enough to blunt Ava’s internal panic. 

“This is nice.” Ava whispered in Beatrice’s ear, after they settled in a swaying motion. Their bodies were pressed together, hungrily, as they slowly danced. 

“I agree.” Beatrice replied. “I think I’m drunk, though.” 

“Well, you would have fooled me, and I’m one hundred percent sober.” Ava laughed, secretly admiring Beatrice’s ability to stay put together. 

“I’m sure you are, Ava.” Beatrice added, with a smile. In this moment, she felt freer and more herself than she had in a long time - maybe ever. In her mind, Ava was the only one in the room, everyone else had fallen away. Everything had fallen away. It was just  _ Ava. _

Sunlight poured through the windows, as Beatrice awoke with a start the next morning, alone in Ava’s bed. She moved to sit up, but her head pounded. Looking to the bedside table, she saw a glass of water and a note, along with two painkillers. In scratchy, messy handwriting, Ava had left her a message. 

_ B, _

_ You got hella slizzard last night, I couldn’t wake you up for training. Sorry, don’t be mad.  _

_ Love, A. _

“What does slizzard mean?” Beatrice wondered aloud, as she painstakingly changed into her training clothes. Walking down the hallway, Beatrice rubbed her head, hoping the drugs would kick in soon. Otherwise, it was going to be a long day. 

Stepping out into the hot and harsh sunlight made Beatrice feel as though her stomach would leave her body. She stopped for a moment, and thankfully, the feeling passed. In the courtyard, she could see her sisters sparring, although Camila ran to her open computer between rounds. With a smile, wondering if they felt as awful as she did, Beatrice began the long walk through the sun, only to be stopped by a firm hand on her shoulder. 

“Beatrice.” Mother Superion said, from behind her. Only now could Beatrice see Ava, gesticulating wildly, probably to warn her of Mother Superion’s presence. Too late. 

“Mother Superion.” Beatrice replied, turning to her, hoping she didn’t look as bad as she felt. 

“I heard you went out last night.” 

“I…” Beatrice stuttered, her head felt like it was stuffed with cotton. 

“If it was anyone else, they would be in trouble. You’ve earned it, though. All of you.” Mother Superion said, with a smile. Beatrice was stunned. 

“We just… I... “ Again, she couldn’t seem to string together a full sentence, still shocked by the leniency. 

“I still expect you to make it through a full day of training, of course.” Mother Superion finished, with a slightly evil smile. Beatrice rejoined her friends, preparing to be laughed at. In an odd way, she knew she wouldn’t mind. 


	11. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Camila finally cracks the encryption of the data from the casino, although the implications are more than the sisters expected. Beatrice is forced to confront a problem that she would have been much happier to ignore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my parents rescued a 'yellow lab mutt' in february, but it turns out shes half coyote. isnt that wild?

“No offense, Beatrice, but you have definitely looked better.” Ava laughed while she stretched for training. 

“You drank just as much as I did, if not more, how are you fine?” Beatrice felt like her mind was running much slower than usual as she spoke. 

“I have…” Ava wiggled her fingers. “Magic powers.” Beatrice groaned and turned to Mary and Lilith.

“Don’t look at me, I also have  _ magic powers. _ ” Lilith imitated Ava, albeit more deadpan.

“You’ve never been hungover, have you?” Mary asked, with an amused look on her face. 

“Is it that obvious?” Beatrice replied, slightly embarrassed. 

“Yeah, kind of. It’s a right of passage though. Next time, you’ll pace yourself.” Mary advised, with a kind look of empathy. 

“Ugh… There won’t be a next time.” Beatrice moaned, as she joined Ava in the warmup, trying to force her body into feeling better. 

“Sweet nettle tea?” Camila offered Beatrice as she joined them. Beatrice happily accepted. 

“Don’t worry, Bea. I’m feeling it too.” Camila offered her a smile. “Staring at the computer has been pure agony this morning. I think I’m close though.” 

“Camila, can you teach me how to use a computer?” Ava interrupted before Beatrice could reply.

“When things are more calm, absolutely.” Camila told her, kindly. Ava beamed. 

“Enough talking. Who’s up first?” Lilith asked, standing. 

“Let’s go, killer.” Mary stood, surprisingly enthusiastic for combat training, for once. Maybe Ava wasn’t the only one who was desperate to improve. Lilith gave Mary a quick look of surprise, before bowing, and beginning to spar. Ava took the opportunity to talk to Beatrice. 

“I’m sorry, I really couldn’t wake you up.” Ava whispered, looking genuinely worried that Beatrice might be angry with her.

“That’s alright, Ava. I had fun with you last night, even if I do feel terrible this morning.” Beatrice replied, far from angry. Ava was relieved. 

“Me too.” Ava smiled. “Even if I did have to carry you home from the club.” She added.

“Wait, what?” Beatrice didn’t remember any of this.

“You made it about halfway, before Mary said you were… And I quote  _ too turnt. _ Do you not remember this? It was cute, you kept talking about how much you loved everyone, but  _ especially  _ me.” Ava recounted the events of the night before, with a massive grin.

“Oh my  _ God. _ ” Beatrice put her face in her hands, as the memories slowly hit her, in fragments. “That is so embarrassing. People do this for fun?” 

“It was fun! I wouldn’t have let anything bad happen to you, you know that right?” Ava asked. 

“I know, but still. I feel like a silly teenager.” Beatrice trusted her friends, and Ava, implicity. Even still, she couldn’t help but wonder if she had let  _ too many  _ walls down.

“You’re overthinking this, Bea.” Camila told her, as she rejoined them. “It was a fun night, with friends. For once, in what seems like forever, we weren’t worried about demons, or fighting, or trying not to die. It was nice.” 

“Camila, you are wise beyond your years.” Beatrice smiled, despite herself, at Camila’s kind words. 

“I agree, plus Camila has the best fashion sense of any of us.” Ava added, with a laugh. 

“Enough jokes, Ava. You’re up.” Lilith commanded, from the mat behind them. Mary was on the ground, trying to get a breath in, after losing her first round. 

“Alright…  _ Gandalf. _ ” Ava whispered the last word, but Mary and Lilith heard anyhow. 

“You’ll regret that.” Lilith’s words were mean, but her tone was light, and there was a smile on her face. Mary laughed as she pulled herself up and out of the way. 

Beatrice hadn’t seen Ava and Lilith spar up close in a while, and she watched carefully. Camila sat next to her, trying to break the last of the encryptions on the data from the casino. A short distance away, Mary was refilling her water and trying to walk off the pain from her round with Lilith. 

It was impossible for Beatrice not to be proud of both Ava and Lilith as she observed. Ava had come to Cat’s Cradle completely incompetent, at more than just fighting. To see her not only utilise the halo’s power, with control, but also execute complex sequences of attacks… It was a lot of progress for her to make, in a relatively short period of time. 

Lilith, too, had developed as a combatant, Beatrice realised. Granted, Lilith had already been a talented fighter, one of the best in their chapter of the OCS. Now, however, there was an elevated understanding of her opponents' moves - making Lilith even more deadly. Beatrice also admired how Lilith seamlessly blended her abilities with her standard fighting style. 

As they flitted around, a mess of black and gold, Beatrice caught the smile on Ava’s sweaty face. Beatrice only had a moment to admire it, however, as Ava ducked and phased to avoid Lilith’s attack. Several minutes passed, in a blur, before Lilith finally landed a hit on Ava. She hit the ground, hard, unable to avoid Lilith’s kick. 

Beatrice was worried, for a split second, before Ava laughed and got up. “That was a good one!” 

“Agreed.” Lilith added, wiping the sweat from her face. “You’re harder to hit every time.”   
“Beatrice, did you see?” Ava asked, with the enthusiastic energy of a golden retriever. 

“I did. You were both really good.” Beatrice downplayed her enthusiasm, afraid that being honest might make Ava too cocky.

“I think I found something…” Camila whispered, without looking up from the computer.

“Something… As in?” Mary asked, from behind her.

“Something, as in, a list of names. Contacts.” Camila replied. The sisters exchanged a look, fearfully, knowing the implications of the discovery. 

“Girls, I am going to be honest with all of you.” Mother Superion began, after they had run to her office and Camila explained. “I don’t know what to do.” Beatrice felt her jaw drop and a quick look around confirmed that they all felt the same way. Hearing Mother Superion admit that she didn’t know what to do… That was something they had previously thought impossible.

“Why can’t we just kill everyone on the list? Problem solved.” Mary offered, trying to simplify the issue. 

“These are powerful people, all of whom will have highly skilled security teams.” Camila explained, quietly. 

“Even if they didn’t, we can’t assassinate these people. That would sow as much political unrest than if we did nothing.” Beatrice felt the venom in her voice, which she regretted. She hadn’t seen the list of names yet, but feared the worst. 

Mother Superion didn’t reply right away, looking over the list on her desk. “I recognise most of these names…” She began, with a furtive glance at Beatrice. “The implications of this are… Complicated.” 

“Most of them have a criminal record, too. Or at least, a history of shady dealings. Except one.  _ Peduto Tipre. _ ” Camila added, quietly.

“Are we supposed to know who that is?” Ava asked, innocently. 

“I definitely don’t. He has no online presence, at least, nothing I could find. I looked pretty thoroughly.” Camila whispered, feeling as though she had failed.

“Of course not.  _ Peduto Tipre _ doesn’t exist.” Beatrice stated, resolutely. 

“What do you mean?” Lilith wondered, from the other side of the room.

“It’s obvious, isn’t it?” Beatrice replied, but from the looks she received, it obviously wasn’t. “It’s an anagram.”

“For what?” Mary asked. Beatrice looked down and sighed. 

“ _ Pope Duretti. _ ” Beatrice answered, quietly. 

“This complicates matters.” Mother Superion stated, after a few moments of shocked silence. 

“If we fail, Duretti would have us excommunicated for sure, if not worse.” Camila explained, although everyone was already aware of the implications. 

“Mary and I aren’t nuns, we could handle it alone. That way, you guys aren’t  _ technically  _ involved.” Ava suggested. 

“Absolutely not.” Beatrice and Lilith told her, in unison. 

“Camila is right, we risk excommunication, should we fail. No one who was truly loyal to  _ God _ , however, would sit by idly while…” She gestured at the files spread in front of her. “While demons are being summoned by mortal men, unaware of the consequences, yet full of greed.”

Beatrice set a hand on Mother Superion’s desk. “I’m sorry, I know this isn’t the best time to ask. But… Are they?” 

“Yes.” Mother Superion told her, with a heavy sigh. 

“Who is… What?” Ava asked, knowing she was missing something. 

“My parents are… Implicated.” Beatrice took a deep breath. “They’re on the list.”

“Oh…” Ava whispered, her face suddenly downcast and unreadable. 

“48 hours, or less, please?” Beatrice requested, facing Mother Superion. “Give me a chance to warn them… Get them out of this.” Her head pounded as she asked, although Beatrice knew it wasn’t from the alcohol the night prior. 

“Be quick about it, we’ll try to strategise and prepare while you’re gone.” Mother Superion agreed, giving Beatrice a nod. “We’ll need your brilliance back here, if we stand any chance.” She added, with a smile. 

“Thank you.” Beatrice stood and nodded respectfully, leaving the room to pack. 

Ava met Beatrice at the car, an hour later, as Beatrice quietly put her bag in the passenger seat. “Are you sure that you don’t want me to come with you?” Ava asked, concerned. 

“I’m sure. I need to do this alone, plus you’re needed here.” Beatrice replied, without meeting Ava’s eyes. 

“I doubt they need me, I’m not exactly much of a strategist, in case you haven’t noticed.”

“You’re not dumb, Ava.” Beatrice told her, finally turning around.

“Maybe not…” Ava had been winding up to make a joke, but decided against it. “Please be careful.” She added, quietly. 

“I doubt there will be violence.” 

“I know, that’s not what I mean.” Ava pressed her palm against Beatrice’s heart. “Protect this, okay?” 

Beatrice sighed and laid her head against Ava’s shoulder. “Should I even bother with this?” 

“Yes, you should. I know your parents are…  _ Not great… _ But you’re a good person, Beatrice. You would regret it if you didn’t try.” Ava said, kissing Beatrice’s forehead lightly. 

“You’re right.” Beatrice admitted, raising her head. 

“Here.” Ava handed her a bundle of papers, haphazardly rubber banded together. “There is one from each of us.” 

“Thank you.” Beatrice smiled, genuinely. Maybe she would never have parents that loved her, but she would always have her sisters. 

“You’re welcome. Hopefully you can read my handwriting.” Ava laughed. “Now go get ‘em, tiger.” 

“There is one more thing I need first…” Beatrice whispered, letting her eyes fall to Ava’s lips as she spoke. Ava understood as her hand met Beatrice’s face, tenderly, as they kissed. Several moments passed before they broke apart. 

“I love you.” Ava mumbled, quietly.

“I love you, too.” Beatrice replied, with a bittersweet smile, as she stepped into the car.

At a desolate, nearby airstrip, Beatrice sat waiting for her plane. Once again, Mother Superion insisted on travelling under the radar, a precaution she agreed with. Feeling the bundle of papers in her pocket, she pulled it out, curious to see what her sisters had written. Beatrice drew a page out at random. Angular, sharp handwriting revealed it was from Lilith, long before she saw the signature. 

_ Beatrice, _

_ Ava is hovering over my shoulder as I write this, I don’t know how you put up with her, honestly. I hope that you are successful on your mission, but know that we are all behind you, no matter what. I know that I haven’t always been easy to be around, or the best sister to you, but you have always been good to me. It hasn’t gone unnoticed and I intend to return the favour. I’ll try to keep Ava in line while you’re gone… But no promises.  _

_ Lilith.  _

At the thought of Ava pestering Lilith, Beatrice chuckled, even as a tear crossed her cheek. Her and Lilith hadn’t always gotten along flawlessly but they had always been able to count on each other in battle. Lately, although Beatrice only just consciously realised it, they had become better friends. With a small smile, Beatrice pulled the next letter out. Short, boxy letters dotted the page.

_ To Beatrice:  _

_ Some crazy girl phased through my wall to make me write this, I assume she belongs to you? But seriously, know that you don’t owe your parents any explanation of who you are. If that’s truly what they chose to focus on, with the information you are bringing them… Well, that’s really shitty. Sorry for the language. You truly are the best of us, remember that. Who you love doesn’t define you. Even if it did, it isn’t a negative thing. Hopefully this makes sense, sorry, I’m not exactly a writer.  _

_ Good luck, _

_ Mary _

Two shotguns were drawn under Mary’s signature, which Beatrice ran her finger over fondly. She took a deep, but shaky, breath. Beatrice tried to focus, to channel Mary’s confidence, tried not to feel so ashamed of who she was. Thankfully, the arrival of the plane interrupted her more negative thoughts. 

Once she was settled, awkwardly, among boxes, Beatrice retrieved the parcel from her pocket once more. This had proven to be a more emotional journey that she had expected, and she hadn’t even made it back to England yet. Unlike her and Ava’s flight to Russia, there was a small window in this cargo hold, which helped Beatrice feel less claustrophobic. Usually, she wasn’t bothered by small spaces, but the rising tide of emotions was making her feel boxed in. Camila’s note was next and she had drawn flowers and trees in the margins.

_ Bea, _

_ You can do this. I know that this probably feels more intimidating than any battle you’ve faced, but you’re brave. You’re the strongest person I know. Since I came to Cat’s Cradle, you took me under your wing, helped me learn. I think of you as a sister, not a nun, but an actual sister. So, if things go poorly (which I pray they do not), know that I will be waiting here, with open arms and a tray of brownies. Okay, Ava is yelling at me to hurry up. Love you Bea! _

_ With love, _

_ Cam _

Beatrice leaned her head against the wall, exhaling deeply. Tears fell freely, across Beatrice’s smile. She had never felt so loved before. It almost made her laugh, how she had been forced into the church as a punishment, yet it led her to a true family. “ _ God  _ works in mysterious ways.” She whispered to herself, as she unfolded Ava’s letter. 

_ To my dearest Beatrice,  _

_ That’s how they used to address letters in the olden days, I think. Did you laugh? Okay, hi. I’m going to try to ~be serious~ now. Obviously, when I got the halo, my life changed a lot. But when I met you… It changed even more. You make me so much stronger and I’m not just talking about the halo. You care about me in a way no one else ever has and I feel the same towards you. Right now, my only hope is that I can help you through this and keep you safe. If things get rough, remember that I am always thinking of you. I’ll be waiting for you to get back, probably impatiently, too. I love you, a lot, just so you know. Okay? Don’t forget.  _

_ Love, Ava _

_ P.S. You still haven’t told me your top five pasta shapes. I expect a well-reasoned answer on your return. :) _

Ava’s letter made Beatrice laugh and cry, simultaneously. With another chuckle, she thought back to before Ava, before everything turned upside-down. Everything was different, much of it not in a good way. As she flew back to England, though, Beatrice was sure about one thing. That, for the first time in her life, she was confident about a conversation with her parents. 


	12. Revealed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beatrice tries warning her parents and Ava does something for the first time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2020 has been a real ride. if you told my gay ass that i would be writing thousands of words of fanfic ABOUT NUNS i would have laughed in your face. yet here we are

Behind the walls of Cat’s Cradle, there are several fields and groves, a beautiful backdrop for the sun bleached stone buildings. It was in one of these fields that Ava, Lilith, Camila, and Mary gathered the following morning. Ava had insisted that they take training out of the courtyard, because she wanted to, in her own words,  _ go ham.  _ Everyone knew that this was code for:  _ overexert yourself recklessly to avoid thinking about Beatrice’s mission or the impending battles against demons.  _ For once, however, none of her sisters protested this plan. 

Rather, Camila had packed two coolers full of sandwiches and fruit, with plenty of water, too. Privately, Camila thought that the change of scenery might help them think of a better plan. At least, that’s what she  _ hoped.  _ Mary was less enthusiastic about the change, but she came along, partially to make sure nothing got out of hand. When Lilith and Ava really let loose, things had a tendency of going sideways, quick. 

In a refreshing change of a pace, Camila and Mary sparred first, while Lilith explained to Ava why they chose certain attacks or defenses. Ava tried her hardest to truly focus on Lilith’s words, instead of letting her mind wander. 

“Alright Ava, it might not seem like it at first, but Camila has the upper hand in this fight.” Lilith began, earning her an angry look from Mary. “Mary is bigger and stronger, of course. But Camila is faster, lighter on her feet, and a more skilled fighter. If Camila acts intelligently, she will turn Mary’s attacks against her.” 

Lilith was correct, of course. Camila dodged Mary’s punches, almost floating around her. Eventually, Mary got sloppy and a heavy attack left her off balance. With practiced precision, Camila struck at that moment, knocking Mary to the ground with a kick. 

“That was so good!” Ava exclaimed, as Camila helped Mary off the ground. 

“Thank you, Ava.” Camila replied, with a grin. 

“Do you understand the lesson here? It’s not always about raw force, try using your opponent's strength against them. That way, it becomes their weakness. The halo can only do so much, you’ll need to be good, too.” Lilith told Ava, a serious look on both their faces. 

“I understand.” Ava stated, standing up. “Are you ready to go?”

“I am.” Lilith replied, joining her. Mary and Camila gave them some space, taking refuge under a shady tree. 

As their sparring began, Ava made a conscious effort to dodge Lilith’s strikes without phasing. At first, it felt foreign, but after several minutes, Ava found herself smoothly avoiding attacks. They both moved faster than most, even by OCS training standards. Mary and Camila struggled to follow the pattern of the fight, as attacks and defenses seemed to blur in the air. 

“They’re both getting stronger.” Camila whispered, half to herself.

“I know.” Mary replied. “Almost makes me think we have a chance.” 

“ _ God  _ brought them both back to us, I know he has big plans. For us all.” Camila’s words were kind, hopeful. 

“Ain’t that the truth.” Mary added, leaning her head back and closing her eyes. The sun felt good on her face and she tried to savour the moment of calm. 

Just when Ava would have landed her first hit, Lilith teleported behind her, knocking Ava off balance with a quick strike. After a stumble, however, Ava turned and remained on her feet. Sweat dripped into her eyes, as she phased through a series of attacks, trying to regain her footing. With a smile, Ava managed to defend herself, evening the playing field once more. 

Blocking Lilith’s claws from hitting her, Ava turned, trying to find a good angle. A moment later, she found her opening. With a false strike, Ava goaded Lilith into teleporting around her, as she had done several times before. This time, however, Ava was anticipating it. When Lilith rematerialised behind her, Ava punched her square in the jaw, knocking her to the ground. 

“Wooo! Champion fighter!” Ava cheered, raising her hands above her head for a moment, before helping Lilith off the ground. 

“That was good, Ava.” Lilith noted, secretly proud, as she rubbed her jaw. 

“Thank you! Okay, who’s next?” Ava asked, exciting to fight again. 

“I’ll take you.” Camila offered. “But no powers, okay?” 

“Okay!” Ava was bristling with adrenaline from her victory. “We’ve never sparred before, this should be fun.” 

“I agree.” Camila laughed, happy to see Ava succeed.

Lilith joined Mary under the tree as Camila stepped up for her second round. “You’re not going to let her win again that easily, are you?” Mary asked, as Lilith sat down.

“Absolutely not.” Lilith replied, with a smile. 

“That’s my girl.” Mary laughed.

Meanwhile, Camila knocked Ava to the ground for the fourth time. “Camila, why?” Ava clutched her heart, dramatically. 

“Ava, your  _ single  _ victory over Lilith made you over confident. Let’s try again.” Camila offered Ava a hand as she spoke. 

“Okay, you’re right. Focused and humble, that’s me, got it.” Despite the joke, Ava really did try to focus. If she forced herself she could  _ almost  _ go a few minutes without thinking of Beatrice. Without  _ worrying  _ about Beatrice. 

With nervous hands, Beatrice smoothed her hands over the cloth covering her hair. She stood outside the door of her parents’ home. Her home. Or at least, it used to be. Lately, she had been spending more time in civilian clothes than her habit, idly Beatrice wondered if this representative of the woman that she was becoming - a symbol of her departure from the path of the lord. No, she realised, it wasn’t. Clothing doesn’t dictate your devotion to  _ God.  _

Time slowed as the door swung open. “ _ Beatrice. _ ” Her father said, with no indication of any emotion.

“Father.” Beatrice paused, as she heard footsteps in the hallway behind him. “Mother.” The formality and coldness in her voice was unmistakable. 

“What are you doing here?” Her mother asked, quiety.

“We need to talk.” Beatrice answered, her tone was reserved but confident. 

Camila was about to knock Ava down, again, when her hand collided into something that was decidedly not Ava. A familiar gold light flooded the air, although this time, Ava’s shockwave hung in the air. 

“A shield…” Camila whispered, dropping her hand. Lilith and Mary looked on in surprise, although Ava looked as shocked as they did. 

Ava maintained the shield for a few moments longer, before it crackled out of existence. Her knees buckled underneath her, as her head swam.

“I thought we agreed, no powers!” Camila jokes, her voice full of awe. Ava barely registers it before her head hits the dirt. 

“What  _ was  _ that?” Mary asked, incredulously, as they dragged Ava out of the sun.

“She’s never done that before, not with me, anyhow.” Lilith mentioned. 

“She did say she wanted to go  _ ham  _ today, guess she got her wish.” Mary laughed. 

“I don’t know if a halo bearer has  _ ever  _ done that.” Camila whispered, wishing that she had a digitised version of the diaries to refer to, one that was all in English.

“Are you saying…” Lilith trailed off, now staring at Camila. 

“That Ava has powers that have never been documented? Yes.” 

“ _ Powers?  _ As in, multiple?” Mary looked down at Ava’s unconscious face as she spoke.

“Ava’s done a lot that we haven’t seen before. Perhaps there’s a reason that the halo resurrected her.” Camila whispered.

“It’s because I’m cute.” Ava mumbled, her eyes still closed. Privately, however, Ava couldn’t help but feel even more pressure than she already had. If she really was more powerful than those who came before her, a failure would surely look even worse.  _ I wonder if this burden will break me. _

“When were you going to mention you could do that?” Lilith asked, surprisingly gently, as she bent over Ava. 

“I didn’t… I didn’t know I  _ could.  _ Camila was beating me so fast, we’ve never fought before, I don’t know anything about her style….” Words were tumbling out of Ava’s mouth as she sat up. “I thought to myself, I wish I had a shield right now. Then, I did.” 

“Couldn’t have said it better myself.” Mary jokes, offering Ava a hand up, which she gratefully accepted. 

“Mary, why don’t you and I have a go? I think Ava and Camila have earned a break.” Lilith asked, her eyes glinting in the sunlight. 

Ava sat quietly as Mary and Lilith spared, although her eyes looked downward.  _ That’s embarrassing. Just when I thought I could control my abilities, I discovered a whole new one. I wonder if Camila is right… About me, about my abilities. I doubt she would lie but… It’s a lot of pressure.  _ Her thoughts raced, thinking about the implications about Camila’s words. Until they were interrupted by another thought, simple, yet powerful.  _ I miss Beatrice and I hope she is okay. _

“You should eat something, Ava.” Camila set a hand on Ava’s shoulder as she spoke. 

“Hmmm…?” Ava was still lost in thought and hadn’t actually heard what was said. 

“Ava.” Camila’s voice became sharper, more dominant. “Eat something.” 

“Okay, okay. Sorry, I was thinking about something.” 

“I know. I’m worried too.” Camila whispered, handing Ava a sandwich. 

“I’m so worried… Confused… So messed up that sometimes I wonder how I can fit all of the emotion in my head at one time. Does that make sense?” Ava stuttered, quietly. 

“I understand how you feel.” Camila sighed. “I haven’t been here that much longer than you, Ava. But I trust all the girls here. I trust my team. I trust you. I have faith in us and our mission - in the halo.”

“Sometimes, I think you believe in me more than I do.” Ava laughed, but it was a humourless one. 

“I do. But that’s okay. I know you’ll get there.” Camila smiled as she slowly cut an apple into neat slices. 

“Even with the weight of… I don’t know, the  _ world  _ on us… This demonic threat, Duretti, my powers, my burden… The only thought I can focus on is Beatrice.” Ava felt her cheeks go red as she said it aloud. 

“Me too.”

“How  _ dare  _ you come here, without warning, to lecture us? To lecture us, mind you, on matters that you know  _ nothing  _ about!” Beatrice flinched as her father screamed, once they were behind closed doors. 

“How dare I? You have  _ no idea  _ about the implications of your actions.” Beatrice fought to remain calm, although her tone was even and cool.

“Watch how you speak to your father.”

“I came here at  _ great personal risk _ to warn you. I didn’t have to, mind you, I chose to.”

“What do you know about this? About anything? You’re a  _ nun. _ ” Her father spit. Beatrice could have laughed, in a sick way.

“You forced me into this.” Beatrice whispered, trying to repress the memories of her childhood that came flooding back.

“Forced you? You mean  _ saved you?  _ You’re welcome.” Beatrice’s mother replied, with contempt in her voice. 

“I didn’t come here to argue or be subjected to your ridiculous beliefs. I’ve given you my warning, do with it as you will. I did my best. My conscience is clear.” Beatrice headed for the door.

As she crossed the threshold, her father moved to slam the door. Despite her best judgement, Beatrice blocked it with her arm and turned around, skillfully quick in her movements. Through the small crack, she could see both of them, standing there, full of disdain. 

“For the record, the only thing you two saved me from…” Beatrice took a deep breath. “Is hundreds of chances at happiness.” She removed her arm and her parents closed the door without another word. 

Beatrice stood in the street for a moment, as rain began to fall. Looking up, she closed her eyes and let the rain hit her face. Weirdly, despite the painful memories that this trip had resurfaced, Beatrice felt free. A smile spread across her face and cool rain ran down her face. Under her breath, Beatrice whispered a word, before walking away from home for the last time. 

“Goodbye.”


	13. Song of Solomon 4:10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beatrice returns, a meeting happens, feelings get hurt. Beatrice and Ava share a new experience

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. SEASON TWO CONFIRMED FUCK YES
> 
> 2\. S/O to God and satan, you know who you are ;)
> 
> 3\. this chapter was the hardest one to write yet so sorry if its bad

Ava had spent the late afternoon practicing her handwriting, trying to make it look less like that of a child’s. Training and discovering new abilities all day had left her conflicted, exhausted, and sunburnt. Working on something mundane provided a distraction, at least somewhat. As she penned letters on the page, however, she caught the sound of a closing car door from outside. 

“ _ Beatrice! _ ” Ava whispered, already out of her chair and racing down the halls. She freely used the halo to propel her through the building faster, phasing through anything or  _ anyone  _ that got in her way. Beatrice had barely stood up when she was hit by a tank. A tank named Ava.

“Hi! Are you okay? I missed you! How did it go? Seriously, are you okay? Oh, also I’m a shield now!” Ava spoke so quickly as she hugged Beatrice that the words barely made sense. Beatrice laughed and tried to answer each question individually. 

“I’m okay, Ava.” 

“What happened?” Ava choked out, managing to slow down her words. 

“I will tell you about it later. It went exactly how I expected it to. We should probably be strategising about our next move now, though. Did we get any closer to a plan while I was gone?” Beatrice asked, moving towards the building. 

“Well… No.” Ava answered, sadly and honestly. 

“Oh…” Beatrice looked down for a moment. “What do you mean you’re a shield now?”

“I’ll…” Ava was suddenly self-conscious. “Can I explain that later, too?” 

“Alright. We have work to do now.” Beatrice sighed as she headed inside. Ava followed.

Several minutes later, they were gathered in Mother Superion’s office, trying to decide on a course of action. “Beatrice, how did your mission go?” Mother Superion asked, the moment Beatrice entered the room.

“Fine.”

“Are your parents going to correct their course of action?” 

“They have been made aware of the potential consequences of their behaviour. Whether or not they acknowledge that is not up to me. It’s their burden now.” Beatrice’s words were so cold, that they seemed to leave a chill in the air. Concern was obvious in Ava’s eyes, as well as everyone else’s. 

“Alright.” Thankfully, Mother Superion didn’t press the matter any further. “How was training? Did any strategies for dealing with this get decided?” 

“No, but Ava made a shield!” Camila nearly yelled, beaming. Beatrice shot a look at Ava, expecting her to look happy. Instead, she looked shy and embarrassed. There was something else, too, but Beatrice couldn’t quite place it. 

“Explain.” Mother Superion demanded. 

“Camila was sparring with Ava, beating her pretty easily.” Lilith began, recounting the day’s events. “But then… It was like a shockwave that didn’t move. Camila couldn’t punch through it, either, and the light was almost blinding.”

“I don’t think that’s ever been seen before!” Camila added, quietly but with excitement. 

“It drains the halo pretty quick though. Ava got a faceful of dirt after only a few moments of holding it.” Mary told Mother Superion.

“Ava, would you like to explain?” Mother Superion requested, after taking a few notes. 

“That pretty much covers it.” Ava said quietly.

“Very well.” Mother Superion changed the subject once more. “I’ve been going over the data for the last day. Not all of the rituals will be on the same day, instead they are scattered over several weeks, to avoid drawing attention.” 

“You want us to travel to each one, individually, and put a stop to it?” Lilith asked.

“No. The two rituals we’ve already stopped have drawn too much attention as it is. If too many get stopped, they will change their plans, leaving us with no intel. Additionally, even with a full team, we lack the numbers to effectively cover each site.”

“We need to figure out a way to prevent it all together.” Mary stated. 

“Without getting caught or recognised, too. Otherwise we risk much worse than just excommunication.” Camila added, her voice dripping with trepidation. 

“What if we closed the gate to…  _ Hell.  _ Then the demons wouldn’t be able to be summoned, rituals or otherwise.” Ava whispered, seemingly a million miles away. 

“I doubt it would be possible…” Lilith trailed off, visions of the clawing pits of demons fresh in her mind. 

“Possible or not its an idiotic idea.” Mary shouted, losing her temper with both of them. “You two almost  _ died,  _ not to mention your emotional scars, yet you’re both ready to just go back? On what, a  _ hunch?  _ Remember how well Ava’s last hunch went?” She regretted the last sentence the moment she said it, but it was too late. 

“Mary, that is hardly fair.” Beatrice snapped, but Ava had already left, phasing through the wall. Lilith teleported away a moment later, her face dark and unreadable.

“I agree with your sentiment but that is not an acceptable way to speak to your sisters.” Mother Superion chastised Mary. 

“I know. I’m sorry.” Mary turned to look out the window. “I didn’t mean it as an insult. Really. But the thought of losing them…”

“We’re no closer to finding a plan and we’re fighting amongst ourselves. This is not good.” Camila stated the obvious, mostly to herself. 

“We don’t have time for this.” Beatrice mumbled, excusing herself from the meeting. She walked quickly into the hallway, frustrated.

Ava was standing in one of the grassy fields behind Cat’s Cradle, looking out at the city lights in the distance. Her breaths were raggedy and shaky, but not from the run up there. As she tried to force breaths in, Ava heard a staticy crackle behind her. 

“Lilith, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…” Ava began, knowing who it was without turning around. 

“I know what you meant, Ava. I doubt it’s even possible… But it’s definitely reckless. I don’t think we can afford to lose you, especially not now.”

“There would be another warrior nun, after me. A better one, most likely.”

“I’m not sure that’s true.” Lilith whispered, laying a hand on Ava’s shoulder. 

“Maybe we are going about this all wrong…” Ava sighed. 

“What do you mean?”

“I know we are trying to stay… I don’t know,  _ covert… _ But if we could prove that Duretti and other clergymen are involved, wouldn’t that… Wouldn’t that protect you from excommunication? Duretti would be jailed, along with others…” Ava stuttered as she spoke and she couldn’t help but feel slightly stupid.

“It’s a possibility. I know we’ve all thought about it - dropping the secrecy for a head-on attack. It’s certainly not our usual style though and leaves no margin for error. No contingency plan.” Lilith explained. Ava was thankful for the explanation, of which she seemed to be getting a lot lately. 

“Beatrice loves a contingency plan. Or seven.” Ava smiled.

“It’s not in our best interests. Given that… It might be our only option.”

“Good thing you’re a beast.” Ava jokes, trying to ignore the weight of the world on her shoulders and the burden in her back. 

“Ava, stop calling me that.” Lilith replied with a laugh. “Please come back in, when you’re ready. We’ll need your help to come up with a plan.” Lilith disappeared again, presumably back into Mother Superion’s office. 

Ava stood for several minutes, unmoving. Talking to Lilith had helped, slightly, but Mary was right. Everyone was right, it seemed, except her.  _ This is my burden, my fight. Failure isn’t an option.  _ In that moment, while Ava didn’t feel any lighter, she did find it slightly easier to breathe. That had to be enough for now. 

Beatrice made it back to Mother Superion’s office before Ava. “She’s coming. Give her a minute.” Lilith said, after teleporting back with a crackle. 

“Mary, you should apologise when she returns.” Beatrice told her.

“I know.” Mary answered, quietly. Almost as if summoned, Ava walked in a moment later. Her cheeks were flushed and she looked down as she walked.

“Ava, I’m sor -” Mary began. Ava held up a hand.

“You are right. Don’t apologise.” Ava replied.

“Why can’t we continue stopping rituals and let Duretti come to us once he figures it out?” Camila asked in a meek voice.

“Why don’t we just kill Duretti? Problem solved.” The venom in Mary’s voice was unmistakable. 

“You can’t  _ kill  _ the Pope, corrupt or not.” Mother Superion growled. “But if we stopped enough rituals… We would be saving lives and maybe…”

“We could force him into revealing himself.” Beatrice finished Mother Superion’s sentence; always three steps ahead of everyone else. 

“It is still risky, of course. We could get excommunicated and that is a best case scenario for our failure. I will start drawing up plans tonight, but I encourage you all to decide soon whether you are in - or not. I realise that this could mean giving up a lot, all you’ve known....” Mother Superion’s words took the oxygen from the room, making it harder for the sisters to breathe. Ava broke the silence first. 

“I probably have the least to lose, I never took vows and I’m not even  _ technically  _ a member of the OCS. But I’m in.” Her face was determined as she spoke.

“I’m in.” Mary echoed, with a nod towards Ava. 

“Me too. Vows or not, this is not what  _ God  _ would want.” Camila added, confident in her faith.

“I pray that we don’t have to consider the failure conditions of this mission. Either way, I can’t turn my back on this.” Beatrice stated with slow intention. Lilith seemed to be lost in thought, torn on her decision. 

“I…” She began, without looking at anyone. “A few months ago, a mission like this would have been out of the question entirely. But now… It doesn’t even seem like a choice, really.”

Mother Superion smiled, as if she had known they would all agree. “We have a few days before the next ritual is scheduled. I suggest you all get some sleep and report to training in the morning. I’ll summon you when it’s time for your briefings.” She dismissed them without another word. Despite the implications and complexities of their mission, there was a spark of hope in the air. 

“Can we talk now?” Ava whispered to Beatrice, as they lay together in the dark, much later. A single candle was lit on the bedside table, and with its light, Ava could see the outline of Beatrice’s beautiful face. 

“Of course.” Beatrice replied, gently running her hand along Ava’s face, equally illuminated by the candlelight. 

“How did it go, honestly?” 

“It went about as well as I expected it to go. They don’t have any respect for me nor do they think I am capable of analytical thought.” Beatrice explained, although she didn’t sound upset. 

“But you’re the smartest person I know!”

“You don’t know very many people, Ava.”

“Fair, but… Well, you’re still crazy, wicked smart.” Ava replied with a smile.

“My parents don’t seem to think so, despite the grades I brought home as a child. It doesn’t matter. I warned them, as best as I could without giving away too much information about what we  _ actually  _ do here. Whatever they decide to do is their choice now. I took a huge risk to warn them and instead, they wanted to admonish me for my  _ flaws. _ ” A single tear splashed against the pillow. 

“You’re not flawed, Beatrice. I’m sorry.” Ava mumbled, barely audible. 

“It’s not your fault. It’s interesting though… I wasn’t that upset about it. I thought I would be, yet I wasn’t. A younger me would have been broken for days over their words, but now… I feel oddly free.” Ava didn’t reply. Instead, she gently put an arm around Beatrice, pulling even closer than she had already been. 

Ava’s sudden closeness made Beatrice’s face go red and her brain feel muddied, slow. It took several seconds before she was able to string together a sentence again.

“Can you tell me about your day now?” She asked, curious to hear about Ava’s new ability.

“Okay…” Ava sounded less than excited. “I was sparring with Camila, she’s a really talented fighter, did you know that?” 

“Yes Ava, I did know that.” 

“Of course you did. Sorry. Anyways, I was losing each round in… I don’t know a minute or less. And I thought to myself, I wish I could manifest a shield or something, to give me a moment of breathing room in this fight. And then I did.” 

“That’s amazing…” Beatrice whispered. 

“It drained the halo really fast, I blacked out in the dirt.” Ava sounded embarrassed as she recounted it. “When I was waking up, I heard the others talking…” She didn’t finish her sentence. 

“About?” Beatrice prodded, gently. 

“Camila said that what I did… Well, it’s never been done before. And apparently it’s not the only thing I’ve done that’s… A first time thing…” Ava stuttered, suddenly speaking in sentence fragments. 

“Why are you saying this like a bad thing?” Beatrice asked, realising a moment later why Ava thought it was. “Oh…”

“The halo is a burden. Everyone who dies, from a demon… That I can’t save. Everyone who suffers… That’s on me. If what Camila says is true; and I have no reason to doubt her… Then it’s doubly bad. If I’m like… I don’t know…. A super powerful halo bearer and still people die… Well, that makes me an even bigger failure.” Ava cried as she spoke, gentle sobs rattling her chest. 

This time, it was Beatrice’s turn to pull Ava in closer, until there was no space left between them. With a calm and gentle hand, Beatrice pressed Ava’s head into her shoulder, absorbing her tears. 

“You will never be a failure, Ava.” Beatrice stated after several deep breaths. 

“How do you know?” 

“Well, I am crazy, wicked smart. Or haven’t you heard?” Beatrice smiled.

“That’s true…” Ava replied as her sobs slowed down. 

Ava lifted her head to look at Beatrice, to admire her once more. Tears still glittered on her face and Ava’s eyes were darkened from a chronic lack of sleep. 

“I never thought I would fall in love with a nun.” Ava mused.

“I never thought I would fall in love.” Beatrice added, coyly. 

“I guess there is a first time for everything.”

Ava and Beatrice experienced another first that night, one that they had both secretly been dreaming of for weeks. It happened slowly, tenderly, as each woman treated the other with sacred reverence. Although the candle had, initially, been the only light in the room, golden rays spilled out from under the crack in the door. 

Beatrice wondered if her other sisters would be able to tell in the morning - if she would look different. 


	14. Farfalle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beatrice FINALLY reveals her favourite pasta shape.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> iM LoNeLy

“Do you have something you want to tell me about?” Mary asked Beatrice, who was in the passenger seat of the car. They were making a supply run, Mary could have gone alone, but for  _ some  _ reason, insisted on Beatrice’s company. 

“No?” Beatrice tried to play dumb.

“Beatrice. My sweet summer child. You and Ava were making googly eyes at each other all through breakfast. Your skin is flushed and you haven’t stopped smiling. Do you think I’m an idiot?” Mary had her dead to rights.

“I…” Beatrice was looking out the window, a smile still plastered on her face. “We…”

“It’s about damn time.” Mary laughed. Beatrice didn’t bother to correct her language on this occasion. 

“So it was good then?” Mary asked after several minutes of Beatrice not replying.

“It was more than good… The halo was blinding though. I am surprised that no one saw it in the hallway, shining under the door.”

“Oh, Camila did.” Mary added. Beatrice froze, eyes wide. 

“Ava, shift your weight to your back foot, then push forward at the last moment. You’ll dodge better if you can stay light on your feet.” Lilith instructed, as her and Camila worked on refining Ava’s technique for the inevitable upcoming battles. 

“Ava had no trouble shifting her weight around last night…” Camila whispered, not quietly enough.

Ava froze as Lilith attacked, too busy staring at Camila. Lilith didn’t stop her punch in time, though, knocking Ava to the ground. 

“What did you just say, Camila?” Ava muttered, still on the ground.

“Um…” Camila wasn’t sure how to answer. Lilith looked on with an amused grin. 

“How did you know? Does everyone know?” Ava stood up with a manic energy. 

“Last night the hallway was filled with blinding light, which for once, wasn’t followed by an explosion.” Camila explained.

“Plus, you two were extra weird this morning at breakfast.” Lilith added, still looking amused.

“This is embarrassing...” Ava put her bloody face in her hands, unwilling to look at either of them.

“I think it’s cute…” Camila told her.

“I… Can we get back to training and save this embarrassment for another day?” Ava asked, her ears going red as she spoke.

“I have no issues with that. You need to practice more with a sword.” Lilith tossed a practice sword at Ava.

“Fine…” Camila pouted. “But we  _ are _ talking about this at some point.” 

In the afternoon, all five sisters found themselves in Mother Superion’s office for their mission briefing. It was unmistakably tense in the room, yet hopeful. Everyone was nervous about going back into battle, the stakes seemed much higher than a standard mission. Having decided on a course of action, however, had given everyone a scrap of hope. 

“The day after tomorrow, there should be a ritual in Portugal. It’s happening rurally, in a small town on the Southern coast, to avoid attracting attention.” Mother Superion opened, without a greeting or any traditional pleasantries. 

“Who are you sending?” Ava wondered. She spoke quietly, fearfully, remembering the last time she wasn’t sent along with everyone else. 

“All of you. According to the data, as well as a few of my  _ underground  _ contacts, this will be the biggest demon we’ve seen yet. It will take all of you, working as a team, to stand a chance.”

“What about the summoners? Do you want us to kill them or let them live? If they see us…” Mary asked. Mother Superion sighed before answering. 

“Take them out, if the demon doesn’t first.” Ava felt her blood run cold at the order.

“What kind of demon will it be, do you know?” Lilith had a morbid curiosity in her eyes. 

“It doesn’t say in any of the records.” Camila started. “There is a loose ranking based on how powerful the demons are expected to be, but it's subjective.”

“Thank you, Camila. Is there anything else we need to know?”

“No. Finish your afternoon training sessions and attend tomorrow morning’s as well. You can take tomorrow afternoon to rest and get ready. It’ll be an early start.” 

In the hallway, Ava pulled Beatrice aside for a word. As their sisters walked back outside, wolf whistles echoed around them. 

“Everybody knows.” Ava whispered, once everyone was out of earshot. 

“I know.” Beatrice admitted, remembering her conversation with Mary in the car. 

“I’m sorry.” Ava hung her head and turned to walk away. 

“Wait! Why are you sorry?” Beatrice grabbed her wrist, pulling Ava back. 

“I… I don’t know. It’s embarrassing and I thought… I was scared you were going to say you regretted it.” Ava stumbled over her words. 

“What? Of course not. Well, it’s a little embarrassing, but I would never…” 

“Oh… Okay. Sorry.” Ava apologised again. 

“Stop apologising!” Beatrice gave Ava a quick kiss on the cheek, just catching the corner of her mouth. “Let’s get out there.”

“And Ava?” Beatrice asked as they headed for the courtyard, hand in hand. 

“Yes?”

“My favourite pasta shape is farfalle.” Ava dropped Beatrice’s hand, dramatically, as though she had been insulted. 

“ _ Farfalle?! _ ” 

“Is that bad?” Beatrice wondered as she laughed at Ava’s obnoxious behaviour. 

“Oh,  _ honey _ . It’s definitely not  _ good. _ ” Ava chuckled, although she grasped Beatrice’s hand once more. 

“We should work on that shield, today. Try to do it on command.” Mary suggested, as Ava and Beatrice joined everyone outside. 

“Good idea. Plus, maybe with practice I could make it bigger, to protect all of you.” Ava was hopeful at the concept of being able to protect her sisters. 

Beatrice ground her teeth and clenched her fists while watching this training session. Watching Ava get hit over and over again, healing abilities or not, was difficult. Lilith was going for more attacks than usual, trying to trigger Ava’s shield ability. So far, Ava wasn’t able to replicate it, although her blood was splattered across the mats and cobblestones. 

_ Ow, ow, ow. Come on, Ava, get it together. You’re getting kicked to shit here. This has been a really embarrassing day. Stop feeling sorry for yourself! FOCUS! Not only are you losing dramatically, you’re losing dramatically in front of Beatrice. Doubly bad.  _

At the thought of Beatrice, Ava smiled. It was an ugly smile, though, as blood coated her teeth. The momentary distraction gave Lilith another opportunity, as well, earning Ava a hit across the face. She spit blood on the ground, and shook her head, trying to clear the sudden double vision. 

“Ava, I really don’t want to keep hitting you.” Lilith stated, pausing her onslaught. 

“No, it’s okay. I got this. Keep going.” Ava commanded, fiercely. With that, something seemed to click, and Ava managed to generate a golden shield for the second time. Beatrice couldn’t help but gasp upon seeing it for the first time.

Lilith hammered several hits, all in quick succession, on Ava’s shield. It was solid. Ava held it for much longer the second time, before the halo dimmed, making her head swim. This time, however, someone caught her before she hit the ground. 

“That was really good, Ava.” Beatrice whispered, from underneath Ava’s limp and crumbled body. Ava moaned quietly but didn’t reply right away. 

“That was fifteen seconds longer than before!” Camila exclaimed, looking at her watch. 

“Very good, Ava.” Lilith agreed, a proud smile on her face. 

Beatrice pushed the sweaty, bloody hair from Ava’s face. “Are you okay in there?” She whispered, as Ava began to stir in her arms. 

“ _ Farfalle.  _ I still can’t believe it.” Ava mumbled, without opening her eyes. 


	15. Deja Vu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another day, another demon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my back hurts

It had been a tense car ride. Several hours passed with barely a word between any of the sisters. A few times, Ava or Camila tried to make conversation, but it was short lived. As they drove, however, Ava was grateful for Beatrice’s steady presence next to her in the back seat. 

Mary slowed down as they got closer and Ava began searching the skies for any sign of demons. It didn’t take long before she saw the telltale wraiths circling.

“There!” She yelled, suddenly, starting everyone. Ava pointed above the trees, towards the ocean. Mary accelerated, following the road around the corner. The scene was almost identical to that in Russia, although more men had been hired for this job. They stood in a circle, on the empty beach, while one of their number was reading from an ancient text.

If they hadn’t been trying to summon a demon, it would have been a truly beautiful scene. Cliffs enclosed the small strip of sand on both sides and the shallow waters were dotted with severe looking stone. A small, nearly unused road, ran alongside the water, with dense forest on the other side. 

In her haste to prevent the demon from being summoned, Ava phased through the car, and hit the ground. She ran towards the men, drawing their attention, immediately. Lilith had no choice but to teleport after her, with a clearly frustrated look on her face. 

“Not exactly the subtle approach, is it?” Mary grumbled as she hastily parked the car. Neither Camila or Beatrice answered, however, as they rushed out of the car to join the fight. 

Whoever had hired these men had chosen well, Beatrice realised at once. There were ten this time, all of whom were obviously well trained. Nine of them opened fire on Ava as she approached, while clustering around the man who was performing the ritual. As flashes of blue whizzed past her, Beatrice made another horrible realisation. 

“Ava! Divinium bullets!” Beatrice shouted, forcing herself to run faster as she did so. Ava, for her surprising lack of observation skills, had already noticed this. It was obvious to her, however, because she had already been grazed by several bullets. The uniquely painful burning sensation of Divinium wounds had been a  _ dead  _ giveaway. 

While Beatrice, Lilith, Ava, and Mary, had all rushed forward, Camila took cover behind a massive washed up log. From her, she poked her head up, taking precise shots at the men who were now attacking her sisters. Within a minute, she had already dropped two of them. 

Mary preferred a more confrontational form of gunplay, a preference that she demonstrated on the beach that day. Shotgun blasts echoed against the cliffs as Mary’s shells found their target. As Mary paused to reload her guns, one of the unnamed men took aim at her. Before either of them could react, a knife pierced the side of his head. He was dead before he hit the ground.

“Thanks Beatrice.” Mary whispered as her gun snapped closed. Beatrice didn’t reply, instead she worked on fighting her way towards the man who was reading from the book. With admirable speed and skill, Beatrice knocked three men into the sand in quick succession. She had only traded blows with each of them for a matter of seconds, yet her knives found an opening regardless.

Ava fought well, significantly better than she had in the past. Wielding the Divinium sword with a new confidence, she moved across the sand, trying to avoid bullets. It was obvious that most of the men were aiming for Ava, rather than any of the other sisters. Blood ran down her face from a grazing blow, but she ignored that as she ran her sword through one of the men. A guilty, pained look etched itself onto her face as his body dropped heavily into the sand. 

Suddenly, it was quiet. The man who had been performing the ritual dropped to the ground, his throat sliced by Lilith’s claws. Time seemed to slow down as he dropped to his knees and then face first into the sand. Lilith’s grey hair swirled around her face in the ocean breeze. Her expression was terrifyingly neutral. 

“Is that it? Did we stop it this time?” Ava asked. Everyone seemed to relax and Camila joined them, gently walking over the pile of bodies. After giving Lilith a quick pat on the shoulder, Camila picked up the book that the man had been reading from. 

“We’ve been set up.” Camila whispered after scanning the passage. Her face looked ashen at the revelation.

“What do you mean, set up?” Mary wondered. There was no mistaking the angry fear in her voice. 

“They knew we were coming. They must have, the ritual needed blood to be completed. Look around, they didn’t bring a sacrifice.” Beatrice had joined Camila and spoke to them without looking up from the page. Her voice was metered, controlled, but the tension was obvious. 

“Either we are the sacrifice, or they are. No matter what, they get their way. But where’s the demon?” Lilith looked at her bloody claws as she asked. As if the demon had a sense of dramatic irony, a portal opened up behind her, revealing a massive beast. 

Mother Superion’s intel hadn’t been wrong, unfortunately. Static crackled through the air as a hulking beast pulled it’s way out of the portal. Black, weathered skin stretched over the demon’s gnarled joints and muscular limbs. Bloody horns sprouted from its head and claws from its hands and feet. A humanoid head anointed its body, filling the air with screams. 

Upon looking up at the huge mass of demon, easily twenty feet tall, it was hard not to be intimidated. Its tail swung powerfully behind it, knocking boulder sized chunks of stone from the nearby cliff face. Camila made the sign of the cross before beginning to fire rounds into the beast. Having been the closest to the portal, Lilith quickly became the demon’s first target. 

Despite its size, it moved with insane speed, trying to strike Lilith. A moment before impact, the demon’s claw connected with something solid. Somehow, Ava had managed to shield Lilith with the halo, earning her a look of surprise from everyone. Even the demon seemed confused, for a moment, before continuing its attacks. 

As the demon lumbered forward, it swung its massive claws, knocking thick clouds of sand into the air. The lack of visibility provided the sisters with an advantage - it was easy to see where the demon was, but it couldn’t always see them. Mary took advantage of this, firing four successive blasts into its chest. 

Camila’s shots also punctuated the air, as Ava and Beatrice drew in closer. They fought in beautiful synchronicity, alternating their strikes and moving around the demon’s ruthless attacks. Ava shielded all of her sisters at least once during the fight, secretly impressing herself with her new ability to shield other people.  _ Finally, I am protecting those I care about.  _ If she timed it well, she only needed to produce a shield for a few moments, keeping her from draining the halo.

While the others distracted the beast, Lilith teleported onto it’s shoulders. Careful to avoid the horns, she stuck a clawed hand into each eye, effectively blinding it. Writhing, the demon fell to the ground, horrific screaming filling the air. Each sister crept forward, unsure if they were about to be thrown back into battle. 

As the demon seized in the dirt, its tail whipped around, knocking Beatrice, Camila, and Mary clear across the beach. They each landed, hard, a few hundred feet away. Ava had phased through the tail, although she wasn’t close enough to phase anyone with her. Similarly, Lilith had teleported around it. Together, they drew closer to the demon.

“We need to take it back… Ourselves. This is too dangerous. We’re risking injury and discovery.” Lilith spoke quickly as she brushed sand from her eyes and face. 

“Alright.” Ava croaked. Her throat was thick with sand and blood. She was dreading a return journey to  _ Hell,  _ but it was what needed to be done. 

Beatrice lifted her head and tried to get a breath in. Getting hit so hard had completely knocked the air from her lungs. With unsteady vision, lined with black edges, she saw Lilith and Ava join hands, before teleporting the demon back to  _ Hell.  _ They were all gone an instant later, leaving her, Mary, and Camila behind on the beach. Beatrice felt a deep pang of worry before blacking out in the sand.

When Ava opened her eyes again, they were on the edge of the canyon in  _ Hell.  _ An unmistakable cacophony of demons echoed from the bottom of the canyon, ringing in her ears. Standing up, Ava saw Lilith to her left, and the demon in front of them both. It was standing on the edge of the canyon, although Ava feared it still wouldn’t be easy to push it over the edge. 

That day in  _ Hell,  _ Ava fought harder than she ever had. Thankfully, this time she had the wherewithal to bring the Divinium sword with her. It slashed mercilessly across the demon as Ava phased through its sequential attacks. Lilith, too, fought fiercely, admirably. 

The tide of battle changed, however, when the demon called for help from its brethren. Perhaps, given the locale, this should have been a predictable outcome. In the heat of battle, though, it wasn’t. Lilith shot Ava a terrified look, as she was reminded so vividly of both her nightmares and experiences in this awful place. 

Rocks shattered and the sound of screams filled the air as demons of all sizes clawed their way up the canyon walls, eager to feast on living beings. The demon almost seemed to smile at them, in a disconcerting human way - as if it was gloating. Ava took a deep breath to steady herself, preparing to do something she wasn’t even sure was possible. 

“Bea?” Camila was hovering over Beatrice’s unconscious form, gently taking her pulse. “She’s breathing.” Camila told Mary, who had just risen. 

“Thank  _ God  _ for the small miracles.” Mary muttered, frustration evident in her voice. Beatrice tried opening her eyes, but the sunlight was painful blinding.

“Are you… Okay?” Beatrice’s voice was hoarse and quiet.

“Are you?” Camila countered. Beatrice tried opening her eyes again, more slowly this time. Her mind felt as though it were moving in half speed and nothing quite made sense. As she focused, Camila’s face swam into focus above her.

“Bleeding.” Beatrice whispered, pointing to a nasty gash on Camila’s head that extended deep past her hairline. Blood had dripped down her face and soaked into the collar of her shirt.

“Very astute. So are you. But we have bigger problems to worry about right now.” Camila stated, with a look towards where the demon had been.

“I saw… Back to…  _ Hell. _ ” She choked on the last word as Camila and Mary exchanged a look.

“I swear… If they make it back I will kill them both.” Mary threatened. 

“ _ When  _ they make it back. Have faith, sister.” Camila retorted, although she was unable to mask the fear in her voice. 

Beatrice, with the help of Camila, slowly sat up. Her head spun, sickenly, and she turned away to vomit into the sand. 

“How many minutes has it been?” She asks after wiping her mouth. 

“I’m not sure; at least fifteen.” Camila whispered. Each of them sat, silently, after that. They were so still, one could have almost mistaken them for statues. Save for Camila, who mouthed prayers to herself, inaudibly. 

Ava took a deep breath, eyes closed, as Lilith looked on. With a severe and sudden motion, moments before the demons would have crested the wall, Ava conjured a massive shield, extending several feet in every direction. Golden light burned through the dark surroundings, completely out of place.

Ignoring the burning of the halo in her back, Ava stepped forward. The demons arrived, trying to claw their way through, although they were unsuccessful. Another step forward. Lilith followed behind her, anticipating the need for a quick getaway. 

As the halo drained, the shield flickered for a moment, almost letting demons through. Ava gritted her teeth as sweat dripped down her face. She didn’t have much time left. She took another step forward, then one more. Lilith continued to follow, feeling as though time were moving in slow motion. Her claws were out, braced for battle, just in case.

Finally, Ava managed to take the final step, pushing the shrieking demons over the edge. Horrible screams filled the air as they fell.  _ Hey, I did it!  _ She thought, as the shield and halo went dark. Ava dropped to her knees, but Lilith quickly scooped her up, as though she weighed nothing. 

“Oh, so  _ romantic. _ ” Ava whispered a smile on her face before she passed out. Lilith couldn’t help but chuckle as she teleported them back to the beach, eager to leave this awful place. 


	16. Threats

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The sisters return to Cat's Cradle, only to get a vague warning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who you play as in mario kart says A LOT about you as a person

Camila helped Beatrice stand, gently guiding her towards the back seat of the car. Mary opened the door for them and then jogged around to open the door on the other side. With an uncharacteristic tenderness, Lilith laid Ava onto the seat. She still hadn’t woken. 

“Once again, we find ourselves bloody and disgusting, fleeing from the site of a demon attack. Truly on brand.” Mary commentated, as she got into the driver’s seat. Beatrice couldn’t help but laugh, her head was pounding but she felt weirdly giddy at the same time. 

“What’s wrong with her?” Lilith asked, looking at Beatrice with a confused, yet concerned, expression. 

  
“Concussion, probably.” Camila said, moving a finger in front of Beatrice’s eyes. “But I’m not a doctor.” 

“If everyone could just hold it together until we get back, I would really appreciate it.” Mary’s sarcasm was beyond obvious. 

“Lilith, you don’t need to answer if you don’t want to, but what happened? Why did you leave?” Camila asked with a slight tremble in her voice. 

“Yeah. Speaking of which, if you  _ ever  _ do something that  _ fucking stupid  _ again, I will kill you myself, okay?” Mary added, while giving Lilith a  _ look.  _

Lilith sighed and took a deep breath before replying. “It was getting too dangerous. Every time a higher order demon is summoned, we risk discovery. Not only discovery, we risk death. It seems like we are barely held together as it is…” She trailed off, feeling tears in her eyes. Lilith surprised herself with the sudden outburst of emotion. Camila put a hand on her shoulder.

“I wanted to protect you guys…” Lilith continued, deciding to let the tears fall freely. They left streaks in the blood and grime that coated her angular face. “I wanted to do the right thing.”

“You did the right thing, even if you do scare the shit out of me sometimes.” Mary took one of her hands off the wheel and grabbed Lilith’s.

“Ava was amazing down there. I wish you had seen it.” Lilith whispered while turning to look at Ava’s unconscious body.

“What did she do?” Camila asked with an intense interest. 

“You know how Ava has been able to generate small shields, like she did in battle today?” Mary and Camila nodded. “It was like that…” Lilith closed her eyes and it was like she was there again, howling demons and all. “Except the shield was the size of a barn.”

“Holy shit…” Mary whispered. 

“Why?” Camila wondered, curious as to why the shield would need to be so much bigger than the demon they had just faced. 

“When we got there… It called in... _ Reinforcements _ . We would have been ripped to shreds if it weren’t for Ava; there were dozens, if not hundreds, of demons coming for us.”

“Again, I feel the need to reiterate this,  _ do not do that again.”  _ Mary commanded. 

“Mary, please. I wasn’t trying to be reckless. It felt like the right thing to do to save my sisters.” Lilith pressed her head into the back of the seat, trying to push the images of  _ Hell  _ from her mind. 

“You did the right thing, Lilith.” Camila added with a kind smile. 

Beatrice had been listening to the entire conversation, although she hadn’t spoken. The pounding in her head made speech seem impossible for the moment. After the conversation had tapered off, Camila pressed two painkillers into her hand, along with a bottle of water. Beatrice took them, awkwardly, and rested her head against the window, hoping for a moment’s respite from the pain. 

As she sat, motionless, Camila tried to gently clean the blood from her face and other wounds. Beatrice barely registered it, instead, she was thinking about Ava. Ava, who was crumpled on the other side of the back seat. Ava, who apparently, is crazy powerful. Beatrice smiled as she realised that she had already known that. 

“Why are you smiling Bea?” Camila whispered as she worked. 

“Because… Ava is the best.” Beatrice obviously didn’t have all of her usual walls up and her reply caused everyone to laugh. 

“The truth comes out.” Mary declared with a dramatic flair.

“Okay, stop laughing. Camila, let me clean up your face now.” Beatrice felt like a captive inside her own brain; she didn’t have the ability to precisely choose her words or fully reason through everything. It was torture. 

“No offense, Bea, but I’ll think I’ll have Lilith do it.” Camila responded. 

“I’m offended.” Beatrice jokes, resting her head back on the window. Lilith turned around in her seat to start cleaning Camila’s brutal injury. 

“You need stitches.” Lilith stated, simply, after cleaning away a surprising amount of blood.

“I figured as much. I think we’ll all be spending some quality time in the infirmary together once we get back to Cat’s Cradle.”

Their return, however, wasn’t as smooth as one would have hoped. Several black, militarised SUVs lined the entryway to the main building. 

“Swiss Guard?” Mary asked. Lilith and Camila nodded simultaneously. “Oh,  _ joy _ .”

“What should we do?” Camila wondered aloud as they began getting out of the car.

“Walk in and head straight for the office. We’re in no shape to fight right now.” Lilith stated.

To say that the sisters were shocked to see Pope Duretti standing in Mother Superion’s office would be an understatement. The sudden arrival of five bloodied and tired nuns, however, was likely a surprise as well. As they entered the large, stone office, the tension in the air became immediately palpable. 

“Sisters, nice of you to join us. Please close the door behind you.” Duretti’s greeting was calm and polite, although his tone was anything but. Mother Superion shot them a look of warning. 

“Your holiness.” Beatrice greeted him, bowing slightly and hating herself for it. Respect for the leaders of the church was drilled into her since early childhood and the  _ habit  _ was not one she could repress. At least, not at the moment. The others stared at her in shock. Except Ava, who was slung across Lilith’s back, having still not woken up. 

“Nice to see that someone remembers their manners. As I was just telling Mother Superion here, I think that your team may have  _ accidentally  _ gotten into something that wasn’t your concern.” He said this pointedly, his allusion obvious. 

“Is that so?” Mary asked with unmistakable venom in her voice. She cocked her shotgun and the distinctive noise filled the room. Pointing it at Duretti’s face, she asked a follow-up question. “Tell me why I shouldn’t kill you now.”

Camila quickly pulled on Mary’s elbow, forcing her to lower the gun. “Mary, you can’t!”

“That’s right, Mary, you can’t.” Duretti imitated Camila’s tone in an insulting manner. “Even if you did kill me,  _ the pope,  _ it would be foolish to think that I wouldn’t have countermeasures in place.”

“Your holiness, I hope that you can forgive our indiscretion.” Mother Superion spoke formally and with respect, yet it was hollow. 

“I am a man of  _ God.  _ Thus, I am nothing if I cannot forgive.” His smile was disturbingly creepy. “Just know, one more slip up, one more lack of judgement…” He turned towards the girls. “And excommunication will seem like a pleasant vacation.” Duretti directed his attention towards Lilith specifically, although he kept an eye on Mother Superion as well. “You’re not the only one who knows how to make the journey  _ below. _ ”

Lilith looked as though she was about to jump out of her skin. Before she could react, however, Mother Superion was inches from Duretti. The sisters watched in amazement as she closed the distance between them in a mere moment. For the first time since he had entered the office, his face cracked, showing his fear. With a fluid and practiced motion, Mother Superion flipped her cane around, pointing it straight at Duretti’s heart. 

“Careful, the Swiss Guard is just outside the door. They’d kill you for this.” He seemed unphased as he spoke. 

“Maybe. But it would be a cause worth dying for.” Mother Superion replied, her face drawn. 

“Stay out of this, it’s bigger than you realise.” Having gotten the final word in, Pope Duretti turned and left, calling his guards with him. No one moved for several minutes, until they were sure he had left the building. 

“ _ Jesus Christ.”  _ Mary mumbled.

“Mary…” Mother Superion warned, before sighing. She sat back down behind the desk. “All of you just… Head down to the infirmary. We’ll talk about this when everyone is ready and able.” Her voice sounded tired, but none of the sisters argued with her. Instead, they left the office and headed down the hallway. It felt like a march of defeat.


	17. Hopeless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ava wakes up and learns of Duretti's visit. Each sister spends some time alone before a covert meeting with Mother Superion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: ~2 sentences of self-harm in the middle-ish section. be safe and smart. <3

Beatrice spent two agonising days in the infirmary, in the bed next to Ava’s. The pain, she could handle. Not knowing if Ava would wake up - that was what scared her. She had several visitors during the day, Camila had snuck her in a stack of books, but the nights were lonely. In the empty, dark room, she laid alone, praying to anyone that would hear her. To  _ God,  _ perhaps, that Ava would wake up. In the late afternoon of the third day, Beatrice’s prayers were answered. 

“Beatrice?” A quiet voice rasped. Beatrice dropped the book she had been reading and was at Ava’s bedside in a moment. Long golden rays of light shone through the high windows of the room, bathing Ava in golden light. Fitting. 

“Ava?” Beatrice asked, her voice trembling. Gently, she took one of Ava’s hands in her own.

“Oh, Beatrice…” Ava reached her other hand up, softly running it over Beatrice’s bruised forehead. A U-shaped gash sat, cleanly stitched up, at the center of the technicoloured bruise. “Your beautiful face…” 

“You’ve been…  _ Asleep  _ for three days, and the first thing you mention is my face?” Beatrice was frustrated with the attention, suddenly feeling unworthy of love. 

“Of course.” Ava replied confidently, before her face fell. “Three…  _ days _ ?”

“Three days.” Beatrice reiterated, reflecting on the quiet conversations between her sisters, discussing horrible  _ what-ifs _ . 

“I’m sorry.” Ava whispered. Her face looked absolutely defeated. 

“Don’t apologise. I - we were worried. Lilith told us what happened  _ down there _ …” Beatrice trailed off, unsure of how to continue her sentence. 

“It was awesome!” Ava sat up, her face suddenly alight. “Exhausting and terrifying, but  _ awesome. _ ” 

“So I’ve heard.” Beatrice laughed, despite herself, at Ava’s pure excitement.

“I don’t think you would be a fan of  _ Hell,  _ honestly.” The way Ava referred to her traumatic experiences so flippantly frustrated Beatrice to no end. 

“Ava…” Beatrice warned, her face giving away more information than she would have liked. 

“Wait…” Ava wasn’t stupid, she knew there was more going on than she realised. “What are you not telling me?” Beatrice sighed, unwilling to explain the dire situation immediately. 

“We’ll explain later.”

“We never just,  _ win _ , do we?” Ava asked with an unmistakable sadness in her voice. 

“It seems like it… But I’m happy to have you back with us.” Beatrice replied. 

She felt conflicted internally, as though her thoughts were moving in several different directions simultaneously. Obviously, she was fearful for the future, but also she was almost overwhelmed with her love for Ava at that moment. This was compounded by the fact that she had spent the last few days praying for Ava to wake up, while also wondering whether she was worthy of being loved in return. 

“I’m happy to be back.” Ava told her. Beatrice’s thoughts were shattered for the moment; sometimes when Ava spoke to her she found it hard to think at all. Instead of replying, Beatrice leaned over and kissed Ava, hard. Ava was surprised, for a second, but she kissed Beatrice back. There was a desperate hunger between them - a raw and emotional connection. 

“Ahem.” A cough split them apart, as they both blushed furiously. Lilith stood in the doorway, looking tired, although a small smile played across her face. Gracefully, she crossed the room, taking a seat on an empty bed beside Ava. Mary and Camila joined them shortly after.

“Looks like sleeping beauty has decided to grace us with her presence, finally.” Mary jokes, although her relief at seeing Ava awake is palpable. 

“Emphasis on  _ beauty. _ ” Ava replied cheekily. Lilith rolled her eyes but Camila stifled a laugh. 

“Beatrice, have you told Ava what happened?” Lilith asked.

“No, I wanted all of you to be here as well.” 

“Understandable.” Camila offered Beatrice a smile before directing her focus towards Ava. “Duretti was here, when we got back.” Camila’s face fell as she remembered Duretti. 

“He wasn’t  _ just  _ here, he knew. He told us to stay out of this. Well, threatened us if we didn’t.” Mary looked angry as she spoke. 

Ava took a moment to look at her sisters before she spoke. Mary and Lilith seemed relatively unscathed from battle, although they both looked tired and angry. Camila, however, sported a long line of stitches across her forehead and up into her hairline. Beyond that, the look on her face as she recounted Duretti’s visit made Ava feel hopeless.

“He set the trap for us, didn’t he?” Ava felt hollow as she spoke.

“He didn’t explicitly say so but it was certainly implied.” Beatrice replied, hoping that her hazy recollection of the conversation was correct. 

“Most likely, he did. Or ordered someone else to do it. Regardless, Duretti said that if we continue trying to stop the rituals, excommunication would be the least of our worries.” Lilith added.

“What does that… Oh.” The realisation hit Ava like a ton of bricks and she felt much guiltier than she already had. 

“He also told Lilith that she wasn’t the only one who could make the journey to  _ Hell,  _ which is news to me, at least.” Mary concluded, thereby having filled Ava in on all that she had missed. 

“There are a few references…” Camila had a faraway look in her eyes. “In the oldest archives in the library…”

“The  _ Hell Walkers! _ ” Beatrice chimed in, remembering a passage she had read several months ago when doing research for a different mission. At the same time, she was grateful that her brain seemed to be working more normally again, at least somewhat. Camila gave her a knowing look. 

“For the non-genius sisters in the room, do you care to fill us in?” Mary asked.

“There are… I’m hesitant to call them accounts… Legends is perhaps a better word.  _ Hell Walkers  _ were rumoured to be so holy, so divine, that they could cross into both  _ Heaven  _ and  _ Hell  _ at will.” Camila began explaining. 

“In the old stories, remnants of the original Catholicism,  _ Hell Walkers  _ could make the journey because they were saving the souls of the damned. In the same respect, they travelled to  _ Heaven  _ to commune with  _ God. _ ” Beatrice continued the explanation. 

“I don’t know… Well, anything about religion, but… Duretti doesn’t seem like a godly man, pope or not.” Ava was correct in her assertion, despite her trepidation. 

“Agreed. This theory also seems like a long shot, at best.” Lilith added. Her face was dark and she seemed far away, even while participating in the conversation. 

“I wouldn’t even call it a theory.” Camila added, although she looked crestfallen at the realisation.

“It doesn’t matter. If Duretti, or his people, can access  _ Hell…  _ Then we have a bigger problem that we know.” Beatrice concluded, frustrated at the severe lack of options.

“Why can’t we just kill Duretti?” Ava wondered aloud.

“See? This is why Ava’s my favourite!” Mary gestured towards the halo bearer. No one else laughed. 

“We can’t kill him.” Mother Superion said, having suddenly appeared in the doorway. Sunlight from the hallway framed her silhouette in the doorway, an intimidating black mass, granting her presence some extra drama. “At least, not yet.”

“What did you have in mind?” Beatrice respectfully asked. 

“We shouldn’t talk about this here. It isn’t out of the realm of possibility that Duretti has spies within our midst. Meet me in Ava’s room tonight, at midnight.”

“Wait, what?” Ava was confused.

“The halo bearer’s hidden chamber might be the only safe place, the only unmonitored space, left at Cat’s Cradle.” Mother Superion replied. 

As night fell, each sister spent time in solidarity, rather than together. Weeks of worry, injury, and fighting had left everyone with their own, personal demons to slay. Ava spent the hours until midnight alternating between two activities. Neither of which were particularly healthy or productive. 

In her famously poor handwriting, Ava scratched out a letter to Beatrice. Then, another for each of her sisters. This latest fight had shaken her, made Ava realise how death could close in on her at any time. If she were to not survive whatever Duretti had planning for them, she wanted her newfound family to have one last piece of her. It hadn’t been that long since Ava lay anonymous at St. Michael’s, but she truly had found a family here. 

Between writing each morbid letter, Ava paced around the room, uncharacteristically angry.  _ Just when you think you’ve succeeded, you haven’t. I hate Duretti, I hate this halo, I hate this room, I hate these fucking demons. How many more times can we survive battles like these?  _ Ava threw a fist into the stone wall of her room. Then a kick, then an elbow. Her hits became pathetically ugly and undisciplined - not unlike her emotional outburst. Blood splattered across the wall; the halo healed the damage away a moment later. 

_ That didn’t help.  _ Ava continued her pacing, more frustrated at herself now than she had been before.  _ I want to end this. No, I need to end this. The five of us can’t go on like this. Either a demon kills us or…  _ Ava didn’t want to think of the other possibilities. She stopped pacing for a moment and tried to take a deep breath. As much as she wished to talk to someone,  _ to Beatrice,  _ Ava knew she needed to keep this to herself. Everyone had enough to deal with as it is.  _ Toughen up, Ava. Not everything is about you. You have to deal with this alone, figure it out.  _

Mary found herself at Shannon’s grave, one of many visits she had made in the last few weeks. “Hi again.” Mary began, sitting cross legged on the ground. “I hope you’re doing well…” Mary trailed off, feeling slightly stupid. “I’ve never wanted to believe in  _ God,  _ in religion, more than I do right now. To know that you are somewhere happy, somewhere safe… To be able to know for sure…” Tears fell from her face. 

“Everything is insane right now. I know you and I have had many  _ back against the wall  _ moments before, but there’s never been anything like this. Not even close. Ava is a powerful halo bearer, maybe the most powerful we’ve ever seen, but she’s not the leader you were. I think if you were here, you would tell me I need to step into that role myself.” Mary laughed as she cried. “If you’re watching, I hope you are watching over us.  _ God  _ knows we’ll need it.”

After a few quiet moments, Mary stood up. Under her breath, she whispered a quick prayer. Despite her own beliefs, she knew that Shannon would have appreciated the gesture. 

“I love you, Shannon. In this life  _ and  _ the next.” Dark was falling around her but Mary trudged back to Cat’s Cradle slowly, with her head hung low.

In the library, Camila sat at her favourite table. Various books were scattered around her, although currently, she was looking out the window. Sunset had painted the sky with a wide range of hues, from purple to red and everything in between. Normally, Camila found it easy to stay optimistic and have faith in both her sisters and the mission. Duretti’s visit, however, had shaken her. 

Prior to their latest battle and Duretti’s visit, Camila had thought that she was one journal entry away from a discovery. Maybe a counter ritual, a secret weapon, something - anything that would give them an edge in a seeming unwinnable war. Camila turned away from the window to look at the desolate pile of books. For the first time, almost unconsciously, she feared that they would lose. The thought sent a shiver down her spine. 

Lilith, like Ava, stayed within the confines of her room. A mess of papers lay across her desk and spread onto the floor, each of them depicting a hellish scene. Chunks of charcoal sat in a dish next to Lilith’s hunched form, occasionally she would switch out the one she was using for another. A simple colour palette, mostly blacks and reds, were blended together on each page. 

It was messy, perhaps, but the speed at which Lilith produced each page made the drawings seem more angry than rushed. She worked almost manically, unaware of her surroundings as she laboured over each drawing. In her mind, she was back in  _ Hell,  _ fighting through the demons and the darkness. After hours of this, Lilith stopped, looking at the mess she created. 

With a shockingly sudden movement, she grabbed the bowl of charcoals, throwing it against the wall. It shattered with a dramatic noise. Lilith laughed, although there was no humour in it. Hastily, she pushed all the papers from the desk and kicked everything into a pile on the floor. A flick of her claws later, all that remained was an ashy pile. Lilith opened the window to let the smoke out and the cool breeze from the ocean filled the room. It seemed to calm her, for the moment, allowing for some quieter moments of reflection. 

Beatrice, thankfully, was given permission to leave the infirmary that afternoon. She wasn’t permitted back at training for another few days, but she could at least take a walk. The evening air was cool as she methodically walked through Cat’s Cradle’s many fields and groves. Her head still didn’t feel back to normal, but it no longer was filled with a constant pounding and she could string together complex thoughts again. Beatrice was grateful for this. 

Despite the looming threats that hung on the horizon, Beatrice found herself thinking mostly of Ava as she walked. Only a minority of these thoughts were romantic, although it would be dishonest to say that none of them were. More prominently, Beatrice realised that she was incredibly proud of Ava’s progress. In a short time, she had grown immensely. Ava’s initial flightiness that had caused Beatrice and her sisters grief had completely vanished. Instead, it was replaced by a warrior’s spirit, ready to stand and fight. 

For all the good in Ava, however, there were also new traits that caused Beatrice to worry. Repeated journeys to  _ Hell  _ couldn’t be good for Ava or Lilith, it was obvious that they both bore the emotional scars. Beyond that, Ava carried such a heavy guilt that it seemed unbearable at times. Beatrice sighed and stopped walking for a moment. 

“Perhaps Ava isn’t the only one who’s changed…” Beatrice whispered, to herself, as she began walking again. In a rare moment of personal reflection, Beatrice recognised her own differences. Although she was still hesitant to share information about herself, she did so more readily than ever before. Most starkly, however, was a change that Beatrice never thought she would see in herself. She was in  _ love.  _

With a deep breath, she remembered the day she took her vows. Years of study and self-enforced isolation, culminated in what had ultimately been an anticlimactic ceremony. Joining the OCS had given her a purpose and a true family - even if hate was the driving factor behind it. Like all of her sisters, Beatrice bore her own scars, physical and otherwise.

  
In the twilight field, Beatrice made a new vow, to herself. Whatever had brought her to the OCS initially didn’t matter anymore. She was here now, fighting for the  _ right  _ side, working to protect her sisters. Not just them, she realised, but the fate of the entire world likely hinged on their success. Beatrice tried to force herself to have faith in their success, but given the information she had, the logic wouldn’t provide such a conclusion. Thus, it was no surprise that her faith felt hollow. Beatrice couldn’t help but feel guilty for that, as though she had done something wrong.


	18. Please, Let Me In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mother Superion reveals some of her secrets. Beatrice and Ava have a discussion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. Should I make a 3rd (and final) installment to this series? I have a bit more that i would like to explore, if people want that. Let me know, ya? Also I need to know cuz it will effect how I end this work. Okay, drink water.

As promised, everyone met in Ava’s room at midnight. Beatrice had been the first to arrive, a few minutes early. Ava’s unwillingness to meet Beatrice’s eyes, along with the bloodstained wall, made it obvious that she was struggling to cope with the stress of the situation. Given everything, this was more than understandable. Beatrice opened her mouth to tell Ava this, to hold her, to tell her it was okay; but Camila’s sudden arrival interrupted any potential conversation. 

No one spoke as they waited for the rest of the group. Even Camila, who was normally the most hopeful of them all, seemed crushed. It was as if the air had been pushed out of the room by the weight of the odds being stacked against the sister warriors. Mary, Lilith, and Camila arrived shortly afterwards, though, interrupting everyone’s dark thoughts. 

“Ava, if you would.” Mother Superion asked, gesturing towards the wall. One by one, Ava phased everyone into the secret room, save for Lilith, who teleported in to join them. As Ava did this, she tried desperately not to think of Adriel, unsuccessfully. Thankfully, Mother Superion’s news provided a distraction, albeit not a positive one. 

“Over the last few days I’ve collected some interesting information about Duretti and this  _ shadow network  _ that he seems so invested in. I have some old contacts, trustworthy people, who passed along the information. We should all be thankful for that, as it was incredibly dangerous for them to do so.” Mother Superion began, her face being lit by the Divinium in the middle of the room. She looked more tired and stressed than the sisters had ever seen her. Despite that, there was a spark of hope in her eyes.

“Is this information  _ useful _ ?” Mary questioned with an edge in her voice.

“Watch your tone, Mary. I know you all have been through a lot recently, but that’s no excuse for disrespect.” Mother Superion chastised Mary, sighed, and then started again. “But yes, it is. Duretti has been building a small, elite group of Swiss Guard members who are rumoured to have  _ abilities  _ not unlike those possessed by Lilith.”

“How is that possible?” Camila asked, looking back and forth between Lilith and Mother Superion. 

“He must be sending them to  _ Hell  _ intentionally…” Lilith offered. She looked furious. 

“Regardless of  _ how  _ he’s doing it, this section of the Guard is loyal to him, not to the papacy. If the rumours are true, they will be incredibly dangerous.” Mother Superion replied.

“What does this have to do with the demon summoning?” Beatrice wondered aloud. “If he has a powerful team to do his bidding, why bother with the rituals?” 

“Maybe they’re two facets of the same plan; two sides of the same coin. It’s his personal protection in case things get out of hand?” Camila tried to help Beatrice reason through the possibilities. 

“If he knows how dangerous this can get, why bother summoning demons in the first place?” Mary asked, her voice full of frustration.

“Imagine if a higher order demon was set loose, especially in a bigger city. Destruction, death, and fear would have people flocking to join the Church in droves. Duretti becomes even more powerful in his position and can control the public’s perception about… Well, nearly everything. It’s insidious.” Beatrice spoke quietly, almost in disbelief of her own words. 

Ava looked at Beatrice, her mind swimming with a thousand thoughts at once. Fear, of course, at the depth of Duretti’s plan. But also admiration, at Beatrice’s intelligence and her ability to explain everything so well. Her carefully chosen words and soft voice, despite the subject matter, were a salve on Ava’s broken soul. 

“Exactly, Beatrice. Well reasoned. I don’t know if it’s possible to dismantle the entire network of  _ shadow clients…  _ But if we can force Duretti into a confrontation… If we could force him into revealing his secrets, it might destabilise his position as pope. As you all know…” Mother Superion paused, looking pointedly at Ava, “The pope cannot be involuntarily removed from power.” 

“Wait, what?” Ava asked.

“The laws of the Church have no true way of removing a pope from power, should he not want to leave the papacy. Historically, it has happened, but it's incredibly rare. If Duretti were to face extreme pressure, which he would if his plan were revealed, then he would likely have to resign. Nothing is written in stone, though.” Lilith answered, demonstrating her knowledge of the Catholic Church and its traditions. 

“Again, if we kill him, it's not an issue.” Mary added. 

“If we get caught killing the  _ pope  _ without exposing him… You might as well shoot us all right now and get it over with.” Mother Superion snapped at her. Mary hung her head.

“What are we going to do then?” Ava whispered, feeling overwhelmed.

“We’re going back to the Vatican, aren’t we?” Camila asked with caution in her voice. 

“Not yet, but soon.” Mother Superion looked down. She trusted her girls; their skill, their wit, and their abilities. Still, she felt immensely guilty about sending them back into what would surely be a dangerous confrontation. 

“When is soon?” Lilith questioned.

“That remains to be seen.” Mother Superion replied, cryptically. “The less you know right now, the better. I’ll have tasks assigned for each of you in the morning. For now, you’re all dismissed. Please get some rest, you’ll all need to be in the best condition possible once we decide to move on this. Physically  _ and  _ mentally.” She added the last part with a pointed look towards both Ava and Lilith. 

“Ava, do you want to tell me about the blood on the wall?” Beatrice asked after the meeting as she laid next to Ava. 

“No.”

“Please…” Beatrice whispered, resting a hand on Ava’s cheek. “Let me in.”

Ava exhaled sharply before speaking. “I’m scared, Beatrice.” Her voice shook. “I’m so  _ fucking  _ scared… I’m not  _ good enough  _ to be the warrior nun… I’m just not  _ good enough.” _

“Ava, you’re -” Beatrice began, before being interrupted by Ava.

“Stop, whatever you’re going to say, just _stop.”_ Her voice had a sharp bite, making Beatrice flinch. “Maybe I am a powerful warrior nun, but I’m not a hero, I’m not even a leader. If what Camila says is true, it makes my failings even worse, because despite my abilities… _so many people_ have died and I couldn’t save them.” Ava’s eyes were overflowing with tears. 

“Ava, listen to me.” Beatrice pulled Ava closer, until their foreheads were nestled together on the pillow. “I don’t have all the answers, but I can tell you with absolute certainty that you are being too hard on yourself. Even the best halo bearers in history couldn’t save everyone.” Beatrice took a deep breath, before continuing. “I don’t know if this will help, but you are the only one who thinks of you like this.”

“ _ Really?”  _ Ava whispered as she gently cried in Beatrice’s arms. 

“Yes Ava, are you serious?! Lilith and Mary might think you’re a bit frustrating sometimes, but they both love you and respect you. Camila adores you, she tells the younger sisters about how you are a hero at every opportunity!” Beatrice was slightly exasperated. 

“What do you think?” Ava asked, quietly, as she pressed herself into Beatrice’s strong form.

“You know what I think.” Beatrice paused for a moment, savouring the feeling of Ava against her. “I love you. I’ve spent most of my life convincing myself that I didn’t want, or need, love but… Then  _ you. _ ”

“I love you, Beatrice.”

“And Ava?” 

“Yes?”

“I think you’re an amazing halo bearer. It baffles me how much you’ve improved in a short amount of time. The power that you are able to not only conjure, but also control, is shocking. Every day with you amazes me. You amaze me, Ava.” Beatrice smiled, realising that this was the first time she had admitted this out loud. 

“Pride is a sin, you know.” Ava jokes, returning Beatrice’s infectious smile.

“Pride in oneself is a sin. Not in others.” 

“Oh.” Ava mumbles. “One more thing…”

“Yes?” Beatrice asks with curiosity.

“There’s a stack of letters in the desk… Just in case.... Well,  _ you know _ . I hope you don’t have to read yours, especially since there are a lot of references that I think will go over your head.”

“Ava.” Beatrice was cold all of a sudden, unsure of how to feel. “Please.”

“I know, it’s morbid. And I’m sorry for joking about it. It’s just… If I  _ die,  _ I want you to have one last piece of me, one last thought… Something to hold on to. Maybe that’s stupid…”

“It’s not stupid. It’s dark… But it’s not stupid. In a weird way, it’s beautiful. Yet, I truly hope I never have to read it.” Beatrice replied, as tears slipped down her face.

“I hope so too. I’m sorry.”

“Next time, maybe you can let me in? Talk to me sooner. Please.” 

“I promise.” Ava whispered.


	19. The Discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beatrice and Camila make a startling discovery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i lowkey ship camila and lilith. dont @ me

Camila was reading before bed, trying to calm down enough to sleep after the stressful meeting with Mother Superion and her sisters. A knock on the door startled her. Rising to open it, she was surprised to find Lilith, standing in the dark hallway.

“I’m ready to talk.” She whispered. Camila ushered her in without a word. 

Unlike Ava’s bare room, Camila’s was crowded, but not messy. Neat stacks of books filled the floor around the desk and dozens of small plants adorned the windowsill. Bright tapestries displaying nature scenes and constellations covered the rough, stoney walls of the room. A handmade quilt covered the bed, a mix of different patterned fabrics that somehow seemed to work together. It was a cosy, kind, and bright room - a perfect reflection of its occupant. 

“You can sit down, Lilith.” Camila offered, gesturing to her cosy looking bed. Compared to Lilith’s room, Camila’s was an explosion of colour. Awkwardly, Lilith perched on the edge of the bed, as though she needed to be ready to run away at a moment’s notice. 

“I’m ready to talk.” Lilith repeated, mostly to convince herself. “I think these repeated journeys to  _ Hell  _ haven’t been good for me… For my mind. For my soul.” 

“I know. I’m sorry.” Camila acknowledged.

“I feel so… Torn up inside. As if, I don’t know who I am anymore. I’ve spent my life within the Church, within the OCS. I’m a nun. We fight  _ demons. _ ” Lilith paused, taking a breath after speaking quickly. 

“Lilith, please. Come sit down properly.” Camila patted the bed. Lilith obliged, sliding across the colourful quilt. She leaned against the headboard, next to Camila.

“I’m fighting for the Church and I am part of the Church. I always have been. Yet, my powers come from  _ Hell,  _ from demons. Am I a demon? Am I now doomed to be a part of the darkness, thrown from my own path?” Lilith felt a single tear fall from her face. 

Camila took one of Lilith’s clenched fists in her own, gently pulling each finger free. “I can understand why you would feel that way. You have to trust that  _ God  _ has a plan for you. But moreso, that you have a plan for  _ you. _ ” Camila stated, simply.

“What do you mean?” Lilith asked.

“ _ God  _ has a plan for all of us, but sometimes, his plan is simply to give you the strength that you need to get you through hardships.” Camila explained her meaning as she worked on opening up Lilith’s other fist. 

“Oh.” 

“You’re incredibly strong, Lilith.” 

Lilith didn’t reply right away. Instead, she closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Camila’s words echoed in her head. Already, she felt calmer than she had in weeks.

“Thank you, Camila.” Lilith whispered. 

“You’re welcome. I’m glad you finally came to talk. We’ve all been worried about you.” Camila admitted, thinking of the conversations that she had with her other sisters.

“You have?”

“Subtlety has never been one of your strong suits. But is it so wrong to have people in your life who care about you? Who love you?” Camila asked.

“No, but…”

“But, nothing. You are strong enough to bear this burden, sister. You’re not strong enough to bear it  _ alone,  _ though.”

“I know.” Lilith sighed. “I know.”

Lilith woke up, sometime in the middle of the night, still leaning against Camila’s headboard. She stood, startled, and saw Camila lying on the other side of the bed, sleeping peacefully. Even in her sleep, Camila smiled. Lilith stood up gently, to avoid waking her. By the light of a single, still burning candle, Lilith found a piece of stationary and a pen from Camila’s desk. Hastily, she scrawled a note across the page.

_ Camila,  _

_ Thank you for talking with me tonight. I haven’t always been a good sister to you, or the others, and I’m sorry for that. You truly are the best of us. After talking with you, I feel better than I have in weeks. Seriously, thank you. _

_ Lilith.  _

She stood there, for a moment, wondering if she should leave the note or not. In the end, she did. After blowing out the last candle, Lilith gently pulled Camila’s quilt back over her, smiling as she cuddled into it. Silently, she exited the room, taking great care to shut the door. In the dark hallway, Lilith had a realisation. Her brief rest in Camila’s room had been nightmare free, the first time that had happened since… Well, she didn’t remember the last time. 

The morning came too fast, for everyone. It had been a long night, yet Mother Superion had made good on her promise of assignments. At breakfast, a younger nun had delivered each sister an index card, containing their assignments. 

“Training all day?” Mary groaned. “I don’t know about you guys, but I got basically no sleep.”

“I actually slept well, for once.” Lilith replied, smiling in Camila’s direction.

“My afternoon is blocked off for research, not training.” Camila noted, after returning Lilith’s smile.

“I have research all day.” Beatrice frowned, realising that she still had to wait two more days before she was allowed to resume full physical activity.

“I must be one of the cool kids, because I have all day training too!” Ava tried to give Mary a high five as she spoke, but Mary left her hanging. 

“Oh good. I’m so glad to finally be…  _ One of the cool kids. _ ” Lilith muttered sarcastically. Her rare joke drew a laugh from everyone at the table. 

That afternoon, Beatrice and Camila sat at the familiar table by the window, in the library. While they both tried to focus on their work, it was hard not to watch the others training in the courtyard. 

“Today feels a little more hopeful than yesterday, doesn’t it?” Camila asked quietly.

“It does.” Beatrice agrees, without looking away from the window. 

Eventually, they managed to turn their attention back to the research. While neither of them had managed to dig up information on Duretti, they  _ had  _ found several references that could be useful. For instance, there were several accounts of clergymen who actively tried to visit realms beyond earth, such as  _ Heaven  _ and  _ Hell.  _ Multiple mentions of otherworldly abilities also stemmed for these entries, which Beatrice created an index of. 

In addition, Camila spent an hour showing her the halo archive that she was working on. It was a digital timeline of each halo bearer, their unique abilities, achievements, and a translation of their journal entries into English.

“Wow, Camila. This is amazing.” Beatrice whispered, looking through the files on Camila’s computer. 

“Thank you, I’ve been working on it for a while. But, Bea? It only confirms what I’ve thought for a while…”

“Ava’s…  _ Different,  _ isn’t she?” Beatrice completed Camila’s sentence. 

“She’s  _ powerful,  _ Beatrice. Like, really powerful.”

“Don’t tell her, not yet, anyhow. Okay?” Beatrice asked, thinking of her and Ava’s conversation the night before. 

“Why?” Camila responded.

“The burden of the halo has been a lot on her lately. She feels as though she is failing in her duties.” Beatrice answered in a serious voice. 

“What? She’s done amazingly well!” Camila nearly shouted, in disbelief. 

“I know. Trust me, I know. But Ava doesn’t see it that way. People have still died and she’s killed personally, now. Each of those deaths weighs heavy on her soul, she thinks it’s entirely her fault. She knows that is powerful, which makes her feel like a failure, because she  _ thinks  _ she could have prevented those deaths.” Beatrice explained. She chose her words carefully.

“There is no way that Ava could have saved everyone… Not with what we have been through.” Camila looked out the window as she spoke, watching Ava and Lilith spar. 

“Again, I’m aware. I’m not opposed to you telling her. Just, wait until she is a little bit more stable. I’m sure in time, she’ll want to read each of these journal entries and learn about those who came before her. It really is an amazing project, sister.” 

“Thank you, Bea.”

After their conversation, Beatrice and Camila worked in silence for a while longer. Beatrice was looking for sources about demons and the rituals to summon them. Creating a finite list of demons, and their weaknesses, could prove useful in the coming days. Camila was looking for more references of the  _ Hell Walkers,  _ although she had found little so far. 

“Umm… Beatrice?” Camila asked with a voice full of fear. Beatrice froze. Camila rarely used her full name. 

“Yes?” Beatrice looked up as she spoke. Her eyes were full of worry.

“Does this look familiar? Does  _ he  _ look familiar?” Camila held up the book she had been reading, opened to a page with an early photograph of Pope Pius X and the clergy of the time. 

It was a smeary reproduction of an old photograph from 1903, but it was unmistakable. In the group of men gathered around the pope, a familiar face stood out from the rest of the cardinals. Duretti’s face. 


	20. The Best-Laid Plans...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A plan is decided upon and preparations are made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im glad everyone said they wanted a sequel to this, cuz that ending idea is a lot more SPICEY.

“This certainly complicates matters, doesn’t it?” Mother Superion asked, with a surprising calmness in her face. 

“That’s one way to put it…” Mary replied. 

“What can this mean?” Lilith wondered, looking at Camila and Beatrice who had spent the day researching. Everyone stood close together, gathered back in the halo bearer’s chamber. 

“It’s likely that Duretti…  _ Pope  _ Duretti isn’t human. At least, not entirely.” Beatrice explained clinically. Her mind was racing so fast that she felt ill, but she was determined not to show that outwardly. At least, not at the moment. It was becoming readily apparent, not just to Beatrice, that holding in emotions indefinitely wasn’t a viable option. 

“There’s a ton of possibilities, lots of reasons why he could still be alive. Without more information, we can’t know for sure.” Camila added. Her research had made that abundantly clear.

“Is anyone on team  _ kill the pope,  _ yet?” 

“For once, I’m leaning that way, Mary.” Mother Superion answered. “We have to be incredibly careful about this,, though.”

“When is his next official engagement?” Lilith looked as though she had the hint of an idea. 

“We can find out.” Mother Superion replied, unsure of the answer immediately. 

“Lilith, there are too many things that could go wrong!” Beatrice exclaimed, while everyone else was still several steps behind and confused. 

“But if it works…” Lilith shot back.

“But if  _ what  _ works?” Ava wonders, feeling completely out of her depth. 

“I think I know…” Camila began, before Beatrice could speak. “Lilith thinks that if we attack the  _ pope,  _ publically, we can force him to reveal himself. With clergy and civilian witnesses, no one would be able to deny it.”

“Exactly, Camila.” Lilith gave her a nod.

“Have you forgotten that the last time we went to the Vatican, we literally  _ blew it up?  _ Duretti has already shown that he has no regard for human life and a team of powerful, personal security. What would keep him from killing everyone there? A  _ lot  _ of innocent people could die.” Beatrice argued, trying not to let the angry stress creep into her voice, although she was unsuccessful. 

“Obviously, there’s a lot of problems that we would need to solve… But I don’t think it’s the worst idea, either.” Mary said after a few silent moments.

“There are a lot of  _ ifs. _ ” Mother Superion added, noncommittal.

“I don’t want anyone else to  _ die. _ ” Ava whispered. 

Beatrice sighed as Ava’s words echoed in her mind. “If we plan intelligently, we could minimise civilian casualties. Exposing Duretti, killing him, would likely prevent thousands of deaths. If not more…” 

“It’s a risk.” Camila offered.

“It’s more than a risk.” Mother Superion stated. “Your last assignment ended up being a trap. Nearly every mission ends with at least one of you severely injured…Not to mention the emotional cost...” She trailed off as her voice cracked, emotionally. 

“It’s a calculated risk. We have to decide if it’s worth it.” Lilith’s tone was gruff.

“It’s worth it.” Mary responded, matching Lilith’s tone. 

“I agree. We can’t rush into this though. It needs to be a well-executed mission, with a contingency plan for possible outcomes. It’s going to be a lot more complex than just going in and starting a fight.” Beatrice voiced her agreement.

“Some of the issues surrounding this plan are easier to resolve than others…” Camila began, as she thought about different scenarios. “But we can’t just  _ do nothing. _ ” Everyone looked at Ava, once Camila had finished speaking.

“I don’t exactly have a choice, do I?” Ava looked at her hands, then the floor. “It’s not that I  _ don’t  _ want to get rid of Duretti - I do. I just wish there were another way. At the same time, I trust all of you, and I know we can do this.” She paused for a moment, before looking up. There was a new fire in her eyes. “I’m in.”

As fate would have it, Duretti was scheduled to present at a conference in a few days. There would be thousands of attendees, both members of the church and civilians. It gave the sisters enough time to prepare, but only just. Each sister had a pile of work to do, between research, training, practicing, and planning - there was barely time for anything else. 

Lilith had teleported with Ava several times, but she had never tried to take anyone else. This was one of the biggest facets of their training. If she could successfully teleport all of them at once, it would provide a huge tactical advantage. Unsurprisingly, however, this proved to be a difficult task.

“Okay.” Lilith took a deep breath as she pressed her feet into the ground. Ava was standing on her right side, Camila on her left. Teleporting just the two of them, across the field, would be the first challenge.

“Remember, you’re a  _ beast. _ ” Ava whispered, trying to be encouraging. 

“Ava, be quiet. Camila, stop laughing. I’m trying to concentrate.” Lilith snapped as she closed her eyes. Mary and Beatrice looked on silently, expressions full of concern. 

Lilith squeezed Ava and Camila’s hands in her own, and in the next moment, they crackled into existence on the other side of the field. 

“Yeah! You did it!” Camila exclaimed. 

“It sure seems that way.” Lilith replied, allowing herself to smile. 

“Now what?” Ava asked.

“We go farther.” Lilith responded.

“You’re going to go all the way to the top of the hill?” Mary questioned.

"Yes. If we need to do this… Well, it’s not going to be a calm jaunt across an empty field.” Lilith replied. 

“Alright, fine. Okay.” Before Mary could say anything more, the three of them disappeared. In the hazy mirage of the midday sun, she saw them materialise atop the hill. Ava waved, dramatically, her movements exaggerated. 

A second later, they were back. Mary and Beatrice both released a breath that they didn’t necessarily realise they were holding. 

“Mary, will you please join us?” Lilith was grinning as she made her request. For once, she revelled in her abilities, instead of feeling cursed by them.

“Here we go.” Mary mumbled as she took Camila’s hand and joined the chain.

Beatrice watched, nervously, as Lilith blinked all of them to the hill and back. Logically, she knew that the plans she was laying alongside her sisters were sound, but she was anxious nonetheless. Under her breath, she whispered a few words of prayer, before being interrupted. 

Upon their return, Lilith’s smile fell from her face as she dropped to her knees. She closed her eyes as the horrible ringing filled her head. Ava reacted before anyone else, having seen this before. With speed, Ava pushed Mary and Camila back, using some of the halo’s power to propel them further across the grass. 

In the next moment, Ava knelt beside Lilith, as the halo glowed through her shirt. A golden shield erupted from within, covering her and Lilith with a dome of light. A muffled and muted explosion echoed inside, and the dome evaporated a moment later. Ava stood up and offered Lilith a hand. They were now standing in a small crater and they were both  _ filthy. _

“That was good!” Ava praised Lilith as they rejoined the group.

“Minus the exploding part at the end.” Lilith seemed tired, the colour gone from her face.

“We can work on that next time. It takes time.” Ava encouraged her, before spitting a bunch of dirt out of her mouth.

“Are you alright?!” Camila asked with panic in her voice.

“I am, although I can’t speak for Lilith.” Ava responded, with a surprising degree of calm.

“I’m fine.” Lilith paused for a second. “I’m sorry. I don’t know if I can do this.”

“Hey.” Mary began, setting a hand on Lilith’s shoulder. “You can’t do it  _ yet. _ ”

“You handled that well today, with Lilith.” Beatrice told Ava, much later. She had been reading, seated in Ava’s bed, but her mind kept wandering to the day’s events.

“You think so?” Ava asked, looking up at Beatrice. Unlike Beatrice, Ava hadn’t been reading. Instead, she had curled up against Beatrice, content to bask in her presence. 

“I do. You acted like a leader. You put yourself in harm’s way, protected the members of your team, and controlled the halo.” 

“Well, when you put it like that, it sounds pretty awesome.” Ava replied, nestling her head into Beatrice’s lap.

“Ava, if you could be serious  _ for a moment,  _ I would really appreciate it.” Beatrice told her, desperately trying to ignore Ava’s incessant cuddling. 

“Sorry, sorry.” Ava smiled. “Thank you. I should teach a leadership seminar.”

“We might not be quite there yet.” Beatrice answered, although she couldn’t help but laugh. Ava’s cuddling eventually won her over as well, and her book ended up on the bedside table instead of in her hands. 

By the next day, Lilith had managed to teleport all of them across the entirety of Cat’s Cradle, without exploding anything. 

“Absolute  _ beast! _ ” Ava shouted, the moment her feet hit the ground. 

“Stop calling me that!” Lilith told her, although she wasn’t angry.

“That was really good, though.” Camila added. Lilith brushed off the compliment, although she felt her cheeks flush in humility. 

“Now that we know Lilith can do this, we need to focus on other aspects of the plan.” Ava paused for dramatic effect. “It’s time that I learn how to drive.”

“Absolutely not.” Beatrice replied. 

“Ava, if we make it out of this alive, I promise that I’ll teach you how to drive. Okay?” Mary offered.

“Yes!” Ava jumped in the air, using the halo to hold herself in the air for a moment before dropping back down. 

“Alright. Ava, Camila, Lilith, you three have weapons training for the rest of the day. Please practice with whatever weapon you’re planning on bringing with you and  _ no messing around. _ ” Beatrice ordered. She was focused on the mission and was determined to do everything in her power to keep her sisters safe. 

“What are you and Mary doing?” Camila asked, curiously. 

“Other stuff, buddy. Don’t stress it.” Mary replied, coyly, before heading back towards the building. 

“You’ll see later.” Beatrice added, before following Mary.

Before dinner, Mary and Beatrice returned, making good on Beatrice’s promise. They stepped out of an expensive-looking red sports car. Each of them were dressed in civilian clothes, disguises, as they exited the vehicle.

“You  _ have  _ to let me drive now, come on!” Ava begged, while simultaneously admiring Beatrice’s effortless beauty.

“This is smart. I wouldn’t have thought of it.” Camila whispered with a look of admiration on her face. 

“Beatrice’s idea.” Mary added. “But it’s smart. Duretti knows what the OCS issued vehicles look like. This is, decidedly, not one of those.”

“It’s not inconspicuous.” Lilith muttered as she ran a finger over the glossy red finish. “But I like it. He won’t be looking for a red car, anyhow. All of the OCS vehicles are black.”

“That’s the plan.” Beatrice concluded.

That evening and the next day were packing with preparations. Everyone drilled their weapons skills, while Lilith and Ava also worked on controlling their powers. Weapons and supplies were packed away and disguises were chosen. Mother Superion prepared dossiers, thick with information that could be critical to the success of the mission. 

  
Despite this, there was a hint of fear that hung in the air. A slight thread of hopelessness, that no preparation would be enough, that every plan would be countered.  _ Faith  _ in the mission, and one another, became critical.


	21. ...Often Go Awry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A final confrontation occurs as the sisters return to the Vatican. What could go wrong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please join me in suffering

It was a tense and quiet car ride, although this surprised exactly no one. Neither Ava or Camila tried to make conversation, which was telling on its own. Each sister spent the interminable drive paralysed by their fears and deep in thought. Dark possibilities flooded their minds, making it nearly impossible to focus on the plan. Thankfully, as they closed in on the Vatican, Beatrice went over it again, thoroughly.

“There will be no room for error, or improvisation.” She concluded, after explaining everything for the last time. “If something goes wrong, something we didn’t anticipate, use your best judgement.”

“I think you may have covered every possibility, Bea.” Camila adds with kindness in her voice. 

“Statistically speaking that’s impossible…” Beatrice paused, realising that everyone was giving her a  _ look.  _ “But I understand your sentiment.” 

Ava held Beatrice’s hand for the last several minutes of the ride, a constant and comforting presence for both of them. Focusing on Beatrice helped Ava feel less anxious about the upcoming fight and there was  _ so much  _ to focus on. Beatrice’s hair was down, part of her disguise, and it hung in loose waves that framed her face. A face that, despite her best effort, Ava couldn’t seem to turn away from. A face that, even given hundreds of years, she would never tire of looking at. 

The car stopped. The awful inbetween had now come to an end; they had reached their destination. Trepidation filled their thoughts, yet there was a hint of excitement, victory  _ was  _ possible. All they had to do was fight for it. 

Mary had parked around the back of the building where the conference was being held. There were several reasons for this. Mainly, it gave them an easy escape route, should they need it. More importantly, however, it was out of the way of traffic. Foot traffic and vehicular traffic were congested throughout the city - although this was a constant in the Vatican. Their relatively secluded position allowed them to unpack their weapons and change their clothes without being hassled by security. It also allowed Ava to phase everyone through the outer wall of the building, one by one.  _ So far, so good.  _

Once they were in the building, they could blend in amongst the other nuns, although they took extra care to keep their heads down. The flowing layers of fabric provided ample coverage for the weapons each of them had smuggled in. Because Beatrice had insisted that they memorise the floorplan of the building, everyone knew where they were and where they were heading. No discussion was needed. 

Pope Duretti was scheduled to speak in less than five minutes, so they wasted no time in locating the main hall. Arriving earlier would have been too risky, as it would have provided the Swiss Guard more opportunities to locate them. Still, the tight timeline made everyone feel slightly on edge. Ava could feel the beads of sweat sliding down the back of her neck, even though her blood was running cold. 

“Hello, everyone!” Duretti greeted as he waved to the crowd. “Thank you for joining us today.” Everyone cheered while the sisters slipped through the crowd. 

“Are the guards around him the ones that Mother Superion warned us about?” Ava whispered into Camila’s ear as they wound their way through the throngs of people. 

“Most likely, but there’s no way to be sure. Not yet, at least.” She replied. 

Soon,  _ too soon,  _ they were in position and ready to strike. Lilith took Mary’s hand, teleporting her up to the stage. Before anyone, including Duretti or the Swiss Guard had time to react, a shotgun blast echoed through the massive room. A split second later, Lilith had brought her back into the now panicking crowd. Duretti’s body hung over the table, blood lazily dripping to the floor.

_ Oh my God.  _ Ava thought to herself, as time seemed to move in slow motion all around her.  _ We killed the pope. He seems dead, too. Could it have been a coincidence? A trick? Had this plan just doomed all of them to a swift death by execution? _

Pressure on Ava’s arm broke her from the panicked thoughts. It was Beatrice’s hand. With her eyes, she gestured towards the stage. The Swiss Guards who had been with Duretti on stage had evaporated, teleporting to each door in the massive hall, locking them. 

“What are they doing?” Ava asked Beatrice.

“I’m not sure… But whatever it is, they want an audience.”

Scared civilians and members of the church alike flooded to the edges to the room, as screams and cries flooded the room. A mass exodus of people revealed the sister warriors, as they were the only ones not fleeing towards the outskirts of the meeting hall. Swiss Guard members, who had just revealed themselves to be demonic, walked slowly towards them. The room went silent.

There were two Swiss Guard members for each of them, although they had faced worse odds before. Those odds got worse, however, when a horrible cracking sound filled the room. Duretti had stood up, and was now stretching out of his skin, breaking his bones and revealing his flesh. No one moved as he transformed, yet it was almost too horrifying to watch. 

As various body parts stretched, broke, and grew, a demon stood where Duretti had been a moment ago. It was double the size that the man had been, with a newly sprouted set of claws on each hand. His head was still human, mostly, although Duretti’s jaw had lengthened disconcertingly and the teeth had become fangs. Several onlookers vomited at the new appearance of the pope. 

Just as everything had stopped, it suddenly began again, as the Swiss Guards began to attack the sister warriors. Camila pulled her crossbow out and began launching bolt after bolt. Unfortunately, the guards were teleporting around most of her shots. A few of them had hit civilians, she realised, with a sick feeling. Camila didn’t have time to dwell on this, however, as her moment of empathy allowed one of them to knock her to the ground. He was on top of her then, teeth bared, until he suddenly went limp. Her crossbow had been loaded when he had hit her, so Camila had fired it into his stomach.  _ One down. _

Mary was thankful that she had spent more time on her combat skills over the past few weeks. She didn’t have time to reload after the guards teleported around her initial shots. Luckily, they didn’t manage to get a hit in either, as Mary dodged their attacks with a newfound grace. After several successful strikes, she managed to knock both of them down at once. Reloading as fast as she could, with shaky hands, Mary was only able to permanently knock down one of them.  _ Two down.  _

In a sick way, Lilith was enjoying her fight. She knew the exact extent of the Swiss Guards’ abilities, although she wielded her powers better. It was almost impossible to watch her fight, as it was constantly crackling and teleporting around the room. Several minutes passed before Lilith managed to get the best of them, but when she did, she took out both guards at once. As they realised that Lilith had similar abilities, they stood back to back, scanning the room. Her advanced speed and fighting technique allowed her to teleport in between them. Before they could react, she stuck a clawed hand through each of their chests. Two more colourfully dressed men hit the floor.  _ Four down.  _

Beatrice had been watching Ava and Lilith spar, for various reasons admittedly, but she had learned enough to predict how the guards would fight. Her assumptions were correct, of course, and she altered her fighting style to be as effective against them as possible. Graceful and fast movements allowed Beatrice to avoid every hit that was thrown at her, until she found an opportunity to strike back. A chance presented itself relatively quickly and two skilled throws from Beatrice allowed each knife to find it’s target.  _ Six down.  _

The near constant sparring with Lilith had left Ava with a fantastic advantage during this fight. Whatever the guards had expected from Ava when they tried to corner her, it certainly wasn’t her phasing through each of their attacks. When she paid attention to the flow of battle and focused on everything her sisters had taught her, she was untouchable. After throwing one of the guards off balance, Ava wielded the Divinium sword with ferocity, beheading him. Guilt flooded her mind as she thrusted her sword through the second guard, who had stopped fighting in horror.  _ Eight down, I’m sorry. _

With only two Swiss Guard members remaining, and five sister warriors, the fight concluded quickly. The smooth, stone floor of the room was soaked with blood in several spots. While the fight had raged on, Duretti had stood unmoving, watching them in his terrifying demon form. Everyone with the misfortune to be trapped inside the room watched with horror as he began to speak. 

“This was unexpected, I’ll give you that.” He admitted, with a much deeper voice than he had when human. “But I  _ will  _ kill all of you. And then, I will kill everyone in this room. When I walk out of here alone, it will look like a  _ miracle _ that the pope survived.” The moment that Duretti finished speaking, he crashed towards them, moving at an incredible speed. He headed directly towards Ava and Mary, who had been standing next to each other.

Without thinking, Ava grabbed Mary, phasing her through the attack. Duretti turned around behind them, his new and massive claws screeching against the stone floor. 

“Thanks for that, Ava.” Mary whispered as she drew her weapon. She fired two shots before being forced to dive out of the way. Duretti raged forward again, clearly gunning for Ava. She phased through or avoided each one of his advances, but it wasn’t easy. Whatever he was, he was the fastest demon she had ever seen.

Camila quickly sprang into action, aiming bolt after bolt at Duretti’s demonic eyes. As he thrashed around the hall, his massive limbs and tail crashed into the crowds of civilians who couldn’t get out of the way fast enough. More blood spilled across the floor and screams began anew.

Beatrice and Lilith were also attacking, although no one’s attacks seemed to have any effect whatsoever. Knives and claws, bullets and bolts - it made no difference. It barely slowed him down. Ava was getting tired, she was draining the halo faster than it could recharge. Her thoughts began to turn to panic, when everything stopped. 

“Enough of this.” Duretti sounded frustrated. He pointed a claw at Ava’s sisters, while muttering under his breath. As if tied to an invisible string, they were lifted from the ground, their weapons clattering to the ground. Each of them struggled against whatever Duretti had done, but it was futile. They were stuck and Ava was now facing the demon alone. 

“Okay… We don’t have to do this…” Ava whispered, backing away from Duretti as his claws clicked against the stones. The fear in her voice was obvious and she hated herself for it. She looked up at her sisters, at Beatrice, solemnly - almost as if she knew what was coming next. 

Without a preamble, or a villain’s monologue, without so much as a dramatic fight, Duretti shoved his clawed hand through Ava’s stomach. Her scream filled the room, for a moment, until the blood filled her mouth. As Duretti turned back towards the rest of the sister warriors, with Ava’s limp form hung over his demonic hand, Beatrice felt as though her world had already ended. Her blood felt leaden and her ears rang as she struggled against Duretti’s hold on her. 

Carelessly, he flung Ava’s lifeless form to the ground, returning his attention to the other sister warriors. “Who’s next?” He asked, as a venomous smile cracked across his disgusting face. It was obvious that he was beginning to have fun with this. Reaching out, he released Camila from his spell, and she fell to the ground, landing on her feet. 

“You next. The cute one.” Duretti laughed for a moment. “Do you want to fight, or should I just kill you now?” 

“If it’s all just a game to you, I think I’ll fight, thanks.” Camla replied, trying to sound brave. Even from several feet away, the tears on her face were obvious, as was her shaking body.

As Duretti pulled back his arm to kill Camila before she had a chance to fight, he curled backwards, as a sickening yell filled the air. The blue divinium blade pierced the other side of Duretti’s stretched, muscular chest as he continued to howl. It slid back out, then back in, several times, until his colossal form fell to the ground. He stopped screaming, stopping moving, and Beatrice, Lilith, and Mary were released from their supernatural bonds.

Ava stood where Duretti had been, leaning on the sword to keep her upright, as her blood continued to fall to the floor. 

“That was pretty sweet, huh?” She asked in barely a whisper, as blood trickled from the corner of her mouth. 

“Ava!” Beatrice ran forward as she yelled, managing to catch her before she fell back to the ground. “You can’t die… I won’t understand the references in your letter…” Beatrice jokes as tears fall freely. 

As Mary helped Beatrice lift the fading Ava, an absolute wail of sirens began growing louder and louder. Camila shot the locks off of the doors, freeing the surviving civilians and clergymen. She tried to avoid looking at those who didn’t make it, their bodies lying impersonal, on the floor. 

“Lilith, can you get us to the car?” Mary asked, her voice hurried. 

“Yes, of course.” Lilith took Mary’s hand on one side, Camila’s on the other. Once everyone was linked, she managed to teleport them all through several walls, back to the sidewalk where the car was parked. Ava undoubtedly, was the worst off, but Lilith looked horrible.

Camila took the driver’s seat, and after sliding several inches closer to the steering wheel, took off down the alley. Mary sat next to her, shouting directions and warning her about upcoming roadblocks. In the back, Beatrice tended to Ava while Lilith pressed herself against the window, trying to cool the burning ring within her mind. 

“Did we do it?” Ava rasped, once the most jarring of the driving was done. She tried to sit up, but Beatrice’s strong hand pressed her back into the seat. 

“We definitely did… Something.” Mary answered, turning around in her seat to look at Ava. “How is she looking?”

Beatrice’s face was tense and she didn’t answer immediately. “We’ve seen worse… Barely. But it’s not healing.”

“Halo… Drained.” Ava coughed, feeling herself slipping into the dark. 

“Hang on, Ava.” Beatrice felt a sob rise up from her chest as tended to Ava’s wound, the blood running across her hands. “Please.”


	22. Something Bigger than Yourself

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beatrice deals with her emotions as everyone recovers from battle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be a third installment, so dont worry. this is the final chapter though, okay? I'll update soon I promise! (Also the next chapter will be an alternate ending, but THIS ending is the one that matters for the next installment) Okay? got it? cool!

“Beatrice? Are you scared?” Ava asked, weeks ago, as they dined together, forced on a date by Mary.

“Scared? Of you? Of this?” She had replied, looking at Ava’s face, illuminated by the setting sun. 

“Of fighting… Of dying.” Ava averted her gaze.

“I’m not. When you join the OCS, of course you are aware of the possibility. But when you’re part of something bigger, something important… It almost seems inconsequential; the fight will continue on without me, as it has for thousands of years.” Beatrice replied, her words measured as she admired the golden fields that stretched into the distance. 

“That’s not what I expected you to say, but at the same time, it makes perfect sense.” Ava whispered, as she smiled. “I guess, now that I know you, you aren’t really what I expected at all.”

“I hope that’s a compliment, Ava.” Beatrice returned her smile.

“It is. I really like who you are.”

“Like?” Beatrice questioned, a huge grin now spreading across her face.

“Love! Okay!?” Ava laughed. “I love who you are.”

“I love who  _ you  _ are.” Beatrice grabbed Ava’s hand as she spoke. 

“When we aren’t on the run anymore, when we don’t have to spend every day training and fighting… Maybe we could do this again?” Ava asked, with flushed cheeks and bright eyes. 

“In this life or the next.”

Beatrice woke up with a start, tears rolling down her face as she sat up. Ava was asleep in bed, next to her, unbothered by Beatrice’s sudden movement. She sighed. Ava’s latest near death experience had added another layer of worry to her soul, another scar that wouldn’t heal. Beyond this, however, Ava’s brush with death had revealed a truth to Beatrice, one that she could no longer ignore.

She  _ loved  _ Ava. Of course, they had told each other this hundreds of times, but Beatrice had never understood what it meant. Not truly, anyhow. When you live your life convincing yourself that you don’t need love, that you are unworthy, it becomes a faraway concept. A philosophic question that always seems amorphous, that cannot be grasped no matter how much thought you dedicate to it. 

Love, Beatrice had learned, was not that. It was primal, wordless. It was the happiest pain you’ve ever experienced and the saddest happiness you’ve ever known. Every emotion came from somewhere that was deeper than one person could ever know, somewhere that could only be reached  _ together.  _ For the first time in her life, Beatrice realised the true meaning of  _ something bigger than yourself.  _

“Why are you awake already?” Ava murmured. Beatrice didn’t reply. Instead, she pulled herself into Ava, carefully matching the contours of her body. Beatrice’s strong arm wrapped around Ava’s waist, closing the already non-existent space between them. The halo hummed gently and shined through the thin blanket that they shared. 

“Are you okay?” Ava asked, more awake now, when Beatrice didn’t reply.    
“I am. I was just thinking…” She trailed off, unsure of how to verbalise what she felt. 

“About?” Ava wiggled and turned, so she could face Beatrice as she spoke.

“Do you remember when Mary tricked us into going on our  _ first date _ ?” Beatrice whispered, catching Ava off guard. 

“Of course. Why?” 

“You asked me if I was scared of death, and I told you I wasn’t.”

“I remember.” Ava looked into Beatrice’s eyes, searching for the meaning behind her words. 

“But I was scared of you dying.” She replied, finally. Beatrice’s thoughts flashed to their escape, to Ava.

“She’s not going to make it, we need to go to a hospital!” Beatrice had yelled, despite herself, as they drove.

“We can’t just go to a hospital, Bea.” Camila whispered, her face contorted with worry as she drove.

“We just killed the  _ pope,  _ we have no idea if our plan worked, and Ava has a  _ halo  _ inside of her. We absolutely cannot go to a hospital.” Mary reasoned.

“We can’t just let Ava  _ die. _ ” Beatrice spit, angry with her sisters.

“We’re not saying that we should! But we don’t have a lot of options right now.” Camila answered. 

“I can take her back to Cat’s Cradle. Now. I can get her to the infirmary.” Lilith stated, simply. Her face was ashen, but determined. Mary sighed.

Beatrice looked at Ava’s still face, then down at her hands, sticky and crimson. “Do it.”

“In this life or the next.” Lilith whispered, as she took Ava’s limp hand in her own. Moments later, they had vanished from existence, and the car was two occupants lighter. 

Ava’s blood covered the seat and Beatrice stared at it, immobile. Hours passed and no one said a word. Eventually, Mary dragged her from the back seat. Somewhere along the way, she and Camila torched the car, with their OCS uniforms inside.  _ An extra precaution,  _ Beatrice remembered saying, earlier that day. It seemed like years ago, a world away. 

Somehow, Camila forced Beatrice into civilian clothes, as Mary stole a new vehicle for them to travel in. “She’ll be okay, Bea.” Camila reassured her as she untucked Beatrice’s hair from the collar of her shirt. Beatrice didn’t reply. 

Back in the car, while Mary and Camila whispers in low tones, Beatrice was lost in thought. She remembered Ava’s smile, how it felt to hold her hand, the smell of her hair. Little things. Had it been the last time? Beatrice wondered if she had seen Ava’s smile for the last time, without realising it. 

Mother Superion was waiting for them as they arrived at Cat’s Cradle. Her face was grave. Beatrice feared the worst; she felt as though her chest would collapse. Time seemed to stretch as she made the short walk towards the door.

“What happened?” Mother Superion asked. Her voice was an indiscernible mixture of sorrow and anger.

“Short version? Duretti turned into a  _ fucking demon _ . Ava killed him before he killed us, but he impaled her. Lilith teleported her back because…” Mary paused, looking at Beatrice. “Because we didn’t think she would make it.”

“Did they…?” Camila whispered, her voice hoarse. 

“Barely. But yes. Neither of them are in good shape.” She answered, tersely. “You made the right decision. We’ll have to wait and see if the world agrees.” 

“Thank you, Mother Superion.” Beatrice spoke, finally, before sprinting through the building. 

“I didn’t die, though. At least, not a second time.” Ava said, snapping Beatrice out of her thoughts and back into the present. 

“I’m very well aware.” Beatrice replied.

“I’m sorry.” Ava’s tone changed drastically as she apologised. 

“No, I… I don’t want you to apologise. I just… I love you.”

“I love you, too?” Ava was confused. “You’ve told me that many times, though, Beatrice.” Yet each time, Ava felt her heart beat out of her chest.

“I know… But I think I’ve finally realised what it  _ means. _ ” Beatrice whispered, as she pressed her face into Ava’s shoulder. 

“You’ve been saying it this whole time  _ without  _ knowing that?” Ava asked, although her tone was light. 

“Yes and no. Being honest with myself and my emotions has never been easy for me…” Beatrice paused as she cuddled into Ava even more. “I knew what I felt, always, even if I didn’t necessarily understand it. Does that make sense?”

“No. But it doesn’t need to make sense to me, it only needs to make sense to you.” Ava whispered, her face pressed into Beatrice’s hair.

“It’s been a hard week.” Beatrice mumbled into Ava’s

“It’s been a hard  _ month. _ ” She retorted.

“Maybe now that things have calmed down…” Beatrice lifted her head to look at Ava. “Maybe we could finally have our second date?”

“Of course.”

For as long as she lived, Beatrice would never forget how she felt when she opened the door to the infirmary. Ava looked so small, so broken, almost blending into the white sheet on the bed. Lilith occupied the bed next to her, a similar pallor on her face. Chaos filled the room as the older nuns scurried around, tending to the wounded. Once Ava had been stabilised, Beatrice found a seat between her bed and Lilith. Mary and Camila joined her shortly afterwards. 

“We just told Mother Superion the full story. We still don’t know if our plan worked or not.” Mary told Beatrice as she walked in. She set a hand on Beatrice’s shoulder, a small comfort. 

“Apparently Lilith scared everyone when she teleported in - all covered in blood and freaked out.” Camila added, filling Beatrice in.

“What’s wrong with her?” Beatrice asked, looked at Lilith’s sunken face.

“I don’t know. I don’t know if anyone knows. Mother Superion said that once she brought Ava in, she just collapsed. Apparently she hasn’t moved since.” Camila answered, her voice cracking.

“Today has been a long  _ fucking  _ day.” Mary sighed, swearing for the second time that day without consequence.

“Bea, you should…” Camila stopped, obviously in thought, before rearranging her sentence. “Bea, Mary and I are going to go get cleaned up. Then we’re going to get some food. Once we get back, we’ll take your spot so you can do the same. Okay?” Camila spoke gently, understanding that Beatrice wouldn’t want to leave.

“I don’t…” Beatrice sighed and looked down at her hands.  _ Stained red. _ “Alright. I’ll wait here.”

“We’ll be back soon.” Mary added as they left the room. Beatrice didn’t respond, she was already lost amongst her thoughts. 

Mary returned first, with a tray of food in her hands. “Eat.” She commanded, setting the tray in Beatrice’s lap. At once, she realised that she was hungry, but simultaneously, she wasn’t sure if she could eat. 

“Thank you.” Beatrice managed, in a small voice. 

Camila returned shortly after with two massive armfuls of flowers. They were tied into several bouquets, with ribbon. None of the flowers she chose seemed to match, but in a weird way, they worked together. At the end of Lilith and Ava’s beds, Camila stacked bouquet after bouquet. It looked ridiculous, but everyone couldn’t help but smile. 

“Do you think this might be a bit overboard, Camila?” Mary laughed.

“No such thing.” Once Camila was done with her flower piles, she pulled a bottle of whiskey from within her robes. 

“My kind of girl!” Mary exclaimed. Camila poured a glass for each of them, with a heavier hand than one would expect from a nun.

“To surviving!” Mary said as she held her glass in the air.

“To Ava and Lilith!” Camila called, copying Mary’s gesture. They both looked to Beatrice, who took several seconds before speaking. 

“To… Killing the  _ fucking  _ pope.” She finally answered. They drank. 

“ _ Language  _ Beatrice!” Mary joked, socking her in the leg.

Two days later, Lilith woke up. “Why are there many flowers?” She asked, gesturing around the room. In that two day span, Camila had basically uprooted the entire garden and relocated it to the infirmary. She had also been baking, piles of cookies adorned the bedside table. 

“People care about you. Love you. You should start trying to accept that.” Camila said, slightly awkwardly, before continuing. “I may have been coping poorly with this.”

“That’s an understatement. Come here.” Lilith opened her arms to Camila and shared a hug, perhaps for the first time. Mary and Beatrice quickly joined in the hugging, all of them more emotional than usual. Understandably, though. 

“Did our plan work?” Lilith asked, after the weepy lovefest had concluded. 

“It remains to be seen.” Beatrice began, quietly. “The Catholic Church has been in complete disarray for the last few days. No one is  _ sure  _ of anything right now. No one is hunting us down, either.”

“What about Ava?” Lilith questioned, looking over at the halo bearer in the adjacent bed. 

“Still unresponsive.” Mary whispered solemnly. 

It was another two days, agonising slow days, before Ava woke up. With a gasp, she sat bolt upright, startling her sisters who had all been in the room. 

“Ava!” Beatrice yelled, rushing to her side in a moment. 

“Did we win?” She asked from Beatrice’s embrace, not unlike Lilith had.

“It seems like it.” Camila answered, with a smile. 

“We won’t know for sure for  _ at least  _ a few more days.” Mary added. 

Beatrice knew that she would never forget how she felt when Ava woke up that day. Moments before, it was as though her heart and soul were leaden, heavy. Hearing Ava’s voice had melted away that feeling, leaving an unmistakable light in its place. For what seemed like the hundredth time, Beatrice wondered when Ava would stop giving her emotional whiplash. Most likely, she never would. 

“What do you want to do for our second date?” Ava questioned as they held each other, unwilling to leave the warm comfort of the bed, even though breakfast had begun. 

“I…” Beatrice began, before realising that she hadn’t thought that far ahead. “I have absolutely no idea.” Ava laughed. 

“Don’t laugh! I don’t have a lot of experience with this!” Beatrice feigned embarrassment. 

“Me neither, so I’m sure I’ll be impressed with whatever you come up with.”

“Right now, can we stay in bed a little longer?” Beatrice asked. She had never felt so resentful of the OCS schedule before. 

“I thought you’d never ask.” Ava replied, pulling Beatrice in closer. 

“I like this.” Beatrice whispered from within her cocoon. 

“Me too.”

Suddenly, Ava shivered, her blood icy. The scar, the dormant corruption, that Adriel left on her arm suddenly burned, ferociously. She swore that she could feel it moving through her veins. 

“Ava? Are you alright?” Beatrice pushed herself up to look at Ava.

“I…” Ava stopped. The feeling had subsided for the moment. “I’m fine, sorry, I just got cold for a second. Beatrice’s eyes narrowed for a moment, then widened again as she decided to trust Ava’s words. 

“Okay.” She nestled back into the blankets, back into Ava. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” 

_ Oh Ava, I can’t wait to see you again.  _


	23. Heavy (Alternate Ending)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the alternate ending. for the 3rd installment, the previous chapter is the actual ending. got it? ok cool bro

“Beatrice? Are you scared?” Ava asked, weeks ago, as they dined together, forced on a date by Mary.

“Scared? Of you? Of this?” She had replied, looking at Ava’s face, illuminated by the setting sun. 

“Of fighting… Of dying.” Ava averted her gaze.

“I’m not. When you join the OCS, of course you are aware of the possibility. But when you’re part of something bigger, something important… It almost seems inconsequential; the fight will continue on without me, as it has for thousands of years.” Beatrice replied, her words measured as she admired the golden fields that stretched into the distance. 

“That’s not what I expected you to say, but at the same time, it makes perfect sense.” Ava whispered, as she smiled. “I guess, now that I know you, you aren’t really what I expected at all.”

“I hope that’s a compliment, Ava.” Beatrice returned her smile.

“It is. I really like who you are.”

“Like?” Beatrice questioned, a huge grin now spreading across her face.

“Love! Okay!?” Ava laughed. “I love who you are.”

“I love who  _ you  _ are.” Beatrice grabbed Ava’s hand as she spoke. 

“When we aren’t on the run anymore, when we don’t have to spend every day training and fighting… Maybe we could do this again?” Ava asked, with flushed cheeks and bright eyes. 

“In this life or the next.”

Beatrice awoke with tears in her eyes, as she reached across the bed for Ava. It was empty and cold. She pulled herself into a sitting position and wiped her eyes. It was early, she realised, looking out the dark window. Silently, she slid out of bed and got dressed, quickly heading outside. 

Her feet knew where she wanted to go before her mind did. As the sun rose, Beatrice walked the gently sloping path that wound to the top of the hill. The early morning air made Beatrice’s tears feel like ice against her face, yet she barely noticed the sensation. Instead, she was overwhelmed by the sheer silence of the morning. 

Once she reached the top, she sat, becoming still. She focused on each breath, trying to make them deep and even. Her eyes closed as she breathed, stopping the tears for the moment. When she focused, she could almost forget everything that had happened.  _ Almost.  _

Opening her eyes again, she took in the view. The sunrise had painted the sky a terrific pink, and the town below was just beginning to wake. It was a stunning morning, and for the first time in days, Beatrice felt calm. Not happy, but calm. She feared that happiness might become a dream, an object of the past. 

Beatrice pulled an envelope from her pocket with gentle hands. It weighed barely more than a feather, but to Beatrice, it weighed a ton. She sighed. Everything felt heavy lately, especially the halo that was newly nested between her shoulder blades. Beatrice didn’t think she would ever get used to the feeling of it. She didn’t  _ want  _ to get used to the feeling of it. 

Slowly, she opened the envelope, withdrawing a single sheet of folded paper. Ava’s childish handwriting adorned the page. For a moment, Beatrice’s eyes swam with tears, making the letters unreadable. She looked up, took a deep breath, and tried to read again. 

_ To Beatrice, _

_ If you’re reading this, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m not there with you, I’m sorry I didn’t make it. I cannot imagine what you are feeling right now, but I know if it were me, I would be broken. Beyond broken. Our time together was short, too short, yet it was the best of my life. I know, my life was pretty uneventful, so that isn’t great praise. But being with you, being with the other sister warriors… You all were the family I never had. Thank you. _

_ Maybe I don’t have the most life experience either, but I know that I loved you Beatrice. I loved you with a depth that surprised me. It scared me at first, if I’m being honest. You quickly became a constant in my life, if it weren’t for you I wouldn’t have even made it this far.  _

_ I know I’m not an OCS expert, but if I’m dead, then it’s not out of the realm of possibility that you received the halo. I won’t lie to you and say it's amazing, because it’s not. Well, it is, but it isn't. You’ll understand that, I hope. You’re going to be a great warrior nun, Beatrice.  _

_ I wanted to pack this letter full of jokes and puns. Stupid Ava stuff - to make you laugh. But, it didn’t feel right. One day, I hope you’ll be happy enough to make your own dumb jokes again, to laugh again.  _

_ In this life AND the next,  _

_ Ava _

_ P.S. I love you. _


End file.
